Why all the drama?
Hello Everyone,
O.K. where do I begin, my surgery date is scheduled for July 6th, my boyfriend just found a new job (I am happy) however we have a very ACTIVE 2 year old that he 's suppose to take care of while I am in the hospital, My mom say's she will be able to drop her off and pick he up for the 3-4 days that I am in the hospital,(I have been extremely poitive up until now) God forbid the stay is longer I pray that it's not(still being positive) what the heck do I do? i've even thought about trying to move the surgery up but I don't think I have enough time, Oh my mom works in a school so even though were off for the summer, she begins work again on the July 6th, I just feel like I am inconveniencing everyone, he even asked me what do I want him to do, should he not take the job? I told him to tell his boss that he had something planned prior to accepting the offer and see what he says. He even asked if I wanted to wait until next year I politely said, HELL NO! Am I being selfish, I feel like my child is my responsibility and thats really it. HELP!!!!! Encouragement needed!!!!
Your boyfriend could explain to his new boss that you are having surgery (without going into detail). Even new bosses can be understanding at times, although he may have to take an occurance (or whatever his job uses). It sounds like you have the first few days covered, and most likely, that is all you will need. Do you have any other family or friends nearby that you could ask to be on standby "just in case?" You could also look into a daycare that allows children to "drop in" for a week or so...the one I worked at allowed it.
Normally, our children come first. But there is a point in your life when you have to do something for yourself, which inevitably helps your child. In my opinion, the worst thing that you can do is to have your boyfriend turn down a job. In this day and age, jobs aren't easy to find, especially ones that pay more than minimum wage with benefits. Now, if he's going to be working for McDonalds, that's another story!
Hope this helps!
Hi Lakisha, I agree with the 1st post, it would not be too difficult for your boyfriend to talk to his supervisor and see if they can arrange his schedule to fit in your surgery. Maybe he can take turns with mom? Mom watch the baby opposite when boyfriend is scheduled? It is not selfish of you to continue on with your surgery date. You are doing this because it is medically necessary and you have gone through so much just to get a date! Don't give up now! Can baby's other grandparents help? Allison
Don't worry about it being too much drama! We all have to deal with sh*** when it comes around. Thank God that he found a job. That should make your future situation a bit easier. You may have a tough time for 2-4 weeks but after that sounds like you will be in a better situation. Moms are there to help. They do love our children. The high school suggestion is great. It probably would make some young gals summer to have a few bucks to buy new school clothes. If you are part of a church mention it to your pastor or minister. Sometimes people from the church can pull together to help a family in need. Also, you might ask the social worker at your hospital for suggestions - that's what they are there for.
You are most important right now!!!! Your daughter, your boyfriend and your mom will make it through the few days or weeks of rearranging. Hey! We have a very important date and we can't be late!!!! Its time to get on with your independence. Me too! We are same day surgery buddies. I am lucky that my mom is totatlly into my 9 year old and my 19 year old won't leave my side. He has just graduated college and he won't leave me even to take a new job he has been offered. Such a mommy's boy - guess I did something right.
See you on the other side of the fence - in the looser's lounge as they say in poker!!!!
LaKisha,
Ask your self the simple question. If your boyfriend was having surgery what would you do? I take it you two live together? If so, when he committed to you, he committed to your child. It is his responsibility too now. You came as a package deal, there is no separation. If he wants you then he has got to understand that your child is part of the relationship. If you let him off the hook, you are selling out your own child. This will surely be a test of the man he really is. Good Luck and God Bless You. margaret
This very well may be a test of how much your man is dedicated to your child and to you. Your Mom seems to be willing to help, let her and as far as church or high schools that was a really good idea. don't give up and have YOUR surgery. I too am haveing surgery on the same day at UC, Good luck and don't give up the fight.
GodBless
Traci
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