Are any of you dreading your 1 yr check up?

I have my one year post op on March 21st (surgery date was 03/20/07). I have lost 91 lbs if my scale is right compared to my surgeons. I know that is no where near what I should have lost by now. I have not made a commitment to exercise and old eating habits are a constant battle for me. I also struggle to follow a regular routine of protein and supplements. It almost seems as if I constantly sabatoge my success without doing it purposely. I am dreading going in for my post op. At my 6 month they told me I was losing slow and so I can just imagine what they will say when I go back. Honestly I have even thought of canceling the appointment and not worrying about it. I was curious if I am the only one experiencing this. I know that I have lost a lot and some have lost less than me and are at their goal weight because they had a lot less to lose. I know I shouldn't be comparing myself to anyone else for that reason. For some to lose 91 lbs would put them well under goal. Someone close to me had surgery a month before I did. She started at 191 and is down to 111 and wearing a size 4 which is too big for her sometimes. A friend of hers had surgery about 6 months ago and started at about the same weight she did and is down to a size 8 already. My stomach is really big and that keeps me out of the smaller sizes so I have yet to be completely comfortable in all size 18's. Granted, I started at 26/28 so I have made progress, but I am not where I expected to be at a year out. I thought I would be in a much smaller size by now. I know I need to made a strong commitment to changing completely and that is so much easier said than done. Sometimes I feel like this is just one more failed attempt and that I will never see the single digit sizes. I also know that I don't have very long before my appointment to get much closer to where I should be by now. Sorry to go on so long. I just had to get it out for a minute. Thanks for listening. Jenifer

I totally wanted to be a smaller size. A bikini and REALLY THIN were definitely on my list of things to do. I am a size 16 and trying to accept that. My weight is slowly creeping back up, too, but I am well on my way to getting back on track. Try not to dread the doc visit. He is your weight loss doctor and may be able to offer you some suggestions, support and help. Even if it's a kick in the butt, it may help. I do understand being embarassed for them to see you or the # on the scale, though....but tough it out and go. If for no other reason to get a good assesment of where you are at right now. I don't believe that you need to make a "strong commitment to change completely". That is way too overwhelming for me and I won't ever stick to it. How about picking one new habit that you are going to make over the next 2 weeks? You could deicde to take your vitamins every day for 2 weeks, that is the commitment until it is a habit that you don't need to think about.....strings on your fingers, notes on the bathroom mirror, whatever it takes for 2 weeks until you have developed that habit. THEN move on to water, excercise, food journals etc etc. one at a time, taking 2 weeks for each to develop the new habit. Be as nice to yourself as you can be, be reassuring and gentle. We have all had more than our fair share of self loathing and abuse from that voice in our head. Baby steps, start from where you are at and try to be reassuring and patient with yourself. Good Luck Wendy

Thank you so much Wendy. Those are awesome suggestions and I have decided that I will definitely keep the appointment. I have done a little better with a lot of different things that I posted about every since I made the post. I guess I just needed to see it "on paper" for the hundreth time. I have posted about it and blogged about it until I am blue in the fingers (haha) and just didn't change but I can see the progress in the right direction. Thank you for taking time to respond to my post. Jenifer

Hi there Jenifer, I am also dreading it, but figure well I have done ok (over half way to my goal) and like you say wth having less to lose that is only 40 pounds for me, but I am 5 foot, and still a size 14, so yes I still have a way to go yet, not in numbers on the scale but certainly in clothing sizes.... It is frustrating, I too feel like I could have done better if only.... I had got off my butt and exercised etc etc and I am getting there now, but the scales have not moved in so long, I start to eat rubbish because of that... Damn head and emotional eating... Anyway we were banded the same day and I say a big congrats to you Hon you blow me out of the water in weight lost in the one year thats for sure! I will PM you if you feel like talking more.... Karen

Hey Karen. I had the bypass so that is why I have lost more than you have. It sounds like you have worked really hard and that will pay off in the end. It is great that you have been motivated. We can definitely stay in touch. I am going in to accept your friends request. Thank you for the encouragement. I hope that things start to pick up for you again soon. Jenifer

Hello well I know that we all should be where the Dr's think we should be but we have to live in these heads of our's and some days they say really stupid stuff to us like oh you will eat that and just go crap it out anyways so then you eat it and guess what thats what did stay in your pouch and made you gain a pound over night!!!!!!!! I KNOW where your coming from I haven't made my year check up app yet just for the same reasons!!!!!!! When I was there at 6 months out he said get your ass in the gym I said I do he said NOT enough and I did for 2 weeks after 5 days a week then it went to 2 days a week and now I haven't been there in a week!!!!! I know who am I hurting myself! Well don't think you are alone I am right there with ya! I am going to make my app today! thanks for posting!!!! Shirley

Hey Shirley. I posted that I have been doing all the right stuff since I posted and my weight has gone up 2 lbs. I don't get it. I guess for me drinking the protein and stuff makes me gain weight??? Oh well, at least I am giving it my best shot. At least you are going to the gym. Your doc should be happy that you are doing that. I can't afford it and I just don't have any time in my schedule right now to do it. They make our appts for us so that we can't say we forgot and it has to be within so many days of the surgery anniversary for insurance to consider it as part of my follow up. It was like that with the 6 month and the other check ups. I hope things get better for you. I know they will. Just keep chugging along and we can all be here for each other. Jenifer

Your story sounds alot like mine. I had my gastric bypass on March 15th 2007. I have gone from 298 to about 290. So that's 108 lbs. I am 5'10". I went from a tight 28 to a comfy size 18 (most of my weight is in my belly). I lost all my weight in about the first 7 months and haven't lost anymore after that. I have lost some inches and certain parts seem slimer but nothing on the scale. Sometimes I feel like I should really try to lose more weight and then I pull out some old photos of myself and I realise how far I have come. I feel so much better and can do so much more than I used to. I think I work hard at trying to be positive instead of focusing on how much better things could be. I would like to eat a bit better and work out to get stronger and healtheir...I wouldn't mind if a few extra rolls weren't so big! But I don't try and dwell on it. I'm happy with how far I have come and try and remind myself of that as often as I can. I figure when I am really not happy with where I am that will be when I can start trying harder. I definetly agree with the other poster who said to just try one new behavior change at a time then move on to something else. Don't set yourself up for failure. You have done awesome...you've lost 91 pounds...that's alot! Now that you want to push further and do better...then start a little at a time. You need to make life long habits not push yourself too hard for a little while...you'll get some results but they won't stay for the long haul. Don't worry...your completely normal!!! Good luck with getting the results you want.

JENNIFER I hope you see this GET OFF YOUR BACK Girl you have lost 91 lbs!!!!! And you are in a size 18 instead of a 26/28! Congratulations!!!!! And I bet that you cant gain 12 pounds in a day now either! I am one year on the 28th. I dread the year mark because it resonates "you will lose your weight in the first year" and that translates in my mind to "your time is up" and "you didn't even try,you didn't go to the gym, you didn't drink water, you didn't ________-" (put whatever there) Then I remember oh yea I have been pretty busy over the last year , I mean, it isn't easy waking up after surgery and realizing in the next weeks and months that I still think I am ME but I have to adjust to being ME and also be a good "weight loss success person" and on the way somewhere I turned into someone who "people don't recognize because I look so different" and at times during the last year it has felt like being in one of those movies where a guy goes into a coma and wakes up and has a totally new life, I don't know if you have any idea what I mean, but my point is, You have done perfect And you have already met success And the future holds more for you Size does matter but pleasure or pain success or gain don't let anyone tell you your time is up Your friend ang

I know the feeling. I just had my 1 year visit on Monday. I am totally comfortable with where I am although I know I could have probably lost more. I didn't dread the visit but I left frustrated because the new "fellow" of my surgeon that I saw made it seem like I was not doing good at all. I've lost 117 lbs. In my book that is great! He can go jump in a lake!! Its hard though, talk to your doc or a nutritionist for help if you need it. Asking for help is not failing! Good luck!