I found this on another board (its cute)
You Know You Are A WLS Patient When:
1. "I have a date" doesn't mean you are going out.
2. "I'm a loser" is a good thing.
3. "Welcome to the other side" does not mean you have died.
4. New clothes fall off the next week.
5. You are excited about "hand me downs"
6. YOU have a NEW family!
7. Hitting the "Century Mark" is a good thing!
8. You love the taste of Chewable Centrum Rugrats Vitamins or biting the head off of Wilma.
9. People start calling you tiny, and it's a good thing.
10. When the word lap has nothing to do with a strip club!!
11. When "No, I couldn't eat another bite" really has a deeper meaning!
12. When they look at you resentfully in the plus size store because you really don't belong there anymore!
13. When you have to prove you are you on your license!
14. When you start hogging the camera space and loving the pictures!
15. You want to hug everyone who is fat and give them your surgeon's card.
16. You are never without a bottle of water.
17. When people look surprised when they see how little you eat.
18. When you know all too well the definition of "dumping".
19. When you can see your feet for the first time in years!!
20. When you order a doggy bag the same time you order your meal.
21. When you count protein grams instead of calories.
22. You say "Oh, I won't have any of that, I'm full" and really mean it.
23. When the only way your nipples are where they belong is to roll them up, position them in your bra & secure them with a pony-tail holder!!! (sorry for the visual guys!)
24. Having your husband say, "Honey, I can put my arm (not arms) all the way around you!!"
25. When you go to the mall and you park in the first open space instead of circling for 20 minutes for a spot by the door.
26. You go out on a date and are really truly a "Cheap date" and not in the way that some think.....
27. When one drink makes you a flipping floozy...
28. When you run you don't hear a flapping noise.....oh wait you still do.....but at least you are running!
29. When your husband takes your breath away in a moment of passion...but not because he is squishing your tummy!
30. You feel like you have over eaten after eating half a cup of something.
31. Vitamins and calcium etc. feel like a meal.
32. When the chef comes out from the kitchen and asks you "what's the matter, don't you like the meal?"
33. You've just lost 100 pounds, and someone who hasn't seen you in a while says .... "Gee, did you change your hairstyle?"
34. When you bend over and see daylight through your thighs.
35. You can cross your legs.
36. When you ask for a sample in the deli section of a grocery store and that's your meal.
37. When you say, "I just got these clothes last week and they're already too big!"
38. Trying to cash a check and the teller says, "That's not you!"
39. Instead of the "Wonder Bra" you need a "Wonder Where They Went Bra."
40. You walk into a store and see all the weight loss products and know you will never need to buy them again.
41. When you walk by a mirror and say to yourself "Who is that girl?"
42. When people take a double look at you.
43. When you go out for the evening and feel like Cinderella.
44. When your shoe size shrinks and you start buying shoes that tie.
45. When the steering wheel in your car no longer cuts off the circulation in your tummy area.
46. When you drop food, it no longer lands on your boobs, but actually lands in your lap.
47. You can avoid the handicap stalls in public restrooms because you can now "fit" in a regular stall.
48. The thought of fitting into an airline seat no longer sends you into a panic attack.
49. When your able to tuck a blouse into your pants.
50. When you are excited to be able to go to the thrift shops and get your dressy clothes.
51. When the flight attendant doesn't reach for the seat belt extender, and you can sit by the window.
52. When people actually "see" you and talk to you, and not through you like you are invisible.
53. When you order a child's meal, and take half of it home in a doggie bag.
54. When checking for leaks doesn't mean looking at your panties!!!
55. When your spandex shorts are used for *JOGGING*, and not merely as an anti-chaffing between-the-thighs-shielding-device.
56. When your exercise equipment isn't just for drying your fine washables anymore.
57. When your child or grandchild wants to sit on your lap-and they really can!
58. When your boyfriend/spouse starts gaining weight because of eating your leftovers.
59. When you can run up a flight of stairs and don't have to stand there for 10 minutes to catch your breath.
60. You can't wait to wake up and start your day.
61. Your butt gets tired of sitting because you have no padding.
62. You go out to eat and ask if anyone wants to split a kids meal.
63. When people you know but haven't seen since before surgery DON'T know you!
64. Having to get a new driver's license because you FINALLY weigh less that what you've lied about for years!
65. You are actually bold enough to admit your weight, and even post it on the internet!!!
66. You can eat 1/4 of a chicken breast and feel like you just finished Thanksgiving dinner.
67. You actually look forward to stepping on a set of scales!
68. You are not embarrassed of anything that you have in your cart at the supermarket!
69. When you're no longer embarrassed to tell people you weigh 200 pounds (and that you weighed over 300).
70. When you will tell complete strangers intimate details of your toileting experiences.
71. Being able to hang clothes in the closet without them falling off the hanger.
72. Exercise is a good thing.
73. You leave Costco feeling like you've left an all you can eat buffet (all those free samples!).
74. When you call Lane Bryant and Catherines and ask them to take you off their list and cancel your credit card.
75. When you spend a day in your room trying on clothes you shoved to the back of the closet/dresser.
76. You buy 3 Lean Cuisines a week...and that's your total groceries.
77. Your rings keep spinning around your fingers.
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