OK, she just got hom...

OK, she just got home and tells me that she's going to Michigan and she's leaving Sat night at 10 pm and driving through the night with three friends. They are taking her car and they have no money so they can't afford a hotel plus she's not old enough to get a room. She's going for this HUGE swim meet so she really wants to go. She hasn't talked about this at all with DH and I except to tell us she's going! What should I do? I need some advice and fast! Do I put my foot down and say NO, or say I don't care she's 18 and she will do whatever she wants anyway. What would your parents have done? Tammy

If she's an otherwise good kid and wants to go for the right reasons, I'd say try and support her. Can you take time off and invite yourself along. Can you afford to pay for a hotel room? If she's the rebellious type, I'd say put your foot down. I don't think my parents would have cared if I went or not..... One of the girls that works for me just went through something similar with her 17 YO son. He said he wasn't going to live by her rules. She told him that if he didn't then he could leave. So, he left. He was then considered a runaway by the law. She informed his "friends" that if they let him stay with them that she'd call the cops because they were abetting a runaway. She told him that he could come home if he wanted to live by her rules. He decided to come back and now he has to earn every privelege. She took away his bedroom and closet doors, she gave him an empty dresser and a mattress (no bed frame). She told him that if he wanted clean clothes for the next day that he'd have to earn them as well (by doing homework, turning it in, following her other rules). For now, it seems to have worked. I've got a 17 YO and 21 YO son. Let me know how it works out. Maria

It's not that we don't want her to go; she is a good kid straight A's and for the most part a very good kid. The problem is they are not thinking about any of this; it's just get in the care and go. They have some money but they are not old enough to get a hotel so they want to leave a 10 at night and drive straight through, THEY HAVE NO IDEA WHERE THEY ARE GOING!! Much less 3 teen girls. It's her car and he friends parents (so I have been told) are ok will all of this. I have told my dd that I want every parent to call me TODAY! And I wanted to talk to them to make sure they know what is going on. This is a tough one. I wish she would just stay young. Tammy

The scary thing for me is three teen girls driving all night by themselves. (did I get that right?) I as a mom would rather they get a room and drive during the day when it is safer (can see better if nothing else.) If they don't have the money for a room, maybe you could work out a payment thing with her, call ahead and reserve the room on your credit card and let the girls spilt that cost as well as gas, etc. It's a tough call, I had a boy and I think a girl would be harder to say yes to this. Good luck Tammy!

So....did she go?

So, how did it work out??