Hello fellow Maysters.... :)

Hello, I used to post under here under a diff name.... (with a yellow rose as my avatar!!) but finally have changed/updated my profile... I had my surgery 3 years ago today. It has been a wild ride ever since. I feel pretty good, but still somewhat lost. Pre-surgery I was on a lot of medications, now I take a lot of supplements and vits.... but my cholest and acid reflux is gone.... the high BP is pretty much gone, but sometimes it goes way up. Last Fall I left my job of 18 plus years to search out a different life.... I have been doing temp work (when I can get it) and have not been able to find full time work. So that is hard. I had a tough break up in Jan of 07 and I am now 'dating as a thin person' for the first time in ages... well, let me tell you... in my 40s, its not that simple.. (but not sure it was simple in my 20s either... lol) Sometimes I think I was much happier as a heavy person. I had my fat to hide behind, and today I dont have as much guts as I used to have. Or maybe that is just my age! eek. I dont always post here, but I lurk. I find you all to be such a great support and inspiring. I have gotten as low as 20.1 BMI and now I am at 22.3 Ithink? It says I am 'normal' lol... me? normal!!? Anyway.... I still USE food for the wrong reasons, and I still dont like my body at the lowest weight... lol. i have had so many wonderful days though... So all we we can do is keep moving on. For the next year of 'recovery' I hope to find love in my heart and a job... I am involved with someone but I want it to be FULL TIME!! and a FULL TIME job too... and I would looooove a baby, but that might really be pushing it... lol hugs, J.

Hi Jill, I agree life was simpler when I was heavy..not always worrying about food and exercise but I do feel better and am definitely healthier. My family and even neighbors are proud of my dedication so I guess it al works out. So you are the Yellow rose of Texas from before? Jane

Hello Jane, yes, that was me.... lol, nice to be remembered.... i know, it seems that sometimes it was easier to be 'heavy' but i guess not really.... hahaha... hiding behind the fat, hiding behind the jokes... hiding hiding hiding.. oh lordy!!! Now, if only I could just HIDE!! HOPE YOU HAD A HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!!! hugs, Jill

Hey Jill! I like..."this next year of recovery"...its never ending right?

Hi Aliya, Yes....!! It IS NEVER ending.... and it is also a gift each day too. Some days it may not feel like a gift. I am still searching for so many answers too. Your story reminds me of mine in a lot of ways too. I have been relocating like crazy... lol. I even lived in NJ for a few months. I liked it but I too want to live near the south. Right now I am in MA, and I am trying to get to GA. Savannah or Charleston would be wonderful.... I am heading to VA bch next..... hugs. Jill

I am migrating this yr! I claim it North Carolina is it for me, (went to school there). Where were you in Jersey?

Hi, one of my best friends lives in Old Bridge and I stayed at her house and then we would stay in Manhattan some nights too... at her boyfriend's. i was doing catering work for a while. good money, but tough on my tootsies.. and the hours , eeek. i am a morning person. So, I am heading to VA and am applying for jobs in VA Bch, Savannah and Charleston still... although, i dont see that happening. My only experinces in NC have been in Kitty hawk and okrakoke.... love that area!! love the south. the north east is way tooooooo collllllld...... burrrrrr!! xo