My year long journey
What a time to reflect on the 12 months that have passed. My journey actually started 2 years before my surgery date. That's when I began to think about WLS as an option. I attended my surgeon's seminar, which was very informative about the good and the bad. At that time, I just couldn't make the decision to go forward because I was so afraid of letting myself down long term. I just couldn't bear the thought of failing 2 years out of surgery or beyond. I mean, what would that say about me if I couldn't even make the surgery work? So, I decided I would try and diet and lose weight -- which of course, never happened. And I truly believe that I would be at my heaviest weight or more today, if I had not done the surgery. My health would definitely be worse off.
So what was the turning point? I was in my PCP's office in January 2005 (see my answers below -- my PCP is incredible!). She was looking over my maintenance of Hypertension and Diabetes, both handled with medication. All she stated was that I was controlling them alright today, but what really concerned her was that I was so young and I had so many years ahead of me to develop all of the complications that go hand in hand with the diseases. I'd never really thought about that before. I simply did not think that I could handle other problems down the road. I controlled my diseases decently with medication, but I did nothing to make them better. I didn't care about my diet or workouts. What would happen to me with added complications?
So, that got the wheels in motion, and it has been an incredible experience ever since. I have learned so much about myself over these last 12 months. I never considered myself an emotional eater. But it became so apparent when I tried to control it. I couldn't believe the addiction I had to making myself feel better or reward myself with food. I still have to work on this every day, but it's a good fight. I've always been an "all or nothing" thinker, and this surgery has taught me that there is middle ground. If I struggle one day, it doesn't mean that I've failed. I can keep going the next day.
I am so thankful to all of the people that have supported me. My husband, my parents, my sister, and my in-laws have been my pillars of encouragement, and I am beginning to see what others have always seen in me. That is an incredible feeling! And, I have a special thank you to the Maysters support group and my surgeon's support group. For once, I have not wanted to do this all on my own, and I welcome sharing this with others that are in the same position. It's a source of support that I never knew I would embrace.
1. Surgery date/type of surgery: May 11, 2005/ Lap RNY
2. Highest weight/date: 235/2004 I'm 5'1" tall
3. Starting weight/BMI: 227/42.8 - Extremely Obese
4. Starting clothing size/shoe size: 20/8 wide
5. Current weight/BMI: 158/29.8 - Moderately Overweight
6. Current clothing size/shoe size: 10/7.5 sometimes wide
7. Pounds/inches lost: 69/don't know
8. Goal weight/BMI: 127/23.9 - Normal Weight
9. Pounds to goal weight: 31
10. Medical issues that have resolved because of the surgery: Hypertension, Diabetes
11. First wow moment after surgery: Eating such a small amount and being totally satisfied.
12. Best overall wow moment after surgery: When my PCP told me my a1c level was normal and she wrote Diabetes Gone on my chart! I cried my eyes out. I had no idea that it would mean so much to me, after years of ignoring my disease.
13. Most recent wow moment after surgery: Visiting England and not having tired feet -- AT ALL. Also climbing all 580 stairs to the very top of St. Paul's Cathedral. I would have never been able to do it when we visited 2 years ago.
14. Things that you can do now that you couldn't a year ago: So many! Stand up without leaning on something for support. Not feel like I was the fat chick that no one wanted to sit next to on the airplane. Sit my purse AND a water bottle on my lap with room left over!
15. Things that you never thought you'd be doing that you are doing now: Working out several days a week. Wanting to become more involved in community events. Shopping in the regular clothing section.
16. Things that you want to do in the future now that you are able: Start a family.
17. What did you wish that you knew before surgery that you know now? That I would embrace support groups and want to be involved.
18. What has surprised you the most since your surgery? That I care about the calorie and fat content of what I put into my mouth (at least on most days).
19. Do you have any regrets since your surgery? Only that I did not have surgery 3 years ago when I first started thinking about it.
20. Any things that you wish you would have done differently during your post-op journey? Not allow sugar in during the holidays.
21. Besides the change in size, what other changes have you seen in yourself? Are the changes for the good or bad? I am more assertive at work, which can be good and bad. My emotions are even more at the surface now that I am not medicating them with food. Hair loss! Hoping it will all grow back.
22. What has been the easiest thing since surgery? Cutting out soda. I had no idea that I would not miss it. I have not had any carbonation since surgery!
23. What has been the hardest thing since surgery? To keep emotional eating at bay -- eating when I'm upset, to celebrate, and every emotion in between.
24. What remains a struggle for you? Feeling like people are judging me as a failure now that the weight loss has slowed way down. I don't want people to think that I've let the surgery stop working for me.
25. Do you drink with meals? No. Unless it's spicy tuna sushi.
26. Do you drink carbonated beverages? No
27. Do you drink alcohol? I had a taste on our cruise, but I really don't miss it.
28. Do you intake protein supplements? If so, how much per day. No.
29. How has the surgery effected your relationship with spouse or significant other? Made it stronger. I always knew my husband was supportive, but it's so nice to see it in action!
30. How has the surgery effected your relationship with your family? It's even better. I think I have inspired family members in their goals. My parents are throwing me a 35th birthday party/surgiversary party next week. It will be great!
31. How has the surgery effected your relationship with your friends? Stayed the same. I don't have many close friends, but I am now looking to find more!
32. How has the surgery effected your relationship with your coworkers? I've become more assertive, which some perceive as "*****", but overall, I think I've gained more respect.
33. If you could pass along advice "been there, done that" to pre-ops, what advice would it be? To never become complacent during the honeymoon period when the weight melts off. It's over all too soon.
34. What is your favorite forum on OH? (Hint, hint) The Maysters!
35. Who has inspired you in your journey the most? Is it someone who know who has had the surgery? Is it someone's profile that you track? Is it someone from your local support group? One person that has inspired me greatly is my PCP, Tracy Schifini. She is incredible. All of her staff is so proud of me, and they are all excited to see me each visit. When my a1c level was normal, Dr. Schifini was practically jumping up and down and screaming at me. She announced it to all of her staff. It's a rarity to have a doctor to encourages and congratulates you instead of lecturing you on the same old stuff (I know we've all been there!).
Angie
Kathy 
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