Gastric Bypass- Public or PRIVATE?

Does anyone here have issues with wanting to keep their gastric bypass private? For example, I wanted only my close friends, immediate family and select co-workers to know... My mom, who is the town crier, has recently revealed to me that she told the ENTIRE family. I have a huge family... So this means that half the NYC tri-state area knows about my flatulence and hair falling out. Anyway, anyone here have a similar experience they want to share? Rather than flipping on the town crier, I thought I would vent here with you guys...

I don't have a problem telling someone that I had the surgery. Of course, I don't go around announcing it, but if someone asks how I have lost the weight, I tell them. If they just say, you've lost weight, I will just say thank you. My whole family knows that I have had the surgery, and I am fine with that. They have all been very supportive.

I kept it fairly private. My immediate family, one co-worker and one friend. I just did not want to deal with uninformed and ignorant advice. How many times have we heard about the poeple who gained all their weight back or died whenever this subject comes up? It just gets old. As time goes by, I have started to open up to a few when they ask. Mainly, I just answer that I stopped eating when they ask how I lost the weight. If pressed for more, I tell them that I got off soda, sugar and all refined carbs. That usually stops them. (by the way-this is All true). I am getting so much more confidence. Success breeds success and it is easier to have the confidence in myself and my decisions. It is a slow learning process. I can relate to the story of your Mom. My husband had trouble keeping his mouth shut. He was so excited for me. I told him this was MY secret and he needed to stop! I did find out about some people who work in another dept who came onto OH and then were blabbing about me in the middle of their office. Luckily, they were overheard by the one co-worker who knew, so I called them and told them this was my online support group and that the things I posted were private. I would be more than happy to dicuss my surgery privately but I would appreciate them keeping their mouths shut in the office. It appears to have worked. Good Luck, You might have to brace yourself the next time the family gets together.

For me, private. I copied the paragraph below from my blog, but it gives my thoughts on the situation. Basically: 1. It is not my responsibility to educate the public on WLS just because I had it. 2. I should not be subject to people's negative opinions or hurtful comments because I had WLS. It is my business. So let's discuss that point a little further. To tell or not to tell?? I decided to only tell my immediate family - mom, dad, brothers and their wives. To me, nobody else needed to know. I have all of the support I need. Plus, I did tell one acquaintance early on (my hairdresser) and she proceeded to tell me several horror stories about people who had RNY. No thanks. Keep your negativity to yourself. This has been going AWESOME for me. How come no one ever tells you that?? Now, if I knew an MO person (or someone with an MO loved one) who I thought had a genuine interest in RNY, I would be happy to disclose and discuss. But for the general public, who just want the inside scoop on the "easy way out", they can read a book or talk to someone else. I am not interested in being known as "the girl who had that weight loss surgery". There are much more interesting things about me. If I am asked how I am losing weight, my answer is with a very restrictive diet and exercise. This is absolutely a true statement. If I am asked directly if I had WLS (which has only happened at work), my answer is that the question is inappropriate. And it is. They can draw whatever conclusions they want. I am sorry about your Mother. If I was in your situation, I would be angry.

For me...I've been pretty public about it. All my family knows, lots of co-workers, friends and my church family knows. I had everyone praying for me and sending me good vibes while I was at the hospital. It worked. My surgery and recovery has been very seemless. I've been lucky and everyone has been very supportive. I do have one friend that has "distant" herself from me. But hopefully with time we'll reconnect. I still pray for her as she too is struggling with her weight and self imagine. I mentor anyone who asks about the surgery. I have 2 sons and they pretty much told everyone they ran into at the ballfield about my surgery while I was at the hospital!!! :>) When I made it back to the ballfield a week or so later, I had lots of folks asking about me and giving me lots of support. For me, it's been "the more the merrier"

My story is simular to Tammy's!!! I haven't kept it a secret at all... all of my relatives, my church friends, and other close friends all know about my WLS. They are all very supportive and I've only heard a few negative concerns... but I can be pretty intimidating if necessary, so I shut them down pretty quick. I've had some of my overweight friends husbands tell their them they should get the same surgery I did. YIKES! I yelled at those husbands and told them to never say that to their wives again. I make it very clear that WLS isn't for everyone. Sheesh, that makes me feel bad when they do that. I fear they are going to tick of their wives as they go on raving about the new skinnier me. Makes me feel funny. Other than that I've had great support from everyone and I don't mind sharing with people about what I had done and putting the myth of people dying who have this surgery to rest. So I'm with Tammy.... "the more the merrier!" Cheers!

Oh, that was a tough one for me. Most un-manly having "cosmetic" surgery. I work in a testosterone rich environment. ( Skilled trades, factory). I was pretty worried about how the fellas would take the news. I announced I was having surgery... again. They asked why, and I told them. Honesty, no matter how much it hurts, is the right policy for me. They accepted it surprisingly well. Minimal harrasment- but all up front. No whispering and giggling behind my back. Now it's pretty much a non-issue in the shop. My Mom and Dad. Vehemently against it. More afraid about me having this surgery than my brain surgery the year before. Now they're coming around. My Mom and sister are going through pre-op testing now. Bottom-line. If people ask me, I tell them. I'm not ashamed of my desicion. Quite the opposite. It's THE best thing I've ever done for myself. I don't understand why there is such a stygma attached to it. DD

I am completely opened here about my surgery. I however did not announce on my my space I felt that is different. Well my best friend not only tells everyone but she made a blog about it on her site so now hundreds of strangers know. I don't hide it if people ask, but I don't volunteer it either.

Definitely public, but not like an activist. If people ask how I've lost weight, I tell them - and let them know it was risky, but the best decision I've ever made (short of choosing my wife, and having my beautiful 3 girls). Folks react from "ignorant" ie "you mean they took your stomach out and now you can't eat", to "I've got a relative that did great with WLS". I've just got to preach the truth around here - without sugarcoating it.

Well now that people know.. Use this to help others when they ask you about tell then the truth. You will be suprised at the untrue believes that are out there. So use it to educate others.