How have you all changed............

since surgery? Do you think you have? What does your family think about the "new" you? Coworkers? I get so many people saying that I look great and people talking to me all the time now and some (i hear through the grape vine) are even jealous of my weight lost. Tammy

Where do I begin? The physical aside........I am a defferent person. I'm not even the same person I was when I was thin last time. That girl was bulemic and unhealthy, She was insecure, felt terrible about herself and was vulnerable. Now....well now I don't take crap from anyone. I stand my ground. I'm confident and strong. Now....if you mistreat me....I'll tell ya! The only positive trait I held onto from my fat days is my sense of humor. I became the funny fat girl to try to win people over with my personality and force them to see beyond my size. That part of me is still here and I love it! My coping skills have changes. My reward system has changed.........I reward myself with things or a massage or a pedicure instead of food. I don't think about food anymore. When I'm hungry....I think......"What can I have that'll fill me up quick" instead of....."What can I go lay me face in?" Good question Tammy! Malibu

At my baby sisters' wedding my brother asked my older sister if she thought I was getting "too thin". Cracked me up, I'm still at 190. I wear a 12 or 14 depending on the clothing. Have I changed? Yes! More confidence in myself. I was always confident that I'm smart, but not in the way people react to me. Now I'm confident enough not to worry so much about it. I like clothes now. I like skirts are dresses. I like shopping for them in regular stores and having choices. I've not heard anything negative about my changes in weight. Everybody has been positive or has been silent, which I sincerely appreciate. I do like the compliments when they come (okay, let's face it. I'm an attention *****) Good question Tammy. Thanks for asking. -Pam

Everything has changed for me. Because I have been so sick. I have had to depend on my kids alot. I never wanted to put off on my kids. But I know they love me. ( I am alot better now) And I was the biggest one at my work. Well now I am the smallest. So not any of the over weight people like me now. But hey it is their loss. Some young girls look at me mean sometime.And have smart @ss comments. I know it is because this old @ss woman looks better than them. I think other people change more than us. I am not a jealous person at all over nothing. I am so happy to see people do good and to have things they want. I don't have all I want but god gives me what I need. We have a wonderful god. Have a blessed day Amy

Hi! I had my surgery on 7/5/05 and have lost about 91 lbs...........that's it! I seem to be stuck at a weight I was at for a long time in my life.....I don't know what to do! Is it the way I eat? what I eat? I'm so disappointed and unhappy right now.........I was very happy when the weight was coming off and I do feel a whole lot better than before.more energy and I can breathe!!!!!!!!!! I do have more confidence but feel like it's slipping away every time I get on the scale and it stays the same or even goes up........I'm at 214 or 221 depending on the day I guess!!!!!! I really don't know what to do.......................... Mary D.

well.. now that i'm in a better mental state.. I am happier, MUCH more confident, and can keep up with my 3 year old. I exercise- I am healthier- inside (FOR SURE) and out. went from size 3X- getting tight- to larges (sometimes mediums) and 12's.... my goal anything lower now is icing on the cake.. i would like to lose 20-35 more pounds but we shall see.... i haven't lost anything now since saturday.. but i'm holding once again at 176.... body catch up time... lol.... i have been off work this summer (i'm a teacher) so i'm waiting to see if anyone says anything to me when we get back 2 weeks... i know all of my family and dh's family are proud of me.. and say i am looking great... jennifer

I really had to think about this before replying because, OF COURSE I've changed. The changes are so simple, but meaningful at the same time and I can't necessarily put a name or a "word" to them all. I'm obviously more self-confident, less self-conscious, more active, more "present" with my kids, I have more energy, but I KNEW all these things would come with the weight loss. I was thin growing up - probably until the end of high school, but I always THOUGHT I was fat (to the tune of 126-135 lbs - how I wish I was that fat now!). So the biggest change for me now is seeing myself as I really am. I can look at myself now and see that I'm actually thin. I go through the smaller opening of the revolving doors, I'll scoot behind someone's chair because I know now that I'll fit, I'll plop my self right in between two people sitting on the train because I know I'll fit, I don't worry about getting up from the table at a restaurant and snaking my way through the dining room, because I know I'll fit. Its these actions that are most meaningful to me because they show that I see myself more accurately now. My friends and family are all proud and excited. One friend's husband said - boy, I thought it was a bit extreme and even stupid when you were said you were doing it, but looking at you know, it wasn't so stupid afterall! lol And my coworkers have all been my fanclub. I work with 5 men and they couldn't have been better throughout. One of them relocated to our London office shortly after my surgery and only sees me every few months and he's in town now and he just can't believe the difference. All in all, I've had a very positive experience and journey thus far.

I like to think of the changes as doorways. Many of my "doors" were closed or closing prior to surgery. I was less and less involved in many of the activities that had given me joy, acceptance, and responsibility. Those doors have again swung open wide! I find that I'm able to pick and chose which I want to pursue and at the level within which I am most comfortable. It is a place I hoped to be a year after surgery as I'm retiring and moving into new opportunities. I am able to sample so much more of life. Folks say they see some of the earlier Dave: more witty, engaging, and committed. No one at work has given me any grief about the surgery; instead, they are amazed at my progress! My extended family is pleased as are my wife and son. Another change lies within this group and the OH men's group where I find understanding folks willing to be constructive and concrete with suggestions. Then there is Channan, Arizona's answer to Ms. Universe... Dave