need support

I have been to this site a handful of times, but just recently found that I can talk to other people that are 3-4 months out as well. I am having a hard time seeing the weight loss. This surgery has made me so hard on myself I dont give myself the credit that I have lost a lot of weight. I started out 316. Time of surgery I was 290, and as of yesterday I was 223. I'm only 3.5 months out. Number wise, I see it, but when I look at myself I dont. I know my husband tells me I look great, but thats his job, hubbys and moms always say those nice things. My in-laws are the only other ppl that ever say anything to me. Its not that I want every person that I ever cross paths with to comment on my weight, but it would be nice if someone noticed. My husband gets compliments all the time on his weight loss. Luckly for him he didnt need to have surgery like me, he just started going to the gym and eating healthy and he lost 60 in 10 months. I would show you my pic's, but they wont upload for me. Any words of wisdom?!? Anyone is the same boat?!? I really need to find a support team. Help Trish

I read a lot of posts that say almost exactly the same as yours. There are times when I forget that I have lost all the weight and still think that I am that same fat lady. I am still that same fat lady, I just don't look the same. We have to over come the fat lady mentality, and that will take some time. Your body is going through a lot now. There is stress in losing so much weight so quickly. If you don't see the weight loss, start taking measurements and then you will see definitively that not only are you losing pounds but inches as well. Call your surgeon and see if they can recommend a local support group. As soon as you are able upload some pics so we can all see the amazing difference. 67 pounds is nothing to sneeze at, you should be proud of yourself!!

At 67 pounds you're right there with the rest of the A-team (those of us who had the surgery in April.) Your comments are interesting. I can see the weight loss, but I don't really feel any differently, and I thought I would. It's like I'm still the same fat chick I've always been. I assume you are in smaller clothes? If you haven't gone and at least tried on some smaller sizes, you might think about making a trip to the store, because that helps, some. Doesn't it kill you the way men can give up eating, say, one piece of bread or a grain of rice a day and immediately lose 60 pounds? Ok, I know it was harder than that, but that's the way it seems sometimes. One of the things I remember from Weigh****chers is that people generally don't notice a weight loss until you've lost at least 10% of your original weight. But you've lost twice that, so I guess that blows that theory. Maybe your friends haven't said anything because they're afraid to...like maybe what's going through their minds is "Do I dare say anything? She's lost so much weight...I hope she's not sick. OMG, you don't suppose she has cancer or anything do you?" Believe your husband and believe your in-laws - they're not just being nice. Heck, my Mom certainly let me know when I was gaining weight - she's thrilled that I'm losing it now. Marcia

Thats so true about men...they can darn near sneeze and lose a pound! I know I have dropped sizes. I went from a 26 to now my 18's are loose. I think now I'm looking at myself more critical. Like the tummy after having 2 kids. For some reason just blended in before, but now that I lost some weight, I notice it even more. I guess I feel like I'm not losing enough or fast enough. I've compared myself to some other women that were also 5'9 and starting weight was about the same, and I"m not losing as much as they were. My surgeon wasnt much help when it came to guidelines or giving me a goal. I've had to make up my own. So is everyone else that had surgery in April at about the same weight loss?? I guess thats true...ppl probably are not saying anything because it would be akward, what if I did have something serious wrong. My mom was kind enough to tell me that I looked like I gained even more weight when I saw her one christmas. So I guess your right, I should believe them when they tell me I look great. Thank you so very much. I guess I just needed to meet more ppl in the "A-team" Trish

I know the feeling!!I am 5'9 and have lost 75 pounds but that was with the liquid diet and bowel prep. I have lost 67 since surgery. I still fit in my clothes and even after losing 75 pounds! Believe me it makes it hard to stay positive. I also don't talk to many people. I was a hermit as the pounds went on. I don't get as many comments. I do on here though I put my before and after pictures on every month. When you can upload you can see the difference for your self!!! Welcome to the A-Team Dee

Thanks Dee for the great words of advise. If you need smaller sizes, I think I still have some. I tried to get ride of all my big clothes right away. But I do have some cool Lane Bryant caprie pants in size 24. And I have plenty of jeans. I kept one of my 26's for reference. But I still have plenty of 24's. As for my pic I'm not sure if we take the pic too big, cuz when I try to upload pics it just keeps telling me they are too big. I dont know how to make them smaller.

I am always up for clothes!! I can't afford clothes because I have a car payment (my surgery) each month and it drains every extra penny! I tried on 24 today and they fit well they were streach 24 from the avenue, but they did fit. I can still wear my 26/28 pull on shorts(shouldn't they fall off by now errrrr) Thank you again for the offer!!! dee

You can use photo shop to make them smaller. I think they need to be around 100 pixels by 100 pixels. My avatar is about 110 by 100 pixels. Hope that helps. Can't wait to see the pics!

Tricia; You are right on track baby! Remember, a lot of A-teamers had the surgery at the beginning of April while we were towards the end. That means they had as may as 3 extra weeks to lose. I am 5'10" so we are almost the same height. Our surgery was the same day. I am THRILLED to say I have lost 65 lbs. We had almost the same weight at 282 for me and 290 for you. So, take a deep breath. You are exactly where you should be. I think my weight loss has been fantastic-I think yours has been too!

Thank you sooo very much!!! I am so happy that I found all of you. I think this is what I was missing....ppl going through the same thing at the same time. (give or take) I'm so excited about the weight loss, I guess I needed the support of others and to help point out that in fact I do look smaller. Thank you so much for being there. I'm definitely sticking around to be part of the team. Trish