Emotions

I know we should all be giving thanks and saying good things and keeping our spirits up here but I have had it. I went to the store today and had to wear my winter coat because of the wonderful Michigan weather. Anyway, the holidays bring out good and bad in people. There was a man and wife checking out in the lane next to me and he kept staring at me and whispering to his wife, then looking away quick when I caught their eye. It beats all I've ever seen. I felt like I was in grade school again. I came home and cried for almost an hour. My husband was very supportive and said I am doing fine and that I am losing the weight. I told him I know but I have been stuck for so long that I feel like I will not lose anymore. I wish people would be considerate of others feelings. I can see how I got to be the 444 pounds I was at. PEOPLE! EMOTIONS! These two things do not mix well! Sorry...I hope I haven't made anyone upset with this. I just figured my July group is the only people *****ally will understand what I am going through. My husband is a little overweight, he weighs about 250 now and is 6 feet tall. Sure he could stand to lose about 50 pounds, that is besides the point. He just is not capable of knowing what it feels to be stared at with mean intentions. I still have so much weight to lose, and I hate being in the public, I do not want anyone else to feel embarrassed by me so I have shut out doing anything with him for so long. Down and out in Michigan... Mandie

Mandie **hugs** Look, it is definitely ok to talk about EVERYTHING you have going on related to obesity..not just the surgery and issues surrounding it. That said...there will always be people out there who are base and common. They find something about a person, and belittle them, and pick, and name call and sneer, thinking better of themselves as they do so. In reality, THEY are the person to be pitied and prayed for. Someone that has that low a life that they have to pick at someone needs help. Sweetie you are DOING GREAT! Hold you head HIGH! No matter what your physical weight may be, you are a wonderful, valuable, amazing person. Be proud of who you are and who GOd made you to be. Someone like the people you encountered may have less physical size than you but they sure don't have the heart you have! You can lose weight, but it is a LOT harder for them to get class and gain in character what they are lacking. Blessings! Kathie 285/272/**223**/150ish???

Oh honey, that breaks my heart!! People are so cruel! What a bummer you are going through this. I wish I had some wonderful words of encouragement for you, but all I can do is commisserate. You are right, we on the July board are here for you and know what you are going through. Take care. I'm thinking about you, Mandie. Lisa

No offense, but are you sure they were talking about you? Sometimes things are not what they appear to be. He may have been saying you look like someone they knew or ,...... I'm sorry you feel bad. Pam W

I agree with Pam. You may have just really been feeling down about yourself, and therefore, if someone looked at you the wrong way you may have totally read something else into it that wasn't even there. I know I used to do that all the time. Now, I am old enough that I don't care what other people think of me. If someone wants to put me down to feel better about themselves- they can go for it- it's not gonna hurt me and besides, I just feel sorry for them for being so shallow. I too am sorry that you're feeling badly. Don't give up Mandie. It might take a little longer than you expected, so concentrate on your school work or your child or something. Try to forget about the weight loss for a while and just live your life. (((hugs)))) Michele

Mandie- I am so sorry you got upset today at the store.... You have been doing so well, and I understand how a situation like that can hurt. Whether or not the people were talking about you, it still makes you feel crappy and miserable. ((((Hugs)))))) Just remind yourself how far you have come, and what a wonderful person you are. Hang in there sweetie! andrea

Mandie- BIG HUGS to you!!! You are doing AWESOME with your weight loss! I love your newest picture! You can really see your loss in your face. Maybe they were thinking- Wow, that girl needs a new coat. That one is WAY too big for her! I think you are really beautiful! And you are doing awesome!!!!! Linda

Mandie, Thank goodness for the July Board! We love you. Never give up on yourself. You are important. Do not let life pass you by because of someone else. God loves you, we love you and your husband loves you! Get out there and enjoy life and to heck with shallow minded people. Thinking of you in Mississippi, Sonya Sumrall

Mandie, People are so callous sometimes! And it may not have been what you thought, but I know it still hurts to have these feelings. I know you feel like this will take forever, and you want it now, NOW, NOW! But you are moving forward like you never have before in your life! Just think of how far you have come in the last 4 months, and picture if you would have been in that same store 4 months ago. Now, you have hope, you have something to look forward to, you have the best tool in the world! I love you girl, please don't get discouraged. We are here for you though. I am so thankful for this messageboard. Love, Cristi

Mandie Maybe they saw you before and saw you know and see the progress. POSITIVE SPIRIT is what we have to maintain- We have to lose the low self esteem as we lose the weight and GAIN CONFIDENCE- we all know you are doing very well and we love you. People are cruel.. I cannot tell how many times I was called nasty names-or told so pretty too bad she has no self control and can lose weight. I still hear it in my head- tainted for life. I ALWAYS was self conscious> got to the point where I did not want to leave my house. This surgery gave me the opportunity to fight back - I have self control- I am trying and as slow as it going - I remember I did not gain overnight. I always attribute the emotions I have that are less than positive to "that time of the month". I then learn to ward off the demon of low self esteem. Sorry to tell my lil dark secret...my heart breaks when I hear these things as I know the feelings oh so well. Sounds like you have a GREAT husband and he sounds very supportive. LEt it go... and may you feel peace... Keep up all your doing> It tooks guts to go through this lifestyle/ eating change! You are a tough gal. Lots of hugs Pattiann