not going to make excuses

i was bad today. didn't exercise (expect for walking around target for 40 minutes) i had 4 sugar Icees (frozen popsicle things- my son and husband eat)- throughout the day.. but the dr did say i could have them- i even reasked- with or without sugar- and she responded- well you don't on sugar so why would it matter- (so would that be a "cheat?") I had a hamburger from mcdonalds for supper (and 2 fries) and drank my crystal light before the 30 minutes wait... here's been my week thus far- dh's car is broken down- so we have one car between us- not sure HOW MUCH it will be to fix his yet.. dh's mother has been in and out- and back in the hospital for the past 2 weeks.. went back in yesterday- came out today- i had to bring her home - that's why i just did mcdonalds drive thru- as son was getting so hungery (it was 6:30pm when we finally got her all settled at home).. not to mention- this PERIOD just is horrible pains and heavy heavy heavy... (never had this one like this before- OUCH) i'm trying to prepare for a garage sale (first one ever) for friday and saturday... (selling all my old big clothes- whatever doesn't sale- i'm driving to goodwill on saturday afternoon!!!!!!!!!!) I WILL NOT GET THIS HEAVY EVER AGAIN.. and i woke up with a summer itchy eyes, throat ear cold- and i can't talk... then we got an email from our daycare asking us to find a different provider for our son in the fall- because her varience (which i didn't know she's been working under one) won't be renewed and she can't take more than 10 kids- and since she opens early for us and we live not in st paul anymore (but that's where i work) she wants to drop our son. our son is adopted and has attachment issues- and it took a couple months for us to be able to drop him off there- and he's been asking for the past month when he's going to see his "karen" and friends... now i have no idea why this is happening- i thought she loved our son (she's a home daycare) and this just came out of the blue- very hurt and upset by this... very hurt.. like what kind of loser mom am i that her son gets abanded and why aren't we good enough- he didn't do anything wrong.. so what the HECK happened.. i'm very down again... sick, tired, overwelmed.. and so hurt- pain.. emotionaly and physically.... just HURT... and i ate at mcdonalds of all places... oh- and i ate a cheese stick at 8pm- just stuck it in my mouth and ate it..... without thinking.... but i did have my 2 eggs and slice of bacon for breakfast- and lunch was cottage cheese and fruit.. so i wasn't totally bad was i????? or did i totally ruin the day with the hamburger and 2 fries... ??? need my july love please..... jennifer

Jennifer Sometimes it's downright impossible to follow all the rules we've set for ourselves. I would have tried to avoid the sugar ice things, empty calories wether you can tolerate sugar or not, but it aint gonna kill you. If you only had one hamburger from MacDonalds thats not too bad. You might have tried something leaner if it's on the menu. I'm pretty strict myself on the carbs and wouldn't have eaten the bun. 2 fries is OK too. But sometimes with the pressures of being a parent you have to comprimise due to time constraints. I hate getting a summer cold. This is the time of year you're supposed to feel GOOD and enjoy the outdoors. I'm just getting over one myself but luckily it wasn't too bad. The day care thing is NOT your fault. Stop that "loser Mom" **** right now. Sounds like the day care lady made a strict business descision without considering the needs of your son. If thats the case then her compassion leaves something to be desired. You did not ruin your daily nutrition by eating that hamburger. The rest of your choices looked very bariatric friendly and reasonably healthy. Cheese is good. Calcium and protien! Comere and let me give you a big ol (((((hug))))) Tim

I just wrote this long response...then accidentaly deleted it! OOps! Anywho....I looked up everything you ate today and added up all of the calories and the grand total: 936! That's right! you are all worried about 936 calories missy and 54 grams of protein! You did FINE today! Malibu

Jennifer- Channan and Tim summed it up-- You were fine today! No one expects you to be perfect. You just need to keep plugging at it. Opt for one of the McD's salads next time--- or skip the bun. Think back to pre-surgery-- You would have super-sized the whole meal, right? Think how far you have come! Hang in there, sweetie, you are doing OK. andrea

More July love... Jennifer, you are doing fine. Tim stated it very succintly. Stop beating yourself up, especially for things you can't control. Take a breath. Repeat to yourself, "I am worth it." -Pam

jennifer, we all have these kinds of days. i have been having more and more of them this month than i think is really fair. but you have come so far...try not to get so down. try to remember "this too shall pass" good thoughts going your way. brandy

OH Man Ice pops with sugar Don't you dump?????????? Hamburger from McDonalds.......YUCK Just the thought of it turns my stomach and to t hink, I used to like them. You're better off with Wendy's Chili. Its the greatest and very good for us cause it's high in Protein. Being down is normal. Don't forget, your inside were turned upside down. Its normal that you are tired. However, what I founds is, if I have a protein shake, it wakes me right up. Up your protein and fluid intake. Don't let yourself dehydrate. Email me anytime if you want to chat. its always nice to meet new people. If you email me at [email protected], I will send you an article I wrote on "What To Expect When You Have Weight Loss Surgery. Hope to hear from you. Marie Edie