Just checking in

A-Team, I want to tell all of you that I have read many of your posts and have stayed here in the background a lot but that you are all doing AWESOME!!!!! We should all be SO proud of ourselves! I have had my fair share of complications but want to say that I WOULD DO IT AGAIN IN A HEARTBEAT!!! I finally reached my doctors goal and yet do not see my weight as being healthy yet. I have decided to go further and reach for my goal of 115. I seem to have stalled for the last month or so but hope to be back as a big loser soon. I began my journey at 250 wearing a size 26/28 and now sit at 145 wearing a size 6/8. Through this journey I have done many things that made me think I had lost my mind. Like cutting my waist length hair to my jaw, have learned to throw up without a sound, actually allowed people to see all my excess skin, and talked very openly about losing my boobs, butt, and my body as well as all tone that was ever in my skin, and not felt embarrassed. I guess what I want to know from all of you is ARE YOU REALLY THE SAME PESON YOU WERE????? I know that I am not.... Thanks for listening and for being so supportive thru this adventure. Katherine

Katherine-- that is wonderful news. Wow a size 6/8. I want to be about a size 8. My goal is 130. I am about 167 but it is kind of up and down right now. My starting weight was 217. You are probably thinking ~ what? I am barely 5 ' 0" so that is my biggest challenge. My height makes my weight loss not as noticable. I have lost 45 -50 lbs. My surgery date was April 07. I had the lapband. I am the same person. I am just happier and more confident. I think alot of people allow cir****tances to change them sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse. I think you are just living freely and I think that is great. Not crazy. You are now confident enough to do things for no other reason other that just because you want to. That is freedom. That is a wonderful thing. So, don't let anyone tell you any different. You have done so good and you need to celebrate. Let us know how it goes. I can't wait until our surgery anniversary date. I think we are all healthier not just physically but emotionally. Stay in touch.

You're doing so good Katherine! I think its awesome that you're able to share with others your experience. I think im the exact opposite and im not sure why? I mean, i love when people compliment me but i get so embarrassed at the same time! So to answer your question.....I do think im the same person as i was before. Im insecure and I struggle to accept a compliment. I guess when i look in the mirror i see the same person still. Im not sure why but i know others have experienced this too. I dont feel like i look any different than i did before, and i certainly dont feel any different as far as confidence goes. (although i do feel healthier!) Ive gone from a size 18/20-214lbs to a size 6/8-137lbs ....so obviously im healthier and must look different to others......but to myself i see the same fat and flab. Im still always wondering how i can improve how i look. I see a small wrinkle and i think "botox!" i see flab and i want to cut it all off, i see thick coarse hair and i want to shave my head. I actually GAINED weight to qualify for gastric bypass. Talk about desperate! Weird and quite pathetic actually when i think about it....but I think there are underlying reasons behind my thinking process and im trying to work on that through therapy. (my father was always very critical of how i looked and i had to be "perfect" ALWAYS......also, i recently found out my husband had been having a long term affair with my best friend....did wonders for my self esteem) Anyway, im going to work on myself and hopefully one day ill like who i see when i look in the mirror When colleagues and friends ask me how ive lost the weight, i do share with them...but it does make me uncomfortable. Im anxious for the day people dont notice. Silly probably. Anyway, im proud of you! I wish you continued success during this journey

Wow Katherine, you are doing so great! I never mastered the silent barfing technique. My last episode was about a month ago after Chinese food, and I had to throw up out of the car window (I was a passenger) as we passed by a sidewalk cafe full of people. It was wretched. The one day I didn't have a plastic bag in the car, of course... I'm not the same as I was, but I feel like I am more "myself" now, if that makes sense. The layers are peeling away and exposing the real me!