TWO YEARS POST OP

Two years ago today I was in the QEII hospital after having my surgery weighing approx. 555 lbs. suffering from low oxygen due to not having my C-Pac machine. After it was located, I proceeded to sleep through the night. I awoke the next morning wanting to walk since I was told walking would eliminate getting blood clots. I was hounding the nurses continually to help me walk in the hall as I needed help getting out of bed. The nurses told my mother I was being a nuisance (those who know me know this sounds like me). After 2 years of living as a normal sized person (225 ish), I have come to realize that the mental part of this is much harder than the eating part as being a 2X since Grade 11 (1983), I am now below that....wearing large and xl. I no longer have to shop at the Big and Tall shops. I actually enjoy exercise now. It's no longer a chore. I don't get out of breath anymore or sweat profusely. I never thought I would see that. At 555, you would have thought I had run a marathon when I had just crossed the street. I have definitely been given a new lease on life. I would never want to go back to where I was. I have also come to realize that my upbringing helped make me bigger and I have taken steps to help with that problem by working a 12 step program that has made me realize it is most important to love myself before anyone else can love me. This is something I came to realize after watching, above all things, an Oprah show where she had 3 individuals who had gastric bypass surgery ...one who turned to alcohol to replace the food, another that turned to sex to replace food and the 3rd being Carnie Wilson who also turned to alcohol. I have read all of her books and I look at her as an idol in this weight loss journey. Thank God for Oprah's show! I realize that this surgery is not the be all and end all...food is something I'm going to have to deal with the rest of my life and I also know that it can backfire if I allow it. To anyone that is waiting for this surgery or has recently had it, please do not look at this as something you do and not work at it......it will not work if you do. It is not a magic pill....you have to work at it. The old saying no pain-no gain certainly comes into play here.

Congrats, Robert, on all of the self analyzation and progress that you've made during these last 2 years. It sounds like you've done wonderfully! I, too, saw that Oprah show. I think many of the post ops have seen it. I understand what she's talking about, with the replacement addictions. I just wish that she would show a couple of the stories of people who have had the surgery, kept the weight off, worked on themselves, and didn't have horrible things happen to them. It's not that she's wrong, but it seemed not to be a balanced perspective. I hope the next two years will be as productive and sensational as the last two. I look forward to hearing where you're at over the next few years. Blessings, Kerri

I totally understand the mental stuff. I am dealing with some major fear issues when it comes to food. I am afraid of it now! I still love it and crave bad food, but am terrified of gaining and throw up alot after I eat. My stomach knots up and hurts and I can't seem to keep much down. Don't have a therapist in my area that deals with eating disorders, so I don't know where to go to deal with this, but maybe a 12 step would be a good idea for me too. Wendy