The Blues

Hi I had my surgery April 3, 07. I have lost 75lbs so far and I am suprised and happy about that. But for some reason I have been struggling with depression? Most days when I am at work I am fine but on the weekends I get very depressed, I dont understand this? Of course the first thing I want to do it eat, but that isnt very much help cause I cant eat much.lol I was thinking maybe I am just PMSing or something, but it still is lingering. I feel fat most of the time not any different even though people around me keep telling me how great I look and my clothes are to big. Its nice to hear that but I wish I could see it. Is this a common thing to happen?

I think still feeling fat is common - I know it's taken awhile for me to realize that I am no longer fat. You might be feeling depressed because your solace - food - has been taken away from you. I can relate - while I'm doing fine with the weight loss (77 pounds myself) and the new clothes and the other stuff, I have to admit feeling a little sad myself that my crutch is no longer available. Were you depressed before the surgery? I think depression contributed to my being fat in the first place... You might have to find a healthy substitute to help you through it. I'll be interested in seeing what others have to say. Marcia

hi I guess there were times when I was depressed before surgery. But I thought I had delt with all of that. I have been in therapy and doing all the things I should be doing. I try to walk instead of eating or sleep, but I would be sleeping all the time if I gave in to it. I try to take it a day at a time, but I just seem to get bogged down. I know I still have along way to go and its ok. But sometimes its harder then others.

Hi Cherri, I haven't had the same problem, but have heard from others in our local support group that it has been a problem for a couple of them, for their own individual reasons. Have you thought about talking to someone? Most companies have an EAP (employee assistance program) that will cover 3-5 free visits to a therapist. If you look into yours, you might find one that specializes in addiction recovery. I'm not suggesting that is your problem, but sometimes people who have WLS have found that those therapists that are familiar w/ the signs are more helpful than a regular MFT (marriage and family therapist), etc. I do hope you figure out what ails you, especially since these are your weekends and the best time to get out and enjoy the new 75-lbs-lighter you! Congrats on the incredible weight loss, by the way. That is fantastic. Take care of yourself and keep us posted on how you are doing. hugs, shana

Well I too can be depressed sometimes for no reason known and the only thing I can think is that when I am busy I do not think of food and then when I am not busy I want what everyone else wants ( to sit back and enjoy a snack that is not good for me). Well In time it will pass but one thing I have done what get some protien bars that taste great and I only eat them when I want a sweet FIX. Feeling fat thing well when I am retaining fluids I feel like this. Maybe you are pmsing or maybe you are getting too much salt intake.

Hi Cherri, not being able to turn to binging to cope with my feelings has been very hard for me, too. I still struggle to find something else to comfort myself that isn't a self-destructive transfer addiction. Lately when I feel down or upset, I put on my jammies and go to bed early. I know it's not the greatest solution, but it works for now and doesn't cause any harm. You probably do better at work because you are busy and don't have time to dwell on things, but when you get home you have to face your feelings. I'm seeing a therapist to deal with the emotional issues, and it has really helped me even more than I could have imagined. The issues of why we overate to the point of morbid obesity don't go away just because we had surgery-we need to work on them and get to the root of the problem. Being thinner doesn't make everything magically resolve! Annoying, but true. As for feeling fat, I know plenty of very thin women who feel fat, too. We're not alone! We just have to try to love ourselves and get out of that self-loathing pattern. Easier said than done, I know, but I believe we can do it!

I thought I had delt with all of the issues that . I have been in therapy and doing all the things I should be doing. I try to walk instead of eating or sleep, but I would be sleeping all the time if I gave in to it. I try to take it a day at a time, but I just seem to get bogged down. I know I still have along way to go and its ok. But sometimes its harder then others. I know that having the surgery doesnt solve the emotional issues and I have worked on them for many years, and actually put off having surgery until I was sure I was ready. I was doing really well up untill resently so I am not sure what changed?? I do appreciate all the suggestions and suport. thank you.. cherri

I understand, I do not have depression but suffer from anxiety. See your doctor, there may be some meds that will make you feel tons better. Don't suffer any longer. You have so much to be happy about.