Venting

Like everyone else on this board I'm 9 months out. Down 120lbs (started 377 now 257). At my last check up they said they'd like me down another 20-30 lbs for my one year. Anyway yesterday my mom tells me she went rummage saleing over the weekend. She bought me a shirt, no problem. Well I looked at the size and it was a 26-28. I've been in a 18-20 for 2 months now, sometimes I can get into a 14/16. I started at a 30-32. I felt really bad but didn't say anything. But then she says to me out of no where "I don't think you're going to make your doctors goal". I tell ya it was a slap in the face. I know I've been at a 2 month stall but I lost 3 pounds over the weekend and was feeling really good. I swear she's out to sabotage me. I go there for lunch and she'll make potatoes, fried foods, all the things I can't eat. So I'll go in the fridge and get some cheese and sandwich meat. When she asks I tell her I can't have it, but it doesn't sink in. Then she buys cakes and sweets and gets upset that I won't eat them. Needless to say she and my dad should NOT be eating them either. I know there's not much I can do with her, just needed to vent.

Pray for her and keep on keeping on. She is your mother. No exchanges there. My family sometimes does things like asking me if I want french fries or ice cream and I politely decline. Never mind the stall, it happens. This too shall pass. Thank her for the clothes and find someone to give them too. Keep up the great work, you have come so very far. I started at 367 and I am now at 245 and have been for 2 months, but I continue to lose inches. I'll bet you are losing inches as well. Chin up girlfriend you are still fighting the good fight and winning. Claim your victory!!! Happy dancing for you Huggzz, Bejai!!!!!

Hang in there! I know that when I was at my grandma's house for the holidays she kept trying to feed me all those things too. It's a way of life for her...the way she shows love (through food). I just politely declined and tried to remember that I had this surgery for me and that my family and friends won't/can't change...nor should they have too. Heck, when my husband and I were still together (read bio if you want the details) he would ask me if I wanted things I couldn't/shouldn't have...and he lived with my choices every day! I think it's habit for some, and jealousy for others...either way, so not your problem. Don't let her get to you....you CAN reach your surgeon's goal. You ARE looking wonderful (I'm sure!). You CAN eat healthy even when faced with the choices she wants you to make....just say no thank you and be done with it!! Vent away....but also be encouraged...You CAN and WILL be healthy and happy at goal!!! Christina S

Maybe I'm very lucky in the relationship I have with my Mom but I always tell her what I think, just as she always tells me what she's thinking. She buys crap (candy, cookies, chips) and keeps it in her house saying it's for my 6 year old niece, or my brother. Well, my brother could lose 75+ pounds, and he's diabetic as is my Mom, and my niece doesn't need it or she'll end up like all of us. I give her a hard time constantly. She goes with me to all my follow up appointment and knows what I can and can't eat. She slowly starting to get healthier snacks. She went with me to my 9 month appointment on Monday, and when she heard I'd lost 160 pounds, she cried. On the way home she actually told me she never thought I'd do it, that she's very proud of me. I say speak up, tell your Mom that you appreciate her thoughtfulness, but the shirt was way too big. Sit her down and tell her you can't eat those bad things anymore, and your going to make that goal, you've made up your mind and your not letting anything stop you. Unless you speak up she'll never know what your thinking, and you'll be miserable stewing over it all. Life is way too short to be unhappy!