What do You See in the Mirror?

Finally this past month when I look in the mirror I can actually see a thin person looking back at me some of the time! It is amazing the tricks that our mind can play on us. I use to sit at the mall or work or wherever and wonder "am I as fat as them?" I know it is terrible but I am sure we have all been there. Now I sit and wonder "am I as skinny as them?" A good friend at work asked me what I weigh the other day and come to find out I weigh only about 10 lbs more than her. We are about the same height and I have always considered her thin. It is nice to finally begin to see myself as I really look. So many times I still think I am obese. I guess I will just keep on working on my mental part! How about you? Do you see the real you?

More like "WHO" is that in the mirror? I'm like you, I just don't see myself as thin as everyone else sees me. I still see myself as big. It's worse when I'm out buying clothes. I'll look at a cute outfit and I'll put it back on the rack because I think I can't wear it. If I would try it on, I would find out that I CAN wear it with no problem. Even when I'm folding laundry, I'll hold up a pair of my jeans and just look at them. They look so small to me and I wonder how I can fit in them. Weird how our minds play tricks on us.

I don't see myself as a thin person, because I am not thin, yet. I have way, way too much hanging skin on my arms, thighs, and a big panni. Maybe after reconstructive surgery, I might look thin to me. But, I think I have always had a strange body image in that I didn't think I was as fat as I was. I have been obese since I was a small child, and at some point my brain didn't see me as huge as I got. It would only be when I saw a photo of myself that I couldn't believe how big I was (351). I think my mind stopped seeing me at about 220, where I was in my early 20's. I hit the high 200's at about 30, and got to 350 by 35. I stayed there until I had my surgery at 49. So when I look in a mirror, I see myself as I have always seen myself, which I think is a bit weird. We are able to fool our eyes when we are thinner AND when we are fatter. Debra M.

Good topic Jen, I still have "fat girl syndrome".... I go to the Women's clothing section first... hit myself on the forehead (literally) and then go to the "normal" weight clothes. I wear shirts outside my pants, even though I now have a waste. I pull the airline seatbelt out to the maximum length before connecting it... it's still a pleasant surprise when I have to grab the end and synch it tight. Having just come back from Vacation (where the compliments flowed like chocolate), I took a good look at myself in the mirror. First, to admire my beautiful tan and second, to take inventory of all the trouble spots that need work. (Exercise and eventually plastics). Damn... I look pretty good!! Not a day goes by without my DH complimenting me either verbally or physically about some part of my body. I think I used to be embarrassed before because he'd always get a handful of blubber.... Now... what the hell.. . grab away... Panni and bat wings aside... I can truthfully (with some conceit) say that I've got it all over most of my friends and co-workers of the same age.... (That sounded worse that I thought). To stop the rambling and get back to the subject... The "fat girl is still in the Mirror"... but she's looking better and better every day.... Thanks Jen... Kate Z

Jen, I fluctuate back and forth between being totally amazed at how good I'm starting to look, but, also still feeling like the big fat girl. I exercise to the max, so plastic surgery will probably be in my cards eventually. They say that really helps patients with their self image. I think that even more than how I look, I take so much joy in what I'm able to do physically...wow, I'm amazed every day. My weight had really restricted my life! Lori

I have my moments where I think, "Wow, I look really good! I am skinny!" But these moments aren't too often. I used to always see the size 20 me and that faded. I'm a 4/6 now but I don't see myself there...it's more like a 12. I always pick up the 6's and say this is waaaaaaaay too small. I still try on Large shirts because I think the medium will be too tight. It's weird but I think one day I'll see the new, real me. I'm always telling my husband to "find someone my size and point her out." But when he says, "oh, she's about your size" I'm in disbelief because that girl is thin! He gives me a crazy look and tries to convince me that's my size. Again, I have moments here and there but it's still hard sometimes.

Thanks for all your responses!! It is so amazing to me how we all think alike!

Boy did you hit home in this post. I get compliments everyday and I still just can't see it and people look at me like I am crazy! They don't believe that I can't see my own weight lost. Today, I sit here in a regular size 16 jeans and I can barely believe it. When I ordered them and pulled them out of the back, I said no way will I be able to fit into those and low and behold, they are even lose today. I am actually frighten to get a size 14 in jeans. I have gone from a 22W to a regular size 16 jeans and a regular 14 in everything else and it's still hard for me to see that in the mirror. My DH is loving it and doesn't understand why I don't see it but he says that's OK, I'll see it for you for now. Hopefully, as time goes on, I will be able to go into a regular size store and purchase items, but right now I haven't been able to do it. I still go to the plus size stores and then leave with nothing. I have only been able to order things from catelogs. When do we get it!! NB S283/C208/G185-190lbs