Anyone else have a hard time with....

Compliments?? I am struggling big time! I used to hear the old standard that everyone says to plus sized gals * You have such as pretty face * I wish I had a dollar for every time I heard that one.. I wouldn't have to work! Now I'm getting genuine complements and I can't help but think that people feel like they have to say something nice to me. I'm the smallest I've been in years... but I know I'm still big. I'm hovering at the 200 lb mark so I've got a bit to go. I was talking to a woman who I had never met before a few days ago. She overheard me talking to someone else and joined in the conversation. After finding out that I've had surgery she said "I just can't imagine you ever being fat because you look like someone who was always thin." Then after I told her how much I used to weigh and how much I weigh now... she said that she would never have imagined that I ever weighed that much and I def don't look like the size I wear." I wasn't sure how to take this... I'm used to people looking at me like *she should not be wearing that* or I once heard this one *why do fat people even attempt to be trendy... it's just sad and pathetic to see them being so clueless as to what they look like* I overheard a very loud conversation taking place next to me once when I was wearing what I thought was a very cute outfit... Later one of them asked me where I got my shoes because she liked them. It is so hard to go from years and years of back handed compliments and out and out derogatory comments to someone actually thinking I look nice. I just got used to the pointing, whispering, and giggling... My fiance always told me it was in my head... but I saw it happen. Now I don't get that anymore... even though sometimes the old demon creeps back in my head and tells me that I still look like I'm 280. My fiance tells me that I have phantom fat syndrome. I still think I'm fat even though I'm not that big anymore. I guess it's just going to take time to get over it.

I am actually getting tired of people I work with calling my skinny. First of all I am not skinny weighing in at 232. I am smaller than my previous self of 307 which is a great accomplishment and I am half way to goal. I look at my new clothes and I think that will never fit me now because it looks too narrow and then I put it on and it is a little baggy. I guess I think of myself as the old me still. I guess we can get over it together!.......... Christine 307/232/150

I must be suffering from the same syndrome .. I spend a lot of time still looking in the mirror and really trying to see ME.... I know I have lost the weight .. and I feel better.. but sometimes I still wonder if the world sees me as OBESE . My family tells me I do not need to loose anymore and that I look great . But I feel like when I am down to 150 I will be at goal . I am wearing trendier clothes now ... and I feel pretty confident that I look good . I just take the compliments .. Take em ..... there good for you . Nat

I just had this same conversation with a lady that I have known for several years and we hadn't seen each other for quite some time until right after I had my surgery in May and she had hers in November. It is very hard to stop putting yourself down because like you have said you have heard it for so long. We have been disappointed so many times on so many levels. I am focusing on being my OWN bestfriend and making myself happy and being the best mother I can be. I feel like I am a better mother and feel much better about myself. I too am getting tired of co-workers saying "Hey skinny" It was sweet at first but getting old fast. I was 330 before surgery and have reached 255. Some days I probably feel I look better than I really do! LOL But I know I have a long ways to go. My goal is 145. My husband is not supportive at all never says you are looking good. Just "how much have you lost?" in a tone that gripes my butt. So if you have supportive family and friends cherish them and be good to yourself you deserve it! "Be your own bestfriend" Donna

Cassie, I used to love a compliment because it was a rare occassion that I ever got one. Now, I am getting those compliments and I am beginning to hate them. Everyone I see always starts out saying OH MY GOD you look so good. I don't know how to handle this new compliment thingy. I don't want to be rude, but I am so tried of saying Thank You. I guess it could be worse with me as not to have someone notice what I have accomplised thus far. So for now I am still smiling. Suzi Jones

It is weird and difficult to handle at times. I'm very tired of being called "skinny". Esp since I see that I have at least 70 more pounds to lose! It's nice that people want to be supportive though. But, I do feel odd sometimes. I'm still just trying to remember to say "thank you" before I escape! LOL

Everyone keeps telling me that If I lose another lb I will blow away! I don't see it and sometimes it makes me feel as if they are picking on me. I also suffer from the phantom fat syndrom and I have people that tell me I look Phat (good) but my head hears fat. I have never really gotten compliments so I do not know how to take them.