Help me peers

I just can't get this out of my head. I had surgery 7/14/04 and I weighed 270, I have only lost 75 pds in almost 8 months. I excercise, drink lots of water and always eat protien 1st. I could just cry everytime I get on this website and see my peers losing so much more than me. Thanks Doty

Doty, please don't fret over this. With your loss, you are under 200. That is fantastic! I would KILL to be under 200, even if by one measley pound. You can NOT compare yourselves to others! With that said, I admit that I'm guilty of comparing myself, too. Each one of us has a metabolism that is uniquely programmed based on a long line of ancestors. For example, the Irish are known to store fat even on very little calories because they have had times of famine, which has rearranged their genetic code. Although I am a slow loser, and have been a slow loser since day one (13 lbs in the first month is NOT an astonishing weight loss), I'm finally able to accept it. I no longer base my success on what the "norm" is. Rather, I focus on the positive changes that have occurred. I might not fit into a size 10 jean...not even a size 22...but I feel relatively normal compared to my pre-op life. And although I still have 108 lbs to go, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Even though I am not at a healthy weight yet, I have my life back. And that's really all I ever wanted. Pamela 352/258/150

I agree with Pam. We all lose at our own rates. Try to focus on how far you have come. If I think about the 100 lbs. I still have to lose, I can get really discouraged, but then I think of how far I have come. I can walk 2 miles at a time now--9 months ago I could not walk 10 feet without being winded and having to rest. I am riding a bicycle for the first time in 15 years and having great fun with my grandson (our only grandchild so far). I may never reach my ultimate goal, but I can live again and may actually be around for my 60th birthday (it is in only 2 months, but last year it was doubtful I would be alive at that time). Stick with your program and focus on the positive--and there are many positives post-op. You are so mucha part of our little family and we are here for you. Monna

Doty, Ditto to Pam and Monna's replies. I think we've all been there. I do the same thing when I look at folks who had surgery on my date or after and have lost far more weight. But then I stop and think about where I am in only 9 months and realize gee this has never (in all of my best dieting and exercise days) happened before! Dame Tooter had a great post on the main board recently regarding plateaus and it really helped me get my head back straight. Glad you're hanging in here with us, Cyndi

Hey Doty I had my surgery on the 21st and I've only lost 76 lbs and I started at 311. It use to bother me too when I came to this board and compared my loss to others and I avoided this board for a few months but then came back. I don't measure my success in pounds any more. I use other methods for instance I feel sooooo good. I can ride a bike walk on my treadmill for over 30 mins and much faster speed. I can see bones around my neck and I can feel my hip bones when I put my hands on my hips I can also feel my ribs !!! I may not be a size 10 but I look a heck of a lot better than when I wore a size 28/30. I have to keep buying new clothes becuz they keep getting too big but thats not a complaint What Pam says is true we all are different and I'm not worried I'll get there and so will you. I come here for the support and everyone here understands what I go thru becuz whether they have lost more than me or not they have the same problems as I do. I'm sure with 75 lbs off you look wonderful and feel that way too. Don't worry about others enjoy life again thats what I'm doing the scale is just a number it's how u feel that counts !!

Doty: Ok, so you are an official member of the Turtle club! You are in good company. Join the club!!!! Its hard not to compare and not to feel like you have somehow been cheated out of the bigger weight losses even when you are playing by all of the rules. That is human nature we feel like we want to have the "bragging " rights too, and be able to show off 100lb+ losses too. But the trick is to look at how much you have accomplised in 8 months and be proud. Each of us has a different metabolism and we are predestined to lose only a certain amount of weight, and within a certain time frame. That doesn't change no matter how much anyone elses loses or doesn't lose. We are not in a race against time, or other people, we have made a life style change which will hopefully have far more reaching effects that the momentary rushes we get from what the numbers on a scale say. Start by looking at what you have accomplished rather than where you thought you would be. I am grateful that I am healthy, have had no complications, can eat most anything, and am losing at a slow and steady rate. And for now that has to be enough. Its a darn sight better than where I was a year ago ( 367- now down to about 380) Hang in there and keep up the good work. Marcy 89 pounds total lost- but only 71 since surgery.

Don't you mean that you're down to 280 Gotta give credit where credit is due! Pamela -94