Ok I am angry
I will probably have this post pulled, but here it goes.
We all went through HELL to do this surgery, and we were all in it together. What I find on the board now disturbs me. I know this is supposed to be a supportive forum, but I feel like I have to say what I am going to say. If I offend anyone I apologise; it is really concern for everyone that motivates me. And to be honest, selfishness. I chose this board to come to for support and I don't want to lose it.
Does anyone else think obsessing about the last 10 to 20 pounds is greedy and unrealistic? Right now, my goal is to maintain the weight, and since most of us can eat with abandon (or accept the consequences), I would love to have strategies to combat my old habits erupting.
I find it INCREDIBLY disturbing that some people are resorting to tactics they've used before WLS. Jenny Craig, Atkins, Xenical, whatever your poison-- Did it work for any of us before? And aren't some of these options dangerous? Why do we opt for that rather than what works for us now. Eating 3 meals and 1/2 snacks, no eating or drinking with meals and exercise and maybe a little therapy. Basic ideas, yet people are looking for the magic bullet again-- What is with us-- I say us collectively-- I admit it, I fall of the band wagon as well.
Anyone big enough to admit they gained weight because they broke the rules. In October I gained 7 pounds-- all due to my old nemeses, chocolate and snacking. I just got back down to where I was in July.
Finally, I've come to the conclusion that I will never be happy with my weight. No matter how low I go, I will want more. Is anorexia plaguing anyone? I like food too much (still), but given my self perceptions, I am sure there is someone out here that needs a cyberhug and a resource to turn to, because of our poor body images. Any suggestions for dealing with that monster?
Again sorry if I offend anyone, but I've seen this board go from a support board, to an empty board complete with crickets chirping. Enough with teh superficial stuff. Let's TALK!
I didn't take your post as offensive at all. It is completely your opinion and you are entitled to that! I just found this site last month and wish that it had of been 6 months ago when my weight loss slowed drastically. I felt like I was the only person to hit a plateau and for like 6 months only lost 1-2 lbs. a month. I wondered why and what could I do to break the platuea...so I really enjoy reading the posts about what others are doing...or eating...it gives me ideas to try new things.
I definetly eat carbs and when halloween was here I ate one two many pieces of candy. I know I shouldn't but I made the choice to eat them and I have to live with my choices. I do however want to lose more than 10-20 pounds. I have done great losing 133lbs, but still want to lose like 50+ pounds more...so I need to change things up.
I couldn't keep weight off before because I couldn't keep up with the will-power to stick with a program...this is my new life and I needed to have more structure so I joined WW. I take my vitamins and drink my water and eat more protein than carbs or fruits/veggies. I just needed to make myself more accountable and I feel that for me this is helping to lose the rest of the weight I want to. I still look in the mirror and feel fat...I feel that we all will have some issues to deal with and however we deal with them will be our personal preference. I do agree with you about some of the programs where you eat prepackaged foods or take supplements to fill your stomach so you won't be hungry.
BUT before I found this web site I felt like I was alone in my troubles and since I joined this site last month...I realized that there are many, many others who ARE just like me and still have stuggles to deal with. Sometimes it's nice to vent and get things off your chest and have someone who feels the same way respond. When people are nasty and reply with negative words...it really is discouraging for people and they don't want to post anymore. This can be a shame because someone else may want to ask the same question but is hesitant to do so.
Anyway this turned into a super long post....I am ready to chat!!!
from a person who stopped losing at month 5- i understand the frustation of not losing anymore- my goal was 150... and i was stuck at 178 for such a long time- i would go down to 175.. then back up ...now with this metformin for the PCOS- it's cut my appetitie AND the tool is starting to work for me- i can't do sugar or fat or carbs anymore or i get SICK... i'm not doing anything else- just the metformin..
who is down now to 172 pounds!!! only 22 pounds to goal
jennifer
Does anyone else think obsessing about the last 10 to 20 pounds is greedy and unrealistic?
Those are your words Andrea? Very harsh indeed. Greedy? Unrealislic? You think so? I don't. I think EVERYTHING is attainable.. Another 10 ten pounds if I want it or winning the lotto if I want to buy a ticket each week... If I, or any one of us didn't think that our goals our dreams meant something we would have never had this surgery to begin with.
Sure for a lot of us this is a maintance stage. Those of us who have lost the weight in the past year. BUT their are plenty of us who I am sure are STILL losing.. trying to get to goal. They might not be losing at the same rate they were or who knows, maybe they are.. but they are trying..
what I'm saying is this Everyones experiance at this is so individual so personal.. we might all have some of the same sating habits and health issues.. but we all do it differently. Thats the thing.. You can't be mad at us for still striving and not being complasant. .. You don't think that I maybe steam from my ears when I get on here and see such low posts also? Or I see one from my friend Nan who says that after eating half a crossiant she barfed and will now go back to giving up bread?? @@ Hey wait a minute I NEVER stopped... You see? We all do it differently... Honey.. You are entitled to get mad and even take it out on us.. But I think that if we ever going to get this board back to a thriving forum again I don't think insulting those who are still trying to lose, maintain, or just simply reach goal is the way.
as always peace.. to you.
Mo
Well, let me tell you what happened to me - I lost 72 pounds over 4 months and then did not lose another pound at all. Then last month, I lost 2 pounds. The time frame for people to lose varies with everyone. Some are "done" and while short 15 or 20 pounds or "at goal" they are in the maintenance phase. You may be done and trying to maintain now, and that's great, but some of us never got to the point of healthy as we feel we could be - yet. I know I'm still on that journey. And while I do follow all the rules and even exercise nowadays, it's a longer process for me because of my age, and lots of other factors.
I don't think it's greedy or selfish to want to get to a personal goal. Indeed, much of this journey has relied on personal goals - whether those are numerical or whether they are behavioral - flying on an airplane, walking, playing with our kids and so forther.
There is a LOT of low self-esteem on these boards and I think all of us are trying to deal with life itself in one way or another. I'll be honest - I stopped writing on this board some time ago because I was getting annoyed with some of the posts and the posters - not their fault, my own bias against whiny-ness. It really irks me when people whine about stuff - even though I know I do it as well.
And our good friend Malibu who I think held this board together went poof - I know she has her own problems to deal with now - but she was the glue in many ways for the July board.
So long story short - I have no answers to the questions posed - only my boring opinions! 
I do wish everyone well and I do read the posts almost every day. It's been a busy few months for me personally and dI haven't been able to come here as often as I'd like, but you're right - all we have is us - and we shouldn't let that fall apart.
Loveya,
Nan
I do wish everyone well and I do read the posts almost every day. It's been a busy few months for me personally and dI haven't been able to come here as often as I'd like, but you're right - all we have is us - and we shouldn't let that fall apart.
Loveya,
Nan 
I position between you and Mo.
I'm grateful for the incredible benefits of this surgery. I feel and look better, and I choose to mantain the healthy perspective that opportunities continue to result from it.
Hells bells, I've lost 14 inches less in my waist and gained in other places. I am at a 28-29 BMI, still technically obese, but I will not obsess about this. If I gain a few, I accept the rigor to lose them. I may lose another 10 pound at some point, but I'm winning and I'm proud!
I think that some folks could benefit from counseling regarding the changes that they are now enjoying: choosing to get on with living a fuller life.
...and we must keep perspective: Amy battles daily to keep weight on!
By the way, Marge and I last night booked a three night holiday in New York arriving Dec 22 and leaving Christmas afternoon. Our son has wanted to visit for some years: he'll be with us. We'll be staying at the: Shelburne Murray Hill Hotel, 303 LEXINGTON AVE, New York NY 10016,Tel: 1-212-689-5200. I realize that you may be with relatives during Christmas, but it would be an honor for us to meet you and share a drink or a meal. Email me if that's a possibility.
Dave
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