Not Happy

I have been off on Christmas vacations for a week now and I have one more wee****il I go back to work. I have been doing sooooo bad on my eating. I can eat chocolate and I have been eating it EVERYDAY. I made some pumpkin chocolate chip cookies with splenda and I swear I can eat at least 4 a day, not all at once but through out the day. I am weighing 143 and was hoping to go back to work weighing in the 130's but my weight is fluctuating from 143 to 147. I know it is my fault, I even started exercising on my stationary bike. I don't know why I'm going back to my old habits but I feel like I can't stop, I'm scared that I will regain my weight and become a failure. See I know all this but it doesn't stop me...why? Also, my husband doesn't support me as much as he use to. He sees me eating the wrong stuff and he says "it's up to you". He doesn't tell me that my weight loss is good or that I look good. If I put something on that I think makes me look good I have to ask him about it instead of him telling me on his own. He use to always tell I looked good in what I was wearing and this is when I was overweight. I met him when I was 125 lbs. so it's not like he's a chubby chaser. I think this is what makes me eat too, I know it should not be an excuse.

Well my husband doesnt seem as supportive either. Prior to surgery he was begging me to go work out at the gym... to pick up a hobby. Now that I have lost weight and I try to work out 3-4 days a week, he complains and tells me my priorities are misguided and all I think about is exercising !!!! Sometimes, there is no pleasing our men .

I'm so glad I'm not the only one. I have been absolutely terrible since a little before Thanksgiving. Luckily I have lost 8 pounds in that time but know it would be more had I laid off the cookies. Don't beat yourself up, I think it's fairly normal at the 5 month mark. I ask too: Why are we doing this to ourselves. I can still eat only tiny amounts of protein before I get full so I think that's why I eat other stuff, so I can eat more. What kind of thinking is that???? Hang in there, I'm reading Carnie Wilson's first book - "Gut Feelings" it's helping a lot. I am hoping to fini**** this week and start on her 2nd book "I'm Still Hungry" next week. New Year's is coming up, I'm planning on jumping on the diet bandwagon and getting back on track. I really want to be at goal by summer and I have about 40 more to go.

Terri, I am going through the same thing. Novemeber and December have been so hard for me. They are emotional months, and filled with food! Doesn't help that sugar doesn't make me sick. At this point the only thing saving me from failure is the size of my stomach - but I know that will not last forever. I am also jumping on the bandwagon January 1. Let's do it together! I only need to lose 20 more pounds! I CAN do this! WE can do this! With me? HUGS Kimberly

HI YALL I AM SOOOOOOOO GLAD TO SEE I AM NOT THE ONLY ONE DEALING WITH THIS .. I TOLD MYSELF OK COME THE FIRST I CANT CHEAT ANYMORE .. SARA 283/188/140

I'm with you Kimberly, I say we post each week if we have lost/gained any weight and what bad things we have eaten. Maybe if I see that you keeping with the program then I will feel I need to too. Thanks

HEY GUY'S I'M AM WITH YOU ALL? I HAVE BEEN HAVING THE SAME PROBLEM! I WENT THE TRADER JOE'S AND GOT ME SOME TOFU FOOD PRODUCTS. I'M EATING ALITTLE MORE THEN BEFORE, SO INSTEAD I FIGURE THAT I CAN EAT A LITTLE BIT MORE AND NOT PUT THE CALORIES ON. ITS FILLING AND IT DEFEATS THE PERPOSE! BUT COUNT ME IN AS FAR AS US ALL GETTING TOGETHER AND SUPPORTING EACHOTHER.LOTS OF LOL SENDING YOUR WAY!

OMG you guys! I am going through the SAME exact thing. I feel like I can eat a horse! And my protein, well, it sucks. My hair is still falling out like nobody's business, so I don't exactly know why I am not eating like I should. Seems like having a cueball head in my future would motivate me to be good. I still have about 35 pounds left to lose. Let's do this!

Hi Terri.. Like almost every other issue that is posted on these boards, you are not alone as you can see. The one thing that this surgery does not take into account it the mental end. Most of us, myself included are emotional eaters. This doesnt go away with the snip of a surgeons knife it just leads us to an even bigger thing to deal with. I wish there was more of an emphasis put on the mental health of the bariatric paitents. My surgeon is wonderful, his program is very informative and complete but lacks that emotional end. I guess the only way we can get thru it is to lean on others in the same situation. Personally, I find myself from time to time wanting to go back to those old habits. Wanting a snack or to try something that I shouldnt have but Ive managed to avoid it mainly by reminding myself of how far Ive come. Asking myself, is taking that bite really worth the chance of relapse and going back to my old habits? I keep a picture of myself before surgery with me all the time as a reminder of how far Ive come. I didnt take this huge drastic step to sabotage myself. Take comfort in the fact that we are all in the same boat and are here for each other thru this journey. These boards are filled with wonderful people that can get us thru it! Hang in there and congrats on your success so far!! Deb C 336/211/wherever I land .....

I was having this discussion with my husband tonite - about all the different feelings that have been running thru my brain recently. You all have just summed up those feelings in these postings and now I don't feel so alone. I'm not crazy, REALLY. I'm guessing that these feelings, the ability to eat much more, struggling with the temptations of food during the holidays and the emotional rollercoaster that my life feels like is the whole reason that my Dr. calls this surgery a TOOL, not a cure. It's alot of work to bring all of the changes into perspective and synch, to be comfortable with the person I am becoming but also knowing that she was always there. Am I making sense? I think this is the time that this message board can be so helpful and supportive. Thank goodness for all of you. Happy New Year. Hears to a great 2006 for everyone. Kitty