Dawn, I'm glad to see you have found us and believe me you are not alone. Many of us have gained in the past year. I too have had major changes in my life, left ex of 7 years and have recently married. I have gained 40 pounds. I also had a dear friend have surgery and also do as you have done. So I understand your situation so well. I'm glad to hear God brought you back where you are meant to be and hope that your life is much better now. As far as the willpower and drive... I have tried several times to get back on the wagon and it just didn't work. I woke up one day last week and realized that this month is my 3 year anniversary, looked in the mirror and didn't like what I saw. So I finally decided that noone was going to work my wonderful tool for me and I had to be responsible for what I do from this point on. I do not want to be 313 pounds again and have found the drive to do this. I know I have to remain positive and go back to what I was doing right after surgery. I think my biggest help is having others that have had surgery to talk to and get through this together. I am online all day at work if you need to chat. [email protected] Hugs, Shelley

Hi Dawn. Nice to meet you. You will have the support and understanding here. No judgements. I gained a lot more, 90 pounds and am so ashamed of myself. I got banded almost a month ago and am getting a fill tomorrow. We'll see how it goes. I don't want to be 384 pounds again. Life is too good! Hugs Lucy

Hi Lisa. I appreciate your message. I paid for the lap band because I didn't want to wait for approval. I was gaining steadily and in large amounts. I am so ashamed and embarrassed about myself. I am getting my first fill tomorrow and will keep in touch here on the board. I miss everyone. It seems like we all just faded away! Hugs, Lucy

man, am i glad to see all of you! ..ive been lurking around here for about a week now and havent been around since about 6 months out. i am 36 years old and had the RNY on 02/16/05. Since then ive been on a roller coaster, not as bad as before surgery but i have to say its been a bit of a wild ride. my highest weight and on the day of surgery i was 291#, today i am at 198# and in a size (tight) 12. in mid 2006 i was at my lowest weight ever of 168# and in a size 10 (almost 8) ..ive had some pretty drastic life changes since surgery and not all in just my size ..i went through what i think was a mini mid-life crisis..i even got to the point that i left my family..my kids..my husband of almost 19 years..i was "LOST" ..i am glad to say that God brought me home and ive been home with my family since April of 2007..ive also gained ..omg..i cant even believe it..a whomping 30#. i am scared to death..even though im at a size that i wasnt even at in high school, i know i could be smaller..i have this amazing tool and i cant seem to find the drive and willpower i had when i first had this surgery..please tell me im not alone and please give me any advice you may have ..i need help. thanks for being here, im glad to see there are some recent posts on this board and look forward to hearing from you all. my thoughts and prayers with all -hugs- dawn RNY 02/16/05 (pre-op)291/(lowest)168/(current)198/(goal)170

Lucy, I hope that everything goes well for you. Please keep in touch to let us all know how you are doing. I think part of the reason we haven't post (for me anyways) is that I am so busy. When I first had the surgery I was in a different job, more time to get on the computer and a little bit more active, now I am in an office setting and doing a lot of paperwork. But yes, it is hard to talk about it when your gaining the weight back and no longer loosing. It is still hard for me today, when people tell me that I look great and that I look as if I am still loosing. I have told a few of them no, I have gained back some. But we are all doing the right things now becasue here we are back again! Best of luck to everyone. ; - ) Sandy