my father past away and food

hi, my father past away last saturday. he fought hard for a year with accute myloid luekemia. it has been so HARD WITH FOOD. sometimes i dont eat all day then all of the sudden i have the big urge to gorge myself. other times i just seem like i eat all the time. i know its emotional eating. plus there has been alot of food coming in so that does not help. please help... tina

Hi Tina, I am so sorry to hear about your dad but just remember that he is peaceful now. I am also an emotional eater so during this difficult time, go out and fill your house with SF Jello, SF Popcycles and SF Fudgecycles and String Cheese, things like that so when you get the urge to eat, it will be good stuff. Again, my prayers and love are with you. I lost both my parents so I understand how hard it is. Hugs, Esther

Tina-- I am so sorry to hear about your Father...but at least he is not fighting anymore. Death isn't a bad thing for those who leave us...it's a bad thing for those of us that are left behind. He is rejoicing now...try to keep that in mind. Also--I don't know your Father, of course, but I can't imagine that he would want you to sabotage yourself with food as you grieve for him. Please try to be conscious of what you are doing...but also, don't be too hard on yourself. We are all still LEARNING new habits--and when times are tough...it's human nature to revert back to what's easiet and what we know best. Unfortunately for us...what we know best is FOOD. I agree with what Esther says...if it's too difficult for you to control your emotional eating right now.........try to keep good stuff on hand to snack on--and avoid the bad stuff people are bring you (as much as you can). I am a total emotional eater...a bored eater...a stress eater...and before I know it--I can really get myself into trouble. It's not easy for us to change what we've always known...and during this difficult time---it's going to be 100 times harder for you to control it. Just do the best you can..........that's all anyone can ask of you--and all you should be asking of yourself. Keep your head up. My prayers are with you! Courtney

Tina, I am so sorry to hear about your father. Yes, the stress eating triggers can be so bad. I was three weeks out when my father-in-law died suddenly it was hard....but not as hard as it would be now that I can eat more. Just remember to take time for yourself and STEP AWAY FROM THE FOOD!!! Grab a water and go for a nice walk, remember the good times with your father and think without the food temptations! Hugs to you!!! And no that we are here for you!!!! Donna

Tina, I am so very sorry to hear of your loss. I totally can relate to the stress eating, unfortunately I think that most of us can. I think that you need to just take one day at a time and face each struggle as it comes. Try not to forget about YOU, and how much you have struggled to get where you are now. Your father must have been so proud of you for doing something that would not only better your looks, but your health. He would not want you to have to struggle anymore then you have to. Just try to think of him at peace. A year is a long time to struggle with an illness and you can be proud that he was able to do that. My prayers are with you hun. Stay strong and love yourself, as your Dad would. Hugs Tina

Hi Tina, I am so sorry to hear about your father. There is a trick you need to know about emotional eating. It has to do with the fact that your subconscious mind does not understand negatives. For example, if I said to you "don't think about an apple", there is no way for you to read that without your subconscious mind fetching up an image of an apple and presenting it to you. So when you are trying real hard not to think about food, your subconscious mind fetches up images of exactly what you are trying to avoid and presents them to you. The trick is that, instead of focusing on what *not* to think about, focus on something else altogether. Make a list of things you need to do and concentrate on completing it. Get at least two books and start reading. When you finish the first, put getting another one on your list of things to do while you work on the second. Set a goal for your exercise that will take you to a new personal best and then work hard to achieve it. Contact all the friends you haven't talked to in a while and get caught up. In short, immerse yourself in the constructive or enjoyable things in your life and fully engage in them. Every time you catch yourself thinking inappropriately about food, redirect your energy to something on your list of activities and tasks. It's not much advice, I know. But the notion that trying not to think about something causes your mind to focus on it even more explains a lot about why our obsessions spiral out of control and gives us a tool to break that spiral. Good luck and I hope this helps. -- T.Rob