He left me all alone!!!!!!

I'm days away from my surgery (july 1) and things could not be any worse me. I've been riding this up and down roller coaster of emotions. One min. I'm happy the next I'm crying. And now my husband has walked out on me. I'm afraid to go through with the surgery all alone. My kids are to young, twins 11 and 12 old. I'm trying to find ways I can go ahead with the surgery even if I hire someone to help me. But my deepest fear is being alone through this. My God, he could not wait a few more weeks! He is the one that called me names and would not make love to me. Please if you can help me through this your input matters.

Suzy, I'm so sorry for all that you are going through. My surgery is also July 1st and I can't imagine going through this too. If you can find someone to help you out with the kids, Iwould definitely try to go through with it now more than ever. You will feel SO much better about yourself at a healthy weight and you need some confidence after a split up like this. Do you know of a reason for his leaving? I hope it all works out to the best for you. I will certainly be thinking of you on July 1st. Let us know what you decide. Lisa H.

Suzy, No matter how find a way to go threw with this surgery!! Your weight has probably been his control factor over you for years and the surgery is a huge threat to him as a "MAN" because now other people will pay attention to you and his just being there would no longer be enuf to keep YOU AROUND FOR HIM!! You stand strong and proud... Your kids will be able you enjoy a renewed Mom that can go and go and play and play and still have time for that new man in her life that she so deserves... My heart is with you, as well as my prayers. Let go and Let God !!! Kelly

Suzy, Im sorry your going through this. But keep a positive outlook picture him seeing you in six months new, thin and sexy. HIS LOSS. Do what you can and have the kids help too. Make them feel like there involved. Stock up on easy meals for them or prepare it for a week so that all they have to do is heat and serve. This is now the time to do it and make him eat his heart. Good Luck and keep me posted. Jeannie

OH MY! He is not a real man! I wish I could come through this computer and . Please know u will get through this and we are all here for yoU! Keep u r chin up! (((((((((((SUZY))))))))))))

Hi Suzy, Let him GO. You will be so much better without him. Right now you are hurting and in shock at him leaving. Revenge is so sweet. Go on with your new life. Just have the surgery and find someone who truly loves you for you, not one who was so controlling that you scared him to death by going to have this surgery. It's so easy to tell someone what to do with their life when something like this happens. Everyone has an opinion. But we know you are hurting on the inside real bad. And if you feel like you need more time before you have your surgery, I'm sure your surgeon can reschedule you for a later date. You need your mind in a clear mode for this surgery. Otherwise you can make yourself very sick afterwards. Keep us informed, we do care. Do you go to a support group where you live? Maybe they can help you. Jean

Oh Suzy G. I am so sorry to hear of your husband walking out on you! I can't imagine how anyone could do this at very crucial time in your life... I too am having my surgery on July 26, 2004. This is when your family and friends are to be your source of support... Please feel free to email me.. I am a fellow Californian and would love to offer my support to you

Suzy, My jaw hit the floor when I read your post. What a bum! I'm sure this is just another control issue. I pray that you find a way to go through surgery. You need to be healthy and find a happier life. If this is the way this man treats you, walking out on you when you need him most, then you are far better off without him. Your kids need you.......a healthy and happy Mom. Don't be his doormat any longer!! My heart goes out to you! Big Hugs!!! Denise

Suzy, My heart goes out to you, I agree with the other posters about going ahead with the surgery. You deserve to be healthy, your kids deserve a healthly mom and I feel it's important that you do something for yourself. As far as the jerk that walked out on you. As crazy as this may seem in the end it's a blessing that he left. My twin sister went through a similar situation. He would have never been happy. In my sisters case, he called her names, wouldn't touch her, etc when she was heavy. She lost 100lbs and then he was constantly accusing her of sleeping with other people. As far as emotions, if you feel like crying go ahead. Even though the guy sounds like a jerk you obliviously cared about this individual and you'll need to grieve your lost. My suggestions would be; if you have a good relationship with your family lean on them, from personal experience they won't mind. If you have faith, use it. It can really help what seems like an impossible situation. Keep in contact with your friends (even if it's short phone calls) Seek help if you feel like your suffering from depression and most importantly be good to yourself, sounds like you were in an abusive situation so you definately need some warm fuzzies . I hope this helps and make sure and keep us updated. Sandy

Congratulations you lost some dead weight ahead of your surgery date! Seriously though, I realize this has to be the hardest time for you. What was he so afraid of in this surgery that he had to make you feel so bad right now? He is concerned that maybe you will leave him after you are lighter -so he beat you to the punch???? We all as mothers are willing to do whatever for our children - even die for them. But now you need to be willing to live for them. I am a few days behind you on the schedule - my date is July 6th. I have 3 sons, my youngest is age 9. I have asked my husband so stay home because he only causes me headaches and I don't want him around to mess me up in my recovery. You are a stronger woman than you realize. You have made this difficult decision. You have beautiful children to live for. He may have been the hottest man in the world but obviously after what he did to you - he was not the best. I will be thinking of you on the first. Please be strong for yourself and your kiddos. If you are involved with a church talk to your priest or pastor. Many times they can find someone to help you. Also, you might contact the social worker at the hospital where you are having surgery. Please oh please don't cancel. You are worth it!!!!