Struggling...

Thanks, Heidi! (sorry about the Heather??) Waiting to hear more about your plan. BTW, I went to the groc store last night and bought protein bars and some SF candy. Also, some Skinny Cows. Jean

I'm sorry you are struggling. And I know exactly what you mean by failing again... and I know this is a hard time of the year. I agree with HA's post... You can do it. I'm pulling for you. Just a little kick in the butt. Take care, Abbie

Hi, Abbie! Thanks for your kind words and support! . It IS a hard time of the year but that's not an excuse. Have taken some steps to having healthy alternatives available for me at work. Take care, Jean

Well bend ova cuz I'm kickin' you!!! You don't want to mess up everything you've done and sacrificed so far to get to this point! You did not have all that major surgery and spend all that recovery time and do all that worrying and fretin' over "Are they going to approve me for surgery?" for nothing!!!!! If you go back now, it will have been a waste of time, money and effort! Please don't f it up now! You've come too far! Plus that, you don't want to go back to being miserable again! I know I was miserable at my highest weight and I did not like myself at all. My self esteem was very low and it showed. I hardly even talked to anyone especially men! I was so consumed with being fat and trying to camoflauge it and thinking that everyone else only saw the fat, that it consumed my whole being and had a real negative impact on my life. Please don't go back to mistreating your body! Good Luck, stay strong and keep the faith! Put that sugar and all those carbs down right now!!!! Please... Now that's a good swift kick!!!!

Hi, Francine! I'm not into S&M but thanks for the good swift kick! lol You are soooo right about not wanting to mess up all my hard work. I've given away or thrown out the clothes I've worn in the past because gaining wt is NOT an option. I know what you mean about the self esteem thing. I didn't realize how bad it was until recently. Hiding and feeling miserable, yup, that was me! Thanks again for your kind words and support! Take care, Jean

Hi Jean, I 'm srry to hear that you are struggling with your daily intake but in the same breath it is making me feel better that I am not the only one in this boat. When reading alot of messages on this board it makes me feel very inadequate sometimes. I feel like everybody else has it all figured out .People talk about getting all their protein in and water everyday and avoid bad carbs all together and I sit here and wonder why my mind isn't in thatperfect place that their's is in. I do love sharing and hearing about everyone's sucesses but I think it would very helpful when we(by we I mean myself and anyone who feels the same way) get real and try to help and encourage each other to get through the daily grind.I don't think anyone of us could ever consider ourselves a failure of any sort for all that we have endured and how far we have come, but I do think the it is only going to get harder from here on in.For me knowing that I am not the only one struggling is a help to me,it makes me feel less inadequate knowing tat maybe this is part of our journey and that we need to learn how to overcome this mental side of our obesity struggle. Thank you for sharing.I hope we can continue to have many more discussions on this subject. Cheers, Donna

Hi, Donna! Thank you sooo much for your support! I hate to admit it but I think I WAS one of those who did everything right!!! Then, reality set in when I took my first bite of taboo foods (the dreaded carbs!). Seems like I am craving them all the time now!! I don't really feel deprived or angry that others can eat the holiday goodies, it seems to be more of a physical craving. I really did much better when I avoided them completely. I was sooo focused on getting my protein in first and then having something else if I had room. I refused to eat "empty calories"! Now, I can eat more at one sitting and have started "grazing" ala cookies, choc covered pretzels, etc. Got to get back to basics (and I have taken some steps)! My brain tells me that it is impossible to refrain from carbs entirely but I don't seem strong enough to resist them. I'm thinking about allowing one bite or one small treat daily and see how that goes. Thinking of you and everyone else who is struggling over this holiday season. Love to hear more of your story, Donna! Thanks again for your kind words of support! Jean

Hi Jean, I could have written your post word for word. I too can eat sugar without having any dumping. When I found that out I started eating more and more sugar. I put lots of sugar on my cereal every morning. I eat cookies, cake, cupcakes. Not all the time, but I have sugar everyday. I keep saying, tomorrow...tomorrow I'll start fresh. I know that it's out of control and I need to put an end to it. I haven't lost weight in a few weeks and I'm really worried. I too don't drink a lot of water...I drink gatorade, but not enough. I've never been one to drink fluids, so I struggle with it. I have some sort of condition where the opening from my esophagus to my stomach doesn't always open...with fluids. Food seems fine. So I tend to not drink. We should kick the sugar habit together! I'm so ready to make it all go away LOL!