Hard Times!!!!!

Ok you guys, I posted this right from my journal. Then I started wondering how are the other July babies are doing. Please share your thoughts, struggles, and emotions! I feel like I am a big ball of emotions right now! Ok, well it has been 11 weeks now. I just got the results of my first blood level check. My iron is a little low. So I am dragging this week a little. I took my iron today. This week is a little hard. I feel trapped on a good diet that I am ready to take a break from. ****! This has been more emotional this week. I am experiencing head hunger too, for the first time. I have found myself overeating these past two days. I know this because my pouch has begun to hurt. Ummm, I have not only felt run down from the low iron, but I have also made some bad food choices. I had a slice of pizza for the first time on Wed., I had liver and onions on thursday. The liver and onions were not too bad of a choice, but it was a little too greasy. I ended up feeling kinda queezie! Ok, emotionally I am thinking...this was a last resort...Tonia do not mess this up...gee...do not mess this up. Well, I hope next week is better. I hope I am ready to resume my diet, although I have little control in resuming it. It is like, ok...you can cheat and eat something you should not have, but that takes away from all of the stuff you are suppose to have. So now you are full, you still have close to 60 grams of protein to get in...and you feel queezie. See what I mean, a fat girls nightmare...trapped on a diet you cannot get out of. Dang, these few days were not fun, I could only eat very small amounts of cheat food...and the food contributed to my overall sluggishness....and then add in the queezie feeling too! Go figure! I could shoot anyone right now who says this is easy..... Tonia

Ummm, I posted this before I saw the hamburger question. So let me post this. I am not looking for a self-righteous answer, as in "I would never eat pizza" or "I had this surgery and I will never go into another fast food restaurant etc." MY HAT IS OFF TO YOU! And when you fall off of the wagon, and you will...because if you had to have surgery to correct your inability to make good food choice along with all of the other variables that put you in the predicament to need surgery...one day you will slip...it is part of being human. And I hope that you can come here and find support, not judgment or just inconsiderate responses. Dang people, we have all had social skills 101. If a person just told you they lost their house in a firer, your response should not be about the big house you just built and how many rooms it has! Good for you, it is just not appropriate.....start your own conversation or thread, where can talk freely about your success, without coming off as an inconsiderate, cold, unfeeling, uncompassionate, thoughtless nut case! So, do I eat fast food often. NO! This is my first fall from grace. I am looking for support, a sharing of your experiences...and how you were able to get back on that preverbal horse. Thanks in advance for your SUPPORT!

I know what u mean...one day i felt like a pig i think everything that day was hunting me to eat me,,, eat me...a bite here a bite there..i was so mad at my self... And lets not talk abt standing on the scale,,,well as of 9/29/04 i'm 2 mths out and down 38 lbs,, i wanted to be down at least 40 by now so of course when someone asked me i said 40 *****0000000 like it was the thing to do... i hated lying,, but i cldnt help it... Then i have a friend who had surgery on the same day and she lost 50 i feel jacked up u know.. Plus i'm going thur with my other half,, which makes matters even worse.. But for u and me,, yes will fall off but as long as we keep getting up we'll make it,,,tonia just dont give up... bcz i wont dana

Thanks for sharing Dana! YOu know, I started off being able to eat a sizable amount of food, approximately 4-6 ozs. So I am always conscience of how much I am eating. I cannot eat more at this time, but when I eat the wrong things...whew......it is right there...ok ms. piggy...what next! No, I am not going to give up, thanks for the encouragement. And you need to feel good about your success too! Congrats on a job well done! Tweedy

Hi Tweedy, I am DEFINITELY in no position to give you any self-righteous answers, because I AM ONLY HUMAN!!! I am almost 3 months out,and yes I actually have had a slice of pizza.So what.I couldn't eat all of the crust,so I ate the toppings.All I can say is that before surgery,it would have been 4-5 slices.So I don't beat myself up over it. I am normally really careful about what I eat,(that is IF I eat), but I think this is a learning experience for everybody.I just take it one day at a time. I don't see you as having a "fall from grace" at all. Tommorrow is another day. I haven't been to a fast food place since surgery only because my husband has my kids convinced that we should wait until I get used to this new way of life, so I don't feel left out. That is not my idea.But I would never say that I would never go into a fast food place again.Luckily now alot of places are offering better options, so I should'nt have to feel that I could never go out to eat. The only other reason I choose not to eat what I used to is because I am so afraid of the dreaded dumping syndrome. That pretty much helps me stay on track. To each his own,that's how I see it. I hope to take this a a message of support,because you have my full support. Good Luck on your journey. Denise

Tonia, I think right now, there are a lot of us in a stage where it's not always easy to choose the right foods. We're finally able to tolerate more, and honestly...who wants to eat the same thing every day, day in and day out? I almost ALWAYS eat 1oz string cheese & 1oz turkey for breakfast, a tuna sandwich for lunch (sometimes with cottage cheese on the side), chicken for dinner, and Crystal Light to drink. It's not easy! I don't know how others are, but now I am beginning to deal with physical hunger. Not all the time, but the rumblings are there at times. It's actually kind of scary, because I know that means I'm going to have to begin fighting the urge to pick whatever is convenient. Emotionally, I am doing okay. Of course, there are moments when I'm looking at the dinner leftovers and wishing I could have a second serving. Heck, I'd be happy to eat a regular sized serving! That is why the pouch has been so helpful to me...instant portion control, despite what my brain says. I still have the eyes of a fat girl, but no longer the stomach, and that is a very hard thing to overcome, but I'm lucky because I WILL dump on sugary products (did it by accident), and really greasy foods make me queasy. I think you've made the first step in getting yourself back on track. You've admitted that you're having problems, and you are aware that you need to deal with them. Do you have to be perfect? No one's perfect! You shouldn't beat yourself up over it, either, because that guilt is something we've dealt with every time we ate something pre-op. Remember that no matter how bad some of your days are right now, they can't ever be as bad as they were before surgery. You're going to be all right...just take it one meal at a time, and you'll get there. Pamela 352/309/135ish

Thanks for your support Pamela! See, I am just like you that I have this fixed plan of what I am suppose to be eating each day. Well I have had a personal trainer/nutrionist for a few months now. She put me on a really good eating plan, I have losted 72lbs to date, so I am very happy, but my typical diet is as follows: Breakfast: 1/4 cup of oatmeal (7:00am) 1 1/2 hours later: Protein Shake (8:30am) Snack: 1/4 cup of Yoguart with 2 table spoons of oatmeal (11:30 pm) Lunch: 1/4 cup of raw veggies (lettuce only with 1 oz of cheese) 3ozs of tuna Dinner: 1/4 cup of veggies (fresh) 3ozs of either chicken, turkey, or fish NO fruit after noon, no gatorade the 14 grams of suger is too much (according to my trainer...also the sugar in natural fruit is too much after about noon). I do water and diet splash throughout the day. Mind you, I have lost an average of 5lbs a week for the last few weeks. But I got sick of eating this. I have had tuna for the last 4 weeks straight for lunch I will modify it for next week, so I have all new things...but I can identify! Oh, also...with my bad food choices this week, I also observed a decrease in my weightloss....only 2lbs, but hey...I will take it! Oh and yes, I think that my food indiscretions are really not that bad, it was one slice of pizza...shoot...presurgery...I could have eaten....about 8 slices. Again thanks for your support! Tweedy

Tweedy, I know this is off the subject but HOW did u manage tuna for a week???? When you say 2TBS of oatmeal in your yogurt-are u putting uncooked oats? unflavored? How does it taste .... You have lost soo much and I can see why you are just so ..... If you have any more helpful diet plans I'd love to hear them......

Hey Doll, I have enlisted the help of a personal trainer/nutritionist. This has really helped me to find my way, when I go astray... Anyway, she put me on this plan...where she cut out fruits, for now....she wanted to limit all sugar. The oatmeal keeps you very regular!!!! So I do plan oat meal (cooked) with splenda and that butter spray (that is not really butter). Then for snack, I mix in dry plain oats into any flavor yogurt (blueberry and strawberry are my favorites). Oh and tuna....ummmmm I did well for 12 weeks on tuna...and I feel like I have developed a taste aversion for it. I just cannot eat it right now. So I have switched to another fish, talapia is my new best friend for a while. Tweedy

First and foremost - QUIT KICKING YOURSELF.... Second - Anyone who posts or emails you that they "Always follow the rules" or "Never steered from the right path" etc.etc. are either full of s*** or they are not LIVING THEIR LIFE. Third - and this is what I have done in my journey (which began on 7/15 and I have lost right at 60 pounds in that period - so doing something right) You need to sit down with yourself and decide what foods/drinks you simply can NOT live without - Do not think about if they have protein, if they are carbs, if they are not really healthy - Just ask yourself what foods/drinks bring you joy. Then - incorprorate those items into your life in moderation (We are stuck w/ being able to generally only do things in moderation!!!) Fourth - On the days you don't make your protein intake, forget your vitamins, don't get all your water, eat french fries, etc. - Go to bed at night and forget ABOUT IT. Tomorrow is a new day - start that day new and try to do your best. I personally REFUSE to be a slave to counting protein grams, counting water intake, avoiding carbs, etc.etc. Maybe some people are happy with that anal a lifestyle - I however, have found that I need to "tweak" the rules given to me to fit my life. I have had to try - and realized I can' tolerate some food items - but you know what - I tried them - I did NOT allow someone else to dictate "You can't eat that"...I learned on my own. Remember - tomorrow is a nother day. Anne 260/198/150