aNYONES hUSBAND/ wife CHANGING

Well , i know mine is My old hubby has returned i love him to death but when we first started dating 7 yrs ago i was about 160 and almost there now .. But he had just gone thru his x wife having an affair w/ his best f... and he was so jealous . well i find myself back like before . he pays attention tyo every man , woman , that walks past me to see if they look at me and how they look at me . well the other day my cell phone was ringing and i hardly ever use that thing unless it is to call him or my children .. if i run somewhere . i said why didnt you answer it . NO i found him in the phone book lookin up the # and of all things it was a travel agency . so he though i must have a b/f there or something . And then yesterday he walks out to go to work and forgot somethin and walked in and phone was ringing he said oh perfect timing .. then i went off on him it pissed me off .. I havent done nothing but lose weight and become confident and i refuse to be hounded and punished for that wont happen .His big thing is i never want SEX i dont know why besides the fact i have 7 kiddos to keep up after and when 5 of them are at school it is nice to kinda have some me time .. I give myself all day to my kids and i guess when it comes to him maybe i am wore out .. i dunno . but i refuse to be accused of somethin stupid like this all because i dont want SEX .. i AM A MOM I STAY HOME , GO TAN , AND TAKE MY KIDS TO SPORTING EVENTS ,DANCE ETC.. OTHER THAN THAT I AM W/ MY KIDS ... I was pissed .. he did call and say sorry several times and again this morning . but i am just wondring if anyone else has this problem and how do we squa**** .... thanks for the help and listening ..

Well, if your husband was insecure at the beginning or your relationship when you were healthier, it stands to reason that now you are healthy again, those issues have come flooding back. His ex-wife cheated on him, and now that you're "desirable" to all these other men, he's probably afraid the same thing will happen. Before things get out of hand, it might not be a bad idea for the two of you to see a marriage counselor or therapist. The issues he has are difficult to work through, and it's not likely he'll be able to get through this on his own. I haven't gotten skinny enough for my husband to worry that I'll cheat on him. But he's not really the jealous type, either, so I doubt that will be an issue. If anything, he's gone from being too tired for sex (he works swing shift, so that totally messes up his internal clock) to wanting sex even if he's so tired he can't open his eyes. He loves my changing body (which makes me wonder how he felt about me 100 lbs ago), and he'll just about bend over backwards for me as long as I'll wear sexy underwear and frolick between the sheets. I can't wait to see what will happen when I'm under 200! MEN! Pamela -102

Thanks Pam . he suggested that .. he just doesnt like me to reject him . and push him away .. and i understand that . but I love my husband and he knows me and my beliefs . i would dump him before i cheated . and my kids are number 1 i want a family me him and them he knows me so well .. i guess it just stumped me but yes i dealt w/ this before and now once again even a time or 2 when i was heavy .. thanks for info and you are doing awesome

Just my two cents here. My kids are my priority too...so is my husband..I do not put one first and another second. Sounds like the guy needs some attention from you... I always say-kids will be long gone and it will be just the two of you..if you don't work on you two now there will be nothing left later. Don't put things off... If there is a problem between you two...sex or otherwise..get it taken care of before it gets too late. Writing this...I should heed my own advice..because I, too, have put my marriage on the back burner at times..in this demanding world.its easy to do. Just my opinion..take what you want from it..and leave the rest. Good Luck to you. Joanie

Sherri .. I'm no expert but I've been married 36 yrs to the same man. Is there anyway you can have a date night with your hubby?? Take a night where you can get a babysitter and just go out for dinner or a movie with the hubby! and then come home and cuddy if nothing else. It might even do the kids some good to have a night off from mom and dad! Sometimes it's just nice to be alone and it might be reassuring for him to have all your attention and not neccessarily in bed. Sue

Sorry about the hubby troubles Sherri. I agree with Sue - plan a date night! We need to put our marriages at the top of the priority list, because kiddos aren't at home forever. I'm praying for ya! Traci -93

I am going thru some of the same issues here. He was checking my email, sites I visi****ching me, listening to phone calls... He has no friends of his own. So we are in counseling now. And it is helping very much. I have 20 years with him, 15 1/2 of it married. I am getting happier and I want him to be too. I wish you the best! But sometimes men........ ~Tina~