Tomorrow's Quiet Day

Each semester the seminary has a quiet day where we take the day off from classes and go to a retreat center and spend the day in silence. We can read, sit in the sun, sleep, write, meditate, listen to music...whatever, but we can't talk to one another. We begin with morning prayer, and have lunch of soup and bread...all in silence. What I have been thinking about is that silence is always a problem for me. I realize that I pushed my feelings down with food so they wouldn't come out. And now that there isn't food, I try to stay busy with the everyday life things....staying busy also drowns out feelings. But, quiet day is the day where I am not busy as a bee, where I am not eating and I can't talk to anyone about useless things. Sigh......It's like a time bomb of waiting for my feelings to come up in the midst of the silence. Does anyone ever feel this? I guess at seminary we talk a lot about being silent and waiting and listening for God. So I come up against this silence thing a lot. I guess the silent times are when I get feelings of inadequacy. I don't look right....I am not losing fast enough....I don't do what I should in school...I am not cut out to be a priest...etc. Rachael

do you journal at all? I'm a big journaler and that's where i put all my negativity if i need to so it doesn't form a venum in my body and poison me. Perhaps it's time to talk to the inner Rachael and tell her how much you love her and how bright you think she is......make it a time of reflection on all the good things you've done or will do by the time this year ends. Be Well, ANDI

I journal too - I find it's a good way to see things in my life, or about me objectively. I think most people if they are honest in todays society find silence threatening/difficult for the same reasons. We often use busy-ness to hide in. I now love quiet days where I together with God can reflect on all that's happening in my life. Give God the opportunity to speak and minister to you about how you feel. It may be a difficult time, but it will be a healing and cleansing time for you. I think this is perfect timing for you. God has removed the support of food so you can turn to Him to be your support. Remember, in our weakness we find strength in God. I feel that He is going to use you in a very powerful way in the coming time, using all your experiences through this journey. Lean on Him and don't trust in your own understanding but His. Praying for you Ruth

It was an interesting quiet day. Very rainy and foggy so not appropriate for hiking through the woods. The proctor was a new professor from capetown, south africa. He spoke about Ignatius of Loyola and his methods of spirituality. He led two meditations and then we were free. One of the exercise was interesting and helped me journal a bit. The time usually drags for me each semester at these things, but this time it went pretty quickly. Rachael