Happy Mothers Day & AT GOAL!!!!!

Hope everyone is having a happy mother's day! I reached my personal goal of 125 today!!! I AM EXACTLY ONE HALF THE PERSON I WAS A YEAR AGO!!! As most of you know, I started increasing my eating and calories to start trying to maintain since I was so close to goal, knowing that I would still probably lose. To my surprise, eating more made the last few pounds come off FASTER!! So now here I am AT my goal and trying to figure out what to do to stay here. A small piece of my mind says that when i ate less, I didn't lose...so maybe I should do that.... but the smarter part says "duh! you can't do that!" So, I will continue on eating more and more often to try to figure out what the balance is. This is the first time in my entire life that eating more and more often was EVER a SOLUTION to something! What a delicate line to walk! This is the pivotal point where i have to learn to NOT become an anorexic...and NOT to regain. This is the beginning of a whole new phase in this journey. I'm excited and scared all at the same time....and very cognizant of the new challenges and what i want. Hugs, Pam

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY PAM! and how wonderful to have made your personal goal on such a wonderful ocasion! all the best and hope your day is great hugs~~~ lisa xoxo

Happy Mother's Day to you, too Pam! Congratulations on making yoiur goal. That's soooo cool! I hope you have a wonderful day. I'm hoping that next year at this time I , too, will be a mom of more than the 4-legged variety! I'm so happy for you! Hugs, Kerri

Kerri, I too hope that I'm a mother at this time next year and that I will have reached my weightloss goal - I'm not totally sure what that is other than being happy and healthy. I have had two boyfriends in my entire life. One was very serious but we were too young and I was still in college. The other ended up being married (which was a surprise) and broke my heart and self esteem - long shameful story. I ended up ballooning to over 300 pounds after that. Anway, what I'm trying to say is that I don't date at all. I can't even remember the last time I've had a date. I'm hoping that by losing some weight and feeling better about myself that I'll be up for dating or even attracting a man. I get told by women all the time that I'm pretty but never have attracted men. Too bad I'm not a lesbian. Ha! - I hope that didn't offend you. I want a child really bad. I even went to a fertility clinic last summer to see about getting donor sperm. He said I needed to lose 50 pounds. I was almost 300 at the time. I gained 40 pounds after that visit. I guess that was Gods way of saying don't do it. I got my answer. I'm still not ruling out that route but would really rather do it the right way. Heck, I might be too old anyway. I'll be 40 July 25th. Yikes! I'm not against adopting but just can't afford it. I really can't afford daycare on my own either. I have always wanted to adopt or even be a foster parent. I just don't know. I'm going to focus on getting healthy the next six months and then I'm going to seriously look into my options. I have sooooo much love to give and have a really big heart. Sometimes I think if I didn't have so much time on my hands I wouldn't be so depressed. I truly think I'd be a great mother. I'm so sorry if I'm being a pain by always e-mailing you - we are strangers. Weird huh? You just seem like the neatest person and I feel myself opening up to you. Let me know if I'm overstepping. I don't know anyone that has been 300 pounds and doesn't have children - 2 very big issues for me. It is hard for a lot of people to relate to. Well, I'll stop rambling now. I truly hope you have a good week. By the way, you are going to be proud of me. I'm finally in a snug size 16 pants and extra large shirt - no more plus size shirts for me. I weighed 185.5 today. Other than having a wide rear end I'm starting to look really good. It feels so nice and a little strange. I'm sure you're dealing with that now too. Dawn

Dawn, Have you considered being a foster mother? I did it and ended up adopting two more kids! I already had two, but I couldnt let go of the two that I had in foster care for two years. If the parents lose their rights and no on wants them in their immediate family ( which happens ALOT) the ask the foster parent to adopt. I personally know one lady who ended up adopting 3 babies this way, all from the same mother! And they came to her as newborns. You can request any age range and any race. I personally wasn't picky I said not over 12 and any race. I ended up with a 6 year old and a 3 year old white boys, who look exactly like my brother who passed away! It was a God thing. It is a wonderful way to parent, and you can be a great parental influence on children that go back to there families too. It is good practice. You also can go to adoptuskids.org and see kids already in the adoption process so you can skip the fostering all together. You can also call your local family independence agency and ask about adopting foster kids. You would be amazed at all the kids needing good homes, and it sounds like you have alot of love to give. Please don't give it away to just any man to get married and just get pregnant. You are too precious to do that. Any questions about this you can email me and we can chat. Wendy

YOU GO, GIRLFRIEND!!! and a very happy mothers day to you too! i hope you enjoyed your day! yup, here comes the fun part, MAINTAINING! i feel like my mind is doing better now. i have been right at about 116 now for about a week, not getting upset (or obsessed) about the scale not moving. but TOM is visiting, so i do secretly hope to drop a lb or 2 when he leaves! LOL i would love to see 110, even if i didn't stay there, just so i could say i lost HALF of me since surgery! i do think 110 would probably be too thin, but who knows. i do know that i haven't increased my food or calorie intake and i still seem to be maintaining 115-116, so will just go with the flow. i hope you don't lose much more, because if YOU become anorexic, then i have to do it, too! your BMI is already lower than mine now, darn you! gain a lb back, would ya? i am so proud of you. if there is one thing to be happy about, focus on all you have accomplished this past year and be proud!!! love ya!

I have the hardest time not getting jealous about you guys already being at goal. You all look so good. I want to be there with ya. It seems like just yesterday that we were talking about what we could eat at Wendys and Taco bell - chili & beans. YUM!!! Remeber that? I wish that was all I could eat now - actually no I don't. That was a pretty miserable time. I didn't know what to do with myself since I couldn't eat. But I do wish I couldn't eat as much as I do now. I'm at 185.5 right now. I would be very surprised if I was able to get much lower than 150. I'm really just not losing much anymore. I'm very proud of myself for coming this far but would be so disappointed if I don't lose enough to be considered a normal weight. Right now I'm still obese. Thats the pitts!! 5 more pounds to go to be overweight. I do wish you the best. You are an inspiration even if I get a little envious at times. You are proof that it can be done. Take care of yourself. Dawn

Belated Happy Mother's Day! What a present for you. Congrats! I know this will be hard for you to figure out what to do... I am looking forward to that now, but I know once I get there, I'll be in the same boat. Good luck to you. You can do it Pam!

Pam, I hope your day was wonderful. You deserve it! Isn't it funny how we all lose so differently? I still have 18 lbs. to go to my goal of 135 lb. and my BMI is 27. And, I am 5'3"!! It really isn't in the numbers though. Most of my friends will be happy at 150-165lb. when they are done and will look great. I have people tell me all the time that I look just right and don't need to lose any more weight. How is that possible at 153 lb. at 5' 3"?? I guess it is all in how you carry the weight, your age, BMI, metabolism, where you started from, etc. So, you guys, stop comparing yourselves!! We have all accomplished so much, look and feel so much better. We are all doing GREAT!!!! Hugs! Jo

Pam, WOW that is just awesome hun.... Congrats!!! You should be so proud of yourself.... I know from getting close to my surgeons goal that it is scary to stop losing or stop shooting for losing weight. I know for myself I have always been in the diet or lsoing mode, always trying to lose......never to maintain and that is scary to me now so I can only imagine how you are feeling hun.....~Hugs~ I wish you all the best and keep us posted... Debra P