I keep waiting

I keep waiting.... To wake up from this dream and find myself over 400 pounds again To get out of breath when I'm working in the back yard For my back, knees and feet to start hurting again To start slowing down when I'm walking For my clothes to start getting tight meaning it's time to move up yet another size To hear that familiar creaking when walking across the floor or up the stairs For the disgusted stares from total strangers when I'm eating in public To see that fat guy in the mirror again I keep waiting to wake up from this dream but my reality is better than my dreams ever were. Well most of them....... Tim

Tim, You always have the most inspirational emails that speak directly to my heart. I too have these thoughts and bad dreams that I wake up fat again. It is amazing the tricks our brains play on us, but this is one battle we are winning and will continue to succedd at. The part about eating in public really hit home. I remember the way I used to feel when eating in public, like everybody was watching a pig in a troth.. but it didn't matter because I would mask the pain by just shoveling it in even faster.. It is such a gift to be free from the burden of obesity. Thanks for your post! Shannan

Tim- Thank you so much for that post. It's like you read my mind-- My nightmares have never been horrific-- they have always been grounded in reality (forgetting to Drop / Ad a class so I don't graduate; etc). Lately I have been having nightmares that I have gained all the weight back and am scared to leave the house. I get confused what is real vs. a dream in those cloudy moments when I first wake up. Sort of Matrix-y isn't it? The guy in the mirror is gone-- and isn't it wondeful?

I hear what you are saying, but it seems like forever ago that I hardly remember what it felt like. Is that weird? When I force myself to remember....yeah of course all those things flood back to me, but I just don't think about it much anymore. I just keep thinking.....Thank God! I feel better, I look better, I'm just myself again. ............Sigh of relief...........!!!! BTW.........You've got mail shug! C