Holly, Welcome back! Maybe it's baby steps again. Your surgery was ... hard to find the right words... invasive... okay, a very big surgery. It will probably take your body some time to adjust to everything. How is the physical therapy going?? I can actually tolerate quite a bit of sugar now before I dump. But then sometimes, something that I would not expect results in me sweating and shaking like a leaf. Our bodies are funny little things now. Take it easy! Diane

I have not reached my goal and even though I have lost 100 lbs, I still see fat Holly looking back. I had told someone that I just met that I had lost some weight and they wanted to see a picture, so I brought out my drivers license and I took a look at it and I really have to readjust my mental image because I don't look anything like I did before. The person that I showed it to told me that they didn't believe that it was me. Emotional roller coaster? I used to be so calm and stable all the time, it was what made it easy to do my job. Now it is a struggle. I am hoping as soon as I am able to go walking (two surgeries jan-march) I will be able to mellow out a bit... my poor kids

Yesterday was my first day off in the last two weeks. Things have been really busy at work and it looks like it's going to continue that way for a while longer. I will spend half of the week in Florida (I was there two weeks ago), and this time I am hoping to at least walk along the beach. My hotel is right on the beach and it will be a darn shame if I don't get to feel the sand under my feet. I've been catching up on the posts this morning. For some us, we are struggling with the same things.....scale creep. When I get busy, I eat what I can get my hands on, so I've put on a few (several) pounds the last few weeks. I am hoping before I get on the plane Wednesday morning, I can calm down my inner hunger and stop making such bad food choices. I am going to see if I can get myself on the 5 day pouch test soon!!! I need to up my protein and that's a sure fire way for me to do it. Happy Sunday! Diane

my scale is having a psychopathic episode. it has gone up 4 lbs this week. It thinks that I am 157 instead of 147. I may need a new one. heehee

Hello all... Well as our 2 Year Birthday fast approaches, i have been asked, if i knew then what i know now, would i still have done it?! and i'd have to say yes and no... the health aspect has been wonderful although i'm still dealing with weird menstrual cycles!! but when it comes to my social life,,, i'd have to no.. i wouldn't do it again! I have lost many good friends, well atleast i thought they were friends... my boyfriend became very very insecure which causes some nasty fights! I love that i'm HALF the person i was before!! i love that i can wear jeans every day and be comfortable wearing them! I'm still super self concious about my "rolls" of skin that just wouldn't stretch back.. i still find myself with nasty cravings, mostly for cheese lately though! hahaha i am horrible about taking my vitamins and b12.. and i certainly don't drink as much water as i should.. i went back to the horrible addiction of Mountain Dew and smoking.... my weight has been "Level" for about 4-5 months now.... and i am so very happy with where i'm at physically. i've noticed though that my lows are really low and my highs are very high.. i'm COLD all the time!!! i can never seen to keep warm! my hair never recovered! i used to have LONG THICK hair... i now keep it short, and it's much thinner than it used to be. i started out wearing a size 26 jeans... and i now wear a size 8 size 3xl shirts, and now wearing a Medium, but sometimes still wear a large cuz i like my shirts big anyways disappointing my bra size went from a 44D to a 34C.. but Victoria's Secret has some pretty wonderful and amazing bras!! and i never thought i'd ever wear a padded one, but ahem,, well what can i say... hahahahah I started my jouirney weighing 266lbs I now weigh 130lbs!!!!!!!! i type that and see a WOW... but why is it when i look in the mirror i still see that same insecure fat girl?????? I"m still pretty anal about all the foods i eat, i've been doing good with portion sizes although i don't weigh or measure anything anymore... and i cook as much from scratch as i can, that way i know what's goin into my mouth!!! Is anyone else feeling that emotional rollercoaster? Does anyone else still look in the mirror and see that "fat" person starring back?? CONGRATS to all of us!!! HUGS Ali