Another July 16ther--- and a Goodbye To Food

My all liquid pre-op low-cal diet starts Wednesday. I've lost 56 pounds already, but the surgeon requires it, so I have every intention of giving the man what he wants-- which is 855 calories a day of yummy (bleurgh) Optifast for a couple weeks. I know a lot of people have Last Supper Syndrome-- they eat the things they will miss "one last time"-- and that last time goes on for weeks. Pre-op gain isn't unusual. That's not something I could get behind-- but I did decided that I will now have a three day Farewell to Foodz, just the same. 72 hours of misbehavior. It started out as a binge sorta thought, but I found out after last night's dinner out, I don't like the way I feel when I eat crapola anymore. The Last Italian Dinner was: + Penne pasta with chicken in a vodka blush sauce (I ate about 600 cal.s worth--- half the entree!) + 5 (small) pieces of tomato and garlic bread + Cheesecake with strawberries This was all really tasty but it made my nose run-- I'm not used to full-fat cheese anymore! Even though I binged zealously and intentionally, I still only clocked about 1800 calories for the day (and did 400 cals worth of exercise.) I then got this major craving for Diet Coke-- I haven't had any soda since February. So I bought a liter of Decaf Diet Coke (I won't touch the hi-octane stuff anymore-- I'm caffeine free.) I put some lemon in it and it was a tasty treat, which isn't gonna impair me much. And in two days, done with soda for good. Tah dah! I decided that today would be a binge-a-palooza. Stopped in a convenience store this am to buy all the nasty crap I loved and won't be having-- and realized it's just not all that anymore, but it IS a bag of chips--- in fact, it's a small bag of Doritos and a small bag of Chex Mix--- both which will be gone by sundown today. Tomorrow's rampant stupidity festival involves a last trip to McDonalds. And the 4th of July, my very last day of eating solid food for the next month or so, will end with a cheeseburger and onion rings. Pretty silly, I know. This isn't your average stupid binge, though-- it's a funeral for some old friends I have sort of outgrown. I am learning that food doesn't do for me what it once did, and it actually helps me to experience that--- makes me look forward to the leaner, healthier phase to follow. I don't wanna be talked out of it--- because I actually think it needs to happen. I know, I'm weird. I think Wednesday and the weeks to follow will actually come as a kind of relief!