I'm feeling mean instead of lean!!!

I am down on myself. I am only down 87 pounds since surgery (4-5-05) and KNOW I can do better!!! This was my BIGGEST fear before surgery - that I would sabotage myself by eating the wrong things! And I'm mad because a friend of mine just had WLS last week, and she's rubbing it in about how much easier things are for her than they were for me. I should be supportive, not competitive. I need to focus on my own recovery, not hers! So, I've returned to this message board because it's so encouraging, and that's what I need right now! Thanks to all who listened (well, read.) Melody Cotrel RNY 4-5-05 Top 331 315/228/150

I know you've heard it a million times, but everyone loses at different rates. It's normal to feel jealous of others loss, but you have to remember where you started and where you are now. Compare yourself to those around you in real life, and not on here. When you go out in public (and I know this sounds horrible, but it's therapy), but find the biggest person around and compare yourself to them. Remember where you came from, and be glad you're 87 lbs thinner. 87 lbs is A LOT of weight. Have you ever carried around something in your arms that's even close to that weight? Probably not, because you wouldn't be able to lift it... that's what you were carrying around daily on your body. Your body, though you may not be at goal yet, is VERY greatful that you've done what you've done. If you're afraid your not done losing, don't worry... you're not done. Your body will stop when it's done, but you have to give it a little boost now and then. Change your diet, because even if you've been on a real strict diet since surgery, your body will get used to whatever you're on and eventually stop losing, just because it's become accustomed to what you're eating. If you haven't been eating right, and you can admit it... then change. Start eating healthier things, start working out a little harder, just mix it up for your body and get it jumped on losing again. With our new pouches, it's made easy for us to jump start weightloss, all you have to do is crank the engine, and let it rip. Your body knows it's not done losing, you just have to give it a little incentive. Obviously the surgery did what it's supposed to do for you, you just have to keep it going until it's done, and then pick up fix and repairs for the rest of your life... which has been made very easy for us now. Pick a "scary weight" for yourself, and if you creep up to that weight in the future, jump back on a treadmill and start eating less carbs. Your surgery will do what it's supposed to do if you use it right. It's okay to eat wrong once in a while, as long as it's not all the time. We've all learned our lessons with the wrong food, but that doesn't mean that we have to never eat it again... just be cautious and know when to stop. Congratulations on your loss thus far. You've done a tremendous job. There are millions of people that would give anything to do what you've done, and you've done it! Great job!

Everything Katie said is true... Don't beat yourself up. Try not to dwell on how far you have to go, dwell on how far you've already come. I too sometimes sabotage my efforts by eating the wrong things. I never craved sugar before WLS, now, all I want is Twinkies and other awful things like that. I have them occasionally, but I supplement with protein and water. When I crave those things, I know it's time to shake up my routine a bit: change the time of my vegatables, cut out some carbs, have a protein bar...something so my body doesn't want sugar. Here a saying I read recently: "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels." I have it written on a post-it and keep it on my fridge next to a picture on myself at 250 pounds. Be kind but firm to yourself. We're our own worst enemies...but Obesity Help is here to help... Stay focused and keep sharing, L*

Hi Melody. well with friends like her you dont need enemies. Listen , you are doing fine, in fact you have lost 30 lbs more than me. I am very strict with myself and only let myself slip up occasionally so please try to be happy where you are. Keep coming here and we are all honest with one another and give each other terrific support. I cant be done losing yet, I just cant be. I will not have gone through all of this to be stuck. keep your chin up and get right back to it today. hugs from down under Helen

Tell your so called friend to drop dead and then just walk away. Sometimes we can only concentrate on our own needs because we have no energy left over to spare for toxic sponge "friends".

Hello surgery sister! I've also lost 87 lbs. since 4/5/05! I know I started lower than you but I still think it's great. There are times I would like to give up and just eat everything, but my stomach just doesn't let me. Keep a food journal and don't graze!! You can do it!

Melody: Cheer up girl, 87 lbs. is great, that is less than you were a year ago. I had gastric bypass in January of 2003 started at 440 and now down to 220 am at a stand still but feel great, think about all the things you can do now you could not do in the past, protein is the key and that is what I am going to do protein shakes and meat, that is where it is. Cheer up you are doing great. Linda