What should I do

Guys.. I am so distraught right now.. i need someone to talk to... My best friend who lives in las vegas is in the hospital.. I have known chrissy for 20 years.. I guess yesterday morning she had an anurism (?) and than a major stroke.. she is only 43 years old. The bleed in her brain is pretty bad.. it is inside instead of on the outside so they cant do anything to relieve the pressure.. the doc says she is probably not gonna make it. The blood is so bad it is covering over half of her brain on the cat scan. She has really high blood pressure and is over weight and we have talked about her taking better care of herself.. omg.. i dont know what to do. I just found out she has a 108 temp and is packed in ice.. that means she cant regulate her temp.. she is on life support. the doc says even if she recovers she will be a vegetable the rest of her life although he again says he doesnt feel she is gonna make it. I was gonna fly out tommorrow to see her but than a few ppl said I shouldn't because she is gone.. I dont know what to do.. I dont really get along with her other half and would have to be around them. I know I am being foolish but I would not be going there for them but to see my friend one last time. She may not even make it til i get there.. I am just sitting here like a fool crying my eyes out.. i just dont know what to do... I would have to go alone.. leave my kids, my family and I dont even know if i would make it in time or if going would even help. I am just being torn apart inside..

(((((((((((((((Carla)))))))))))))))))) you have to do what you need to do. Dont' let anyone else tell you what you should do. If you need to see your friend one last time, then go. You will never have this chance again. If you think your friend would like you there, whether she is aware of it at the time or not, then go. This is such a difficult thing for you right now. Do not do what is expected of you, do what is best for you and your friend. I wish I could be there for you to give you a great big hug. Sadly, life is not easy, I wish I could make it so for you and your friend. Know that you are in my prayers for God's will and comfort to be wrapped around you, surrounding you and your friend with his love and guidance. This is my opinion, at the end of the day, you are the one who has to live with your decision. It is easy for others to give advice and tell you what to do, but we are not you, we cannot make the same choices as you can. Trust your heart and follow the wisdom inside you. Sorry I can't be of more help....

Oh Carla, I'm sooooo sorry... Ruth is so amazing with words and really said it all, but I just wanted to let you know I'm thinking about you and praying for you... Hugs, Bobbie

Oh my gosh, Carla, that is soooo sad! I think Ruth said it very well. Do what YOU want, not what others expect or want from you. This is the last time you will see her. If you want to see her in this state, then you should go. If you want to remember your last time with her the way it was the last time, without her on life support, then don't go. I wouldn't worry about her family, just do what is best for you. Good luck Carla. Let us know what you do! Deanna

Sorry Carla; ((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))) Do what is in your heart to do . also understand that if you don't get a chance to say goodbye your friend will still know how much you cared for her. Death is always harder on those left behind, those that pass go to a much better place.

((((((((((((Carla))))))))))))))))))))))) let me be your voice of reason. I was the donor liason for donor harvesting (now there's a job i'll tell you about some day!) Honey her brain is what controls the woman you knew, once she bled through you know you lost her, the woman you knew and loved. Ask G*D what you should do, he'll tell you what your next course of action should be and he'll guide your hand. Did she have a cause that she believed in that you could donate time and/or money to? Does she have children, you could write a letter to them telling them about their mom and what she meant to you and how special she was. I did that with my friend Howard, his daughter was only 4 and his son was in utero, if i didnt' write them letters they'd never know what an awesome man Howard was. I don't think you are being fooli****hink you are being a wonderful friend Carla and I'd be honored to call you my friend. I want you to take a deep breathe and let it out very slowly, in your mind you need to ask G*d to guide you with what to do and look for the signs, it'll work you've got to believe. Hugs, ANDI