I think I am in trouble
you guys ever notice that I never post post anything on the topics of what did you eat today? Well.............
I think I am becoming anorexic
I am taking in about 300 calories a day. I am focused on getting in my water and food takes a back burner. (Remember when I was fainting last month??)
When I do it eat it is very little. No one really knows the extent of what's going on... I keep explaining that my stomach is the size of a shot glass. I accidentally went 3 days without any food. I am getting scared because my hair is thinning and my color is pale. I thought the protein bullets were helping but they are not. I changed my hair color so no one would be able to tell my hair is thining....I put on a façade to everyone who knows me. I find myself Almost at the fainting stage on a daily basis.
I look in the mirror and don't see what others are seeing, I still see my self as really big. I Even went to the store tonight and put 2x shirts in my cart and bought them. It wasn't until I got home that my husband pointed out that I bought the wrong size.
Am I in trouble? Because of my self image? I am afraid of telling the doctors because I have already been in the hospital several times. Next time it happens.. I was told and threatened with a feeding tube and or reversing my surgery.
I find myself emotionally unstable and always crying. I never thought I would become someone that doesn't eat because I have always loved my food. I think thats why I have not lost any weight in 3 weeks because I quit eating.
I never thought I would be admitting this to anyone .. But I have grown to care about each and every one of you and I hope you don't think badly of me. I mentioned this to my NUT last time I was in the hospital and he put me on anti-deppresents. Am I depressed? IS that why I am not eating>?
Help me I am getting really scared.
I'm so sorry you are feeling like this *hug* I have been feeling pretty much the same way...if it weren't for my husband (who had the surgery last year) than I would go without eating also, in fact I truly only get about 1 maybe 2 meals in a day. And my doctor doesn't have me on protein shakes, and they've had me off all my vites since the middle of July...But anyway, I feel you might be depressed, I've noticed myself depressed a lot lately. I think you should either talk to you RD, DR, or speak with a chaplain or therapist you trust (I should practice what I preach). Either way I will keep you in my prayers and I know it will get better soon for you, hang in there!
Val honey, just by posting this you are admitting you have a problem. That is a huge step. the counselor who did my psych eval was at an eating disorder clinic and told me I might need/want to come back for follow up appts. post op. Did you go to someone like that?
I really think you should see a behavior therapist. You know what they say, we didn't get a lobotomy, we ALL have food issue to deal with! But yours could really be impacting your health.
Please be upfront with your doctor. I would think it is way too early for them to seriously be considering reversing your surgery, but you need protein, and you need to be healthy.
Take care and let us know. We care about you! judi
Valarie,like Judy said I really think you need some help,and I don't think they would do a revision yet.
This surgery can throw off everything in us behavior,hormones,everything.But you really need to talk to someone who can help you with your health,before it goes to far and you can't get help.
You are a beautiful person and yes we all do love you on here but you really need to talk to the dr.
You have to do this for your children,husband AND YOURSELF and the sooner the better!
Of course we don't think badly of you,and you just might have inspired others by posting this.
PLEASE LET US ALL KNOW HOW YOU MAKE OUT!
(((((((((((love you girl)))))))))))) take care of yourself
Big hugs! I definitely think you should find someone to talk to. Even if its a psychologist. They won't be able to tell your dr unless you give them permission and they can help you work through this. Maybe setting a timer to remind yourself to eat would help? Even if its just a couple bites, you need something to help keep your body running. Keep posting here and we'll support you as much as we can!
Val, I agree with what the other girls posted.
Since I don't have feelings of hunger, I eat by the clock. Try setting a timer or alarm. I eat something after my coffee in the AM then I eat at noon and again at 6-6:30 PM.
And PS I rarely post on the what did you eat today either!
You can do this sweetie, we are all here to support you. ((hugs))
Honey, it takes a lot of courage to admit that there is a problem and that is the first step in solving it. We care about you over here and want you happy and healthy. You had this surgery to improve your health, so now it is time to take the next step. You should really talk to a therapist or get some kind of counselling. As everyone here has already said, the surgery gave you a smaller stomach, but didn't cure whatever issues you had with food previously. We've all heard the phrase "trading one addiction for another". That is a real thing and we ALL need to be on the lookout for the signs of it in ourselves. I don't necessarily believe that anti-depressants will help anything (but I'm a strong believer in as little medicating as possible). Hiding what is going on and putting on a happy face for everyone is only hurting yourself sweetie. Please take care of you before it gets too far out of hand. Shoot me a pm if you want and I can give you my number if you want to talk. Love ya!
Donna
Yes please be careful. I was anorexic/bulemic in high school. It can really mess you up! Please talk to your doctor and ask him if he can refer you to someone you can talk to. We're all going through major changes and it's easy to be sucked in by the feeling of success we have when we see the weight coming off. It's easy to trade bad habits for new bad habits. Please take care of yourself and know that we all love you girl!
***hugs***
Michelle