Mama said there'd be days like this

By the time my brother told anyone that this was going on, the plan to send nephew to AK was already in the works. My mother, whom my brother finally told, was LIVID. She lives nearby and would happily have taken my nephew in for an indefinite period of time. My idiot brother, who looks like MR Clean (big, bald, strong) stayed in an abusive relationship with a woman before current wife for 3 years. She regularly beat him up and he just stayed and put up with it, despite family sending money to help him move out, etc. I have no earthly idea what goes through his head. I have a hard time believing we are related. How many calories do you think I'd burn if I went and beat some sense into him? (jk...I don't think even THAT would work). Frankly I have some suspicions that the story he told mom (which is what I've outlined here) is full of holes and might be a total fabrication. Maybe that's just denial speaking; I hate to think of my dear nephew going through that AGAIN. Thanks for your concern-I wish I was not so far from them (they're in AZ and I'm in MN) or I might be able to do SOMETHING. Hugs, Susan

O sweet Susan ... now that you have written it down ... WRITE IT OFF ... Yeaa .. I could sit here and tell ya tommorow is another day .. which is true .. but you came here ,.. know what happend .. and by Gosh you know how to get over it ... You are doing so great ... and it happens .. to all of us at one time or another .. We had our stomachs redone .. not our brains .. Hang in there hunny bunny .. it will be ok .. But just promise me if you do not do anything else .. you will not drink with your meals .. this is one of my absolute --- no no's . It does more than stretch your pouch it allows you to eat more .. YOU ARE DOING GREAT .. ((((((((((( SUSAN ))))))))) See yass , Nat

Susan - Yep you will have days like this - well not exactly like this but you know what I mean. First, you don't have any control over your brother or his actions. God knows it would be a great thing if we all did. As far as the calories go - look you had a tad over 400 cals that you were supposed to have. You need to take it 3500 extra over what you burn off to gain a pound. Cut yourself some slack my dear. You had a totally **** day - but you got through it and even found time to hit the gym to boot. Give yourself a break and move on a little wiser. I am sorry to hear about your nephew. I have a a simular situation with my brother - except he is the one that is abusive. I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to knock some sense into him but that won't work. *I actually tried it once* I sounds like your brother is repeating a pattern with his choice of women. The pattern of repeating is very common as is his reluctance to tell anyone about it. The solution he picked is certainly not the one you would have chosen and hopefully he will be able to remedy the situation. If possible get "Mr Clean" into some type of therapy - even better if the sister-in-law can get some first. Take care!

John- Thanks for your calm words of wisdom. I've been working to get my bro into therapy for years now. He's stubbornly into self-destruction. Thanks again- Susan

Susan, I am so sorry to hear that this is happening so here is a ((((HUG))) You know this to shall pass and when your nephew grows into the strong young man he is meant to be he will remember you in good light. Plz don't beat yourself up ok cuz we have all did it but your just far more brave than most of us by posting it. So bask in the fact that you have helped many of us know we are not alone on this one okay. Others do it but we pull thru together. Plus I don't want to bring up my cheesecake from the cheese cake factory. Just forget I said anything (((HUG))) Blessings NAT

Natalie- Thanks for reminding me that my nephew is a strong person and he will grow up with God's help just like he's supposed to. Now about that cheesecake... *drooling* Nope, better not-I'll have nightmares about it. Hugs, Susan

Susan, You have been such a wonderful inspiration to me and to so many others on this message board!! YOU are an incredible person with such a good heart... and you can't beat yourself up over your off day!! We ALL have them... (we just don't always admit it)... and even today, I've found that I'm overly emotional and I'm finding myself SO Hungry... I ate like 8 crackers and a protein bar this morning (and it's only noon) and that is more than I usually eat all day!! For the first time since surgery I am finding myself really hungry today!! I'm feeling really emotional, and it feels like every song on the radio is being played to play with my emotions today... and I'm not going through anything like you are going through with your nephew (who will be in my prayers)... anyway, my point is... that we are all human... and we all slip once in a while... the wonderful thing is that tomorrow is always a new day and yesterday is gone and can never be had again... so let it all go... and start anew!! Don't worry about it... let it go. In fact, Let Go & Let God. And of course, my favorite saying... "Worrying does not empty tomorrow of it's troubles, it empties today of it's strength." So, don't worry about what you did yesterday, cuz tomorrow is just a little while away and it's going to be all new... a new chance for making new choices... (that dont' include things we shouldn't eat) and your hubby is right... even with all you ate, it's still WAY less than it would have been pre surgery... So, in a way I guess you could consider yourself lucky that you got to eat all that stuff...cuz I can't get in near that amount... My doctor says that my pouch is the size of my thumb and to always use my thumb as a guide when I'm looking at portion size (and he's right, cuz any more than that, I'm puking like a wild person!!) Anyway Girlfriend... the whole point of this run on sentance is this... YOU are a wonderful person... YOU had a slip up with food but TOMORROW is a new day and you will start over and you will remember that it's probably not the last time that you will slip up, but it's OK... you are doing great on your exercise... anyone who can do an hour on that eliptical machine (which I have lovingly named Satans Machine) is a STAR in my book!!! So, chin up girl!! YOU ARE A STAR!! You look marvelous and you are doing just awesome!!!! Keep up the good work... keep the faith and BELIEVE IN YOU!!! Hugs, Always, Loree

Loree- Thank you so much sweetie! I love your favorite saying; I wrote it down! Now, when are you going to get a new picture *stern look*?? If you don't get one sent in soon, I'm gonna come make you do Satan's Machine with me . Hugs, Susan

Susan, I will pray that things go better for you and your family--is there any way there could be a court-appointed guardian ad lietum (spelling) appointed for the nephew?? That way he would have a 'voice' in his situation--no matter. I had a similar day with food recently--its a tough situation. Hang in there..I just finally went to bed and to sleep and said, "Tommorrow is another day"!! And wow, isn't Mama always right?? Hugs Debbie R.