sex anyone? (blushing)

There was a recent post about how to replace the food addiction after surgery and I as I was reading sex was mentioned a couple of times and this got me thinking. I have not enjoyed sex for many years and I always blamed it on being overweight, birth control pills, low self-esteem, etc. The only time I remotely enjoyed it was when I was pregnant. I have the most wonderful husband in the world and he absolutely loves it but doesnt ever initiate it because he knows about my issues concerning it. I thought after losing 48 pounds Id see some improvement but none yet. Ive considered going to the doctor but thats so embarrassing, "uh yeh doc, I need something to get me off"! Im only 25! This is embarrassing now, but I figured this would be a good place to start with. And yes weve tried all the tricks in the book, the foreplay, the romanticisism,etc. Im just broke. I sincerely want to satisfy and be satisfied. Anyone else having these problems? I just want to be one of those people that looks forward to it and enjoys it to the fullest, not someone that says oh no not again! thanks, candy

If it truly is because of your weight, there are a few things you can try to become more comfortable with your body when it comes to sex. For instance, when I had a relationship recently, I was very embarrassed about being undressed in front of my man. I had to "ease" my way into it. I talked to him about my concerns. That was a big step for me. He was very encouraging and understanding, and I explained that I needed to hear often that he finds me attractive. This was no problem. Then, I would use times away from the bedroom to get more intimate. While we were watching tv, I would bring his hand over to my lower stomach (the body part I'm most self-conscious about) and rest it there. I would let him caress me and force myself to relax and enjoy the touches. I gradually let him touch my other "embarrassing" areas. I did this often until I knew he was familiar with my body. I would purposely leave the light on (albeit dimly at first) while we would kiss and caress. Eventually, I became more comfortable with intimacy. However, if there's more to this than your body image, such as a history of trauma, you may want to make an appointment with a therapist to talk through some of these issues. In my opinion, life is just too short to not enjoy sex! Good luck! Julie

Hello- I was one of the ones that posted to that food addiction ? and answered sex. I'm 21 noticed you said you were 25. Also read your profile where it said you married your high school sweetheart! I did too!!! I also didn't enjoy sex for a while before the surgery. It was when I was 231 lbs tho. When I got under 200 I kinda did. Now oh lord help my hubby! LOL! Haven't been pregnant but I hear its the best bc of the hormones and all. Wouldn't know tho! What exactly are your issues concerning it? I wouldn't ever go to a doc and ask that. Your not broke, you just haven't tried the things that are right for you. Its a good start that you want to satisfy and be satisfied. I'm not having problems, unless you count not getting it enough! LOL! But my hubby says he only wants it no more than 2 times a day! DANG HIM! LOL! I could do it all day and all night! I use to say oh no not again, but not anymore. LOL! I think he might say it! LOL! I wanna help you, I really do but I needa know your issues concerning, you can email me if you wanna. ~April~ Lap RNY May 13, 2005 21 yrs old, 5'1 231 / 184.5 / 120

Candy, I recently saw a segment on one of the shows like "60 Minutes" or "20/20" where they are doing testosterone shots on women to increase their sex drive. Woohoo! Lori 384/322/170