Updates

Okay, everyone...time to check in!

Still no baby, and it's starting to look like there may never be. I had my 4th IUI today, and my doctor has changed protocol just a bit. I have to take prometrium and an HCG booster. I only had one egg. If I am not pregnant this time around, I will have another HSG to look at my uterus again. If all is well, we're supposed to move on to injectible drugs (instead of clomid), but if we can't afford the drugs, then we're done. DH says we can always try naturally (we've been using donor sperm to avoid passing on his genetic disorder), and I suppose that EVENTUALLY, it might happen. At this point, my insides are all black and I have no hope left. It's scary to think that this might be the end of the road for me, and that leaves me with a big empty hole in my heart. I always wanted more than one baby... My weight is the same. I haven't seen 215 again, and I've been hovering around 220 for the most part. I've been so wrapped up in this infertility mess that NOTHING else has mattered...not even the child I DO have. I really need to get myself back in order, and I'm guessing that means I'll need a shrink and some antidepressants. I'm a mess. Bruised, battered, and defeated. But maybe 2007 will turn around for me, baby or no baby. Sorry for the whining, I'm just really out of sorts right now.

Oh Pam, I'm so sorry to hear about your struggles. Hang in there and don't give up! As for me, well I'm engaged, woohoo so life is awesome right now from that stand point. From a eating stand point well I'm struggling. It seems for me one day, I'm not hungry then the next, its like I'm always hungry. It's very frustrating. And of course with the holidays and everyone brings all that stuff into the office that for a food addict like me, is sometimes just too tempting. I am resolving right now to get a hold of myself in the new year. I resolve to get on a regular exercise plan and stick with it. I'm great at starting one, just not following through. That's GOT to change. I also resolve to just try to plan ahead more. My problem I think is mostly lack of planning ahead, so then my food options aren't as good as they could be. I also resolve to go back to journaling what I eat. So here's to us, we've had many struggles, but we have the ability to have even more success if we just stick together and encourage one another! So here's to us! We can do it!! We've come this far.......we need to cross the finish line!! Happy New Year all my wonderful July friends!!! Michelle