9 Days to go...still bingeing

So I said to myself last night, "starting tomorrow you will have 10 days of doing the right thing". Everyone has told me even losing 1 lb. helps and to get in the habit of exercising- even if it's just a little. Eating smaller, healthier meals will make it easier for the surgeons to poke around and help the transition into post-op life smoother. Did I do that...no! I slept in until around 11:30 am. had a protein shake. Went back to bed, gabbed on the phone. Had a banana around 2pm.Coffee and a cinammon roll around 6:45 pm. Taco Bell- crunchwrap, taco, double decker taco, and large pepsi around 8:30. I'm starting to really scare myself.

Hi Erika, I read your post and I felt so very sad. I'm sorry you are having this much trouble getting your head around what you are about to undertake. WLS isn't going to be a quick fix. It's a commitment to change your life and habits forever. Have you been to any support meetings? Are there groups around you that can help? Have you considered regular appointments with a counselor? Have you used the assistance of a Nutritionist? I wish you luck and I hope that you can figure out what it is you really want from this procedure. Dieting is hard, no question, but the desire to move into healthy life patterns needs to be strong for your motiviation and strength to do this, and that should get you through. BTE, I am also 9 days to go, May 23. I am not drinking protein shakes but I have been eating 6 times a day, watching all of my sugar intake, drinking plenty of fluids, and trying to cut down my portion sizes. I have lost more than 14 lbs. I haven't gone without, I have just done less, and chioce S/F puddings and the like. Jan K.

You know what Jan, I think I am just playing games with myself. I have been in therapy for over 9 months, and have spent the last 3 discussing this with my therapist. I have been to support groups and had a great deal of pre-op counseling from the hospital regarding the procedure, and the importance of incorporating the good habits BEFORE the surgery. It took me years to come to the decision to have surgery- I went to countless doctors, tried numerous diets, etc. I know WLS is not a quick fix and I am looking forward to having it as a tool to prevent me from bingeing and help me to work on all of my emotional problems that have led to overeating. I am aware that 99% of the "diet" after WLS is the same as conventional wisdom- exercise, lots of water, protein, veggies, fruits and limited carbs. The 1% is a restricted portion size and malabsorption. Anyway, I've become a "last minute" person over the years- thriving on anxiety. I guess my subconscious is playing "good cop/bad cop" and saying "do it do it do it" and see what happens. (re: still overeating, etc.) But my good cop side kind of won out today. I overslept and missed my healthy breakfast, so I stopped at Starbucks and got a small coffee and lowfat apricot muffing. HOWEVER, I did pack my lunch- grilled chicken breast and salad ingredients- 2 c spinach/romaine lettuce mix, 1/8 c dried cranberries, 1/8 c fat free feta cheese, 1/8 c pine nuts, @ 3 Tbsp fat free balsamic vinagrette dressing. And two snacks- and orange and an apple. I now just have to stay motivated and in the reality of my surgery happening in 9 DAYS to walk for 20 minutes when I get home. Even two 10 minute walks!

Well, you are doing the right things! If time is an issue for you, especially at breakfast which it has been for me, I cooked up eggs to hard boil for the week. Every morning I have a hard bold egg and some fruit, fresh if possible and if not I bought the small lunch size packages of fruit in water or natural juice. That's it. I stay satisfied and then have time to plan a nice lunch like you had done. It really is mind over matter, but what does matter is when the matter in your head says go ahead, skip the healthy just this once ~ then it becomes an all the time thing. When you hear that nasty bad cop/voice, try and gain back YOUR control. Why let food control you? Good going today. Today is the only day you need to worry about. Remember that. Today is the only day, stay true today. Jan

Thanks for your support. Especially emphasizing "today". I have a tendency like many to get caught up in tomorrow, the next day and 10 years from now. And/or last night, the day before, last Tuesday etc. Bemoaning the past and trying to control the future, when really all God grants us is the present. So thanks again. I will stay focused on TODAY and how good I will feel when it's over!

HI, I was doing this myself, for a while, but then I got the Weight Loss Surgery Book for Dummies, and it talks about the "Last Supper Syndrome". This is where you eat all of your favorite foods, because you think you'll never be able to eat like this again. This really hit home with me, because at that point, I realized that eating was the focal point in my life. It was my social activity, my way to console myself, I ate when I was celebrating and when I was sad. I think it is important, before surgery to be able to actually practice successfully what your trying to eventually achieve. There is power in being successful BEFORE surgery, because it takes the "doubt" and "fear" out of the equation - you know you can be successful with the additional tool of surgery. I don't mean this to sound like a lecture, as I am writing this to you, I am also telling myself how important it is. Keep in mind, you can eat these foods that you like AFTER surgery...it may be a few months after surgery, but if you choose, you can eat them. Secondly, I read another blog where the person who was going to surgery had too much fat on her liver, and the doctor didn't do the surgery after he got in there....so, you may be sabotaging yourself. I would encourage you to step-up to the plate and take this situation seriously, because you are increasing your risks of being unsuccessful in the future....as well, as compromising your surgery a bit. Personally, I feel like I have to "prove" myself, to myself so that I am certain the success will take place after surgery. Okay, I am done. Know this is written with "caring" in mind. Sincerely, Gesch