Being totally Honest here

Ok guys.. this is tough for me but I wanna talk about my perception of myself. I just posted some pics of myself and I am just so not happy with the way I look. The pants I was in was size 5 so you would think I am skinny, but all I see is a fat girl.. a fat girl with a really sunken face.. I think I look sick. Maybe its the hair loss or my skin hasnt caught up with my face.. I dont know.. but I see all of your pics and you all look so pretty. i dont see that when I look at myself. I know in the past I thought I was not that bad to look at but I just hate looking at pics of me now.. It's crazy when I was over weight I wouldnt take a pic.. now I want to but I feel so ugly in them. What is going on.. is it in my head.. It really makes me miserable to think this way. I cant even believe I had to guts to tell you how this makes me feel... I think I did because I promised pics of the party so I had to post them.

Carla, OKay, I just went to your profile and checked out all of your pics and I can honestly say - you look like a different person. You look healthy. You look wonderful. You look slender. You do not look sick. You face is slim - I know for me too, my body isnt nearly as slender as my face is now. You look very feminine and if you were smiling, Im sure you would look even prettier than you appear in these shots. You, like many of us here, are being WAY to hard on yourself. I dont know what we think is going to happen, but I know I couldnt have been prepared for how I feel about myself now. I remember thinking and saying, "if I could just lose 100 lbs I swear I would be sooo happy".....and like you, I feel less than perfect/and therefore not happy and for myself only, downright inadequate most days. You are beautiful! try saying that to yourself when you get dressed, because it is true! If you say it often enough, maybe you will soon beleive it too! I sure hope so! Hugs, KAthryn

Carla, You are beautiful! Maybe a pic or two you look tired, but who the heck wouldn't be with children. I only have one and he wears me out. I would like to say what you are going through is normal. I'm starting to poke at my body and look for areas that are less than perfect. Go figure.... I never did this when I was 300+, but now.. it's crazy. Remember, too, it hasn't even been a year for us yet. We had major surgery, lost a kazillion pounds, so our bodies still need time to recover. One of the things that I am trying to do is focus on how I feel versus how I look or what the scale says. I try to remind myself I did this for my health and not to have thin thighs. Anyway, chin up.. Diane

Thats hard for me to believe. My partner at work told me about a month ago that i looked sick and my eyes were black. She makes me very self conscience. than my other co-workers have said the same thing. It makes me just wanna hide.

hand up...what makes you think that it's ok to comment on how i look physically, do i comment on how you look? ANDI

HERE HERE!!!! I love it... now if I was just brave enough to say it!! Diane

Hi Diane! It takes anger and courage to call people to task on their bad behavior. When you hold up your hand it's called "reflections in the mirror" it means stop that is naughty but also look at yourself a moment. I wish you enough courage to do that and trust me the nonsense will stop immediately and you'll get an apology. ANDI

(((((((((((((((Carla))))))))))))))))) I've just been looking at your pics and I'm wiping the tears from my eyes. You are such a beautiful family - oh my gosh!! How DARE your co-workers comment on how you look!!! I'm offended for you. You look amazing, I love that shirt you are wearing - it really flatters you and shows off your trim waist. I totally agree with all the other comments already made. You know yourself it's something in your head that needs to re-adjust to your new look. Give yourself time, when you look in the mirror, do not look for all the things you don't like, look at all the bits you do like, and focus on those. Do you think your co-workers have your best interests at heart, or do you think there is a different agenda going on? eg jealousy that you have accomplished so much and achieved so much, taking control of your life? You posted yourself, 'be your own best friend.....' We love ya Carla

Lets see, you work, have how many kids? 5 have a partner, working out, eating right, planned a hudge party... need I go on...LOL you might be tired ..... you look great to me! people feal the right to be mean... I wonder what makes them think they have that right... It makes me soooooooooooooooooooo mad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! size 5 (I wish I was a size 5)

One question??? Have you taken a physical photo of yourself pre-op and compared it to a photo of yourself postop??? You are definately not a "fat girl". I remember reading about people who had WLS having others who knew them preop have a hard time dealing with the way they looked post op. Its not that you look bad you just look sooooo different from they are used to. To them maybe you do look sick b/c they were used to seeing you with so much more "meat on your bones". So take what they say as what it is....senseless rambling!!! You look great! mandy