Curious..(And then I rant too)

Deejay - Thank you as well for the support!

All I can say is that you aren't alone. If you've read my profile or read any of my posts, you'll know what I've been going through. I know that I am a slow loser, which really isn't that big of a deal. What's frustrating is that I have a really hard time seeing how far I've come, and can only focus on how much further I have to go. And it's even harder to see posts from people who are 9 pounds from goal or who have finally reached their "normal" BMI. I'm happy for them, but sad for me. Reading those posts makes me feel empty inside and I feel like such a traitor because the LAST thing I want to do is be supportive of someone who isn't "fat" anymore. I keep telling myself that (and others) that it's not how long it takes me to get there that counts, it's the destination that matters. Pamela 352/274/200 "content goal"

Hey Pam, I was reading your Post w/ respect to this thread on slowing losing and these negative feelings that creep up on us. I have the same darn thing going on. I'll get irritated and upset that someone who is now a size 10 is even on this board. Again, comparing myself. I do not begrudge them their success, it's awesome, it just brings up feelings of inadequacy when I have so far to go and, like you, tend to focus on how far I have to go and not how far I've come. One day at time though, can''t ask for more. Maybe if I say it enough I'll get it through my thick, stubborn head? LOL. Hugs, Tracey in SF 359/292/ one day at a time..!!!!!

Hi Michelle: I used to be more active on this board, but haven't posted in quite a while. Mostly because I haven't been doing very well with losing the weight- especially when compared to the majority of others here. First I stopped posting and just lurked, and then I stopped coming altogether. I think it made me feel worse than I already did to hear how much weight others have lost. I know people will tell you till they're blue in the face not to judge yourself against others, especially with this surgery. But it's pretty damn hard not to when there are constantly "How much weight have you lost" threads. So yes, you are not the only one frustrated with the surgery. I am also a slow loser. I had surgery 07/28/04 and I'm down -60 lbs. I was down -63 lbs. but then I went on my honeymoon to Maui, Hawaii and I gained back 3! I was really baffled how that could happen because we didn't eat much and we were very active with sight-seeing and planned activities (snorkeling, swimming, walking, hiking). But oh well, it was my honeymoon for christsake! I won't allow myself to feel bad- which is something that I felt every time I had a follow-up with my surgeon in the past. In fact, I have my 6 month follow-up next week and I am petrified to face him. At my 4 month I was only down 43 lbs. and he was not very nice to me about it. My surgeon is excellent at what he does, unfortunately while he is trained & fully qualified to perform the mechanics of the surgery, he very sensitive when it comes to interacting with his obese patients- not having been overweight a day in his life. I have a friend who told me that he has made a couple hurtful comments to her. I also believe his standards are too high. He told me at my 4 month that he expected me to be pretty much at goal or very close to it by my 6 month follow-up. Is that crazy or what?! I too am finding that I am being judged by co-workers, family, and friends- even more so now than when I was fat. Everyone feels they have the right to comment on my loss (or lack of). I get sick of it. I can understand how angry celebrities who have had WLS must feel because they are constantly being talked about negatively I am also very disenchanted with the support group I attend. I even wrote an email to the Bariatric Program Coordinator to let her know how I felt. The focus of our support group is given to pre-ops. There is extensive talk about how to overcome insurance problems, what to expect during the surgery, etc. The same information is repeated every single meeting- all pre-op info. There is no support at all for those of us in the middle. Those of us who are not yet close to goal and are struggling with slow loss. I think it was very brave of you to speak up about this. I know there are others that feel this way, especially in my support group. But they are too afraid to cast a negative light on the surgery or to be branded as a trouble-maker for not always being perky about the process. Thank you for this post! By reading the responses from others it has also given me comfort to know that I am not the only one feeling this way. Angela 229/169/135