Confused please help

Well I spoke with my trainner again today and she refuses to up my training to an hour until i prove I am eating more. What is up with that. She said that my body is in starvation mode and thats why I keep gaining the couple pounds over the weekend when i dont work out.. my body is storing it even though I dont change my eating plans on the weekends. She also said I shouldnt gain weight just from 2 days of not working out each week and that only proves her point. Is this true...She went on to say that right now I am burning my muscle instead of fat and that its not healthy for me. She wouldnt train me today because she said I had done enough and not to do so much on wednesday if I wanted to train. I did a one hour step and one hour pilates and she says I shouldnt do more than an hour to hour and a half at a time. Am I hurting my body. Do I need to weigh more to have more muscle on me. I am in my bmi and body fat range last time I checked and I dont think anything has changed. I have increased my calories and have even made myself sick a few times trying to get more in each day. I dont know what else to do. I wear a 2/3 right now although i refuse to buy new clothes right now.. i am wearing my big 5/4's right now. What do you all think. Even Jo said to me that she is worried I am to skinny and gonna die. I dont see it because i still see the fat person on the outside.. I know I dont have a lot of fat and I can see my ribs, hips and shoulders. What should I do.. up my calories, keep going like i am.. i just dont know.. I am getting in about 1200 a day now.. gee.. being overweight and loosing was much easier than this being there.. maybe.. maybe not thing.. at least when I was trying to loose I knew what to do..

Carla, Carla, Carla! You and I are two peas in a pod! Other than weighing more than you, I'm experiencing the same thing! My Nutritionist is furious with me for working out so much. She even e-mailed me today and asked if I was still going to the gym twice a day. Ooops! Do I need to admit to her that I am??? She told me that if I continue going to the gym twice a day and not increase my calories, she would want to see my behind right back in the doctors office. But that still isn't enough to scare me! I still am bull-headed enough to want to work out more, and not eat a lot. My problem is that I want to eat. I would graze all day long if I could. But I have to mentally keep myself in check to my small mini-meals throughout the day. Anyway, I have the luxury of having a Fitness Coach at the gym who is a Nutrition major. Not a good combination because she is continually on my case. She wouldn't train me with weights any more because she told me she knew I was taking too many classes and that I wasn't eating enough to compensate for what I was burning. Well, I continue to do the weight routines that she had given me in the past. She can't really stop me! Ha, ha! I honestly don't know what to tell you, Carla. I feel your frustrations though! Honestly, I feel like I can't get enough exercise in each day. I'd live at the gym if I didn't have kids to take care of! I completely obsess over every single calorie I eat and I log it into sparkpeople everyday so I know exactly what I'm eating. If I miss a day, I feel completely LOST that I didn't know exactly my caloric intake! I'm frustrated too because I currently weigh between 163 and 165 ... I bounce back and forth and I know it's because I'm not eating enough calories to actually lose any more. Plus, my body fat is low enough that it's making it hard for me to lose more weight, unless I lose the lean muscle. So, it's all very frustrating to me. I'd like to lose another 10 pounds ... I want to lose those pounds sooooo bad! Everyone else says I should stop losing but like you, I still see the former fat person! But, I think that if I weigh 163, that's high enough that I could still stand to lose a few more pounds. I know that muscle takes up less space than fat. But I'm still fixated on the numbers on the scale and I want to weigh less. I'm so glad you understand this! My husband is completely freaked out with me and telling me almost daily that he thinks I'm becoming anorexic. I know that my gym obsession is a bit much ... but it's better than stuffing my face and not exercising like I used to!!! How's that for justification? Hee, hee! Anyway, I'm glad you posted this. If anything else, it's nice to have someone to relate to! Deanna

Can you say transfer addiction, please go get help? You have transferred your addiction to food to an addiction to the gym, any addiction that takes over your life (and going to the gym twice a day is certianly one) warrants looking into. Good luck with that, you'll need to get some help. ANDI

she is right! work out , but be healthy about it... I was loosing muscle mass and had to cut back working out allot , now they say my bones are very very thin and last week I had to have a full body scan because they think I have multiple fractures... so both you and Deanna need to stay healthy.. I would not like to hear anything bad happening to either of you...

oh oh oh do you really want to know what I think? good. because I am gonna tell you anyways. CHILL you need to chill.. instead of working out on cardio and burning, you can work on on weight resistance and build muscle. following each body building session, you need to add one scoop of protein mix (27g min) to 8 - 10 oz of Kefir to rebuild your muscles

I'm in the same boat as Deanna & Carla ! My family is complaining about my eating habits and the bags under my eyes constantly. I know I should eat more ,I just have trouble getting it in. I am trying! Carla has even suggested I eat mor as well and I'm taking it to heart.

Guys.... these people giving you advice are proffesional, they are trained, they know what they are talking about. Do they have anything to gain by telling you this? No - other than your best interests at heart. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE listen to them. You MUST get help with this - I know I am giving straight talking here, but I am VERY concerned about this post. Hear what Jean said - you are damaging your bodies. Thsi si just as bad as being obese. If you can't stop working out so much and obsessing over your calories on your own - get help. You got help with your weight - you took advice from your surgeon and went through the risk of having major surgery to get healthy. Don't go and blow it all now. Remember, this journey is about getting the whole person healthy - body, mind and spirit, not just the external body. You guys have done a fantastic job of the external body. Now take care of the internal body, your mind and your spirit. All the obsessions are NOT healthy. You had surgery to LIVE. Being at the gym as much as you are and watching everything you eat as much as you do is not living. You had surgery to be free of weight issues. Are you free of weight issues yet???? It doesn't sound like it to me. Again, I know I'm going on and on, but please get help Love & hugs to all of you struggling with this

I'll first start off by saying how much I love you...you know when i say that it's going to be a tushy whooping afterwards. I respect what you are doing and I admire you greatly! That being said i think you need to speak with the therapist and nutritionist about what is going on....you are transfer addicted. You have moved it to a healthier addiction but it's no less an addiction. We are all in the same boat you are honey, some of us have found our other addictions and some of us are still searching, without a good therapist something will haunt us once again, it's our personalities and the surgeon can't fix that! Please be careful and get the help you need. I think you like it when people tell you how skinny you are and not to lose more weight, it's getting the attention you didn't have as a child, this is not your fault! ANDI

OMG I feel like I am reading my own writing....I am in the same situation, counting every calorie, fat gram, carb gram and protein gram I eat every day, and every minute of exercise, including calories burned/miles run/heart rate etc. I'm about 5 pounds below what my original goal was, but I can't seem to be satisfied....I just see the fat person, and want to BE IN CONTROL! I keep thinking if I could just get plastic surgery to remove the extra skin, maybe I'd lose another 15 pounds and THEN I'd be satisfied??? No money though :o( don't know how plastics will be possible. Thanks for posting this - at least I know I'm not alone.