questions and help

I recently lost my Dad to cancer. For months, I have been pouring every part of my life into helping take care of him. In the process, I ate whatever and whenever I could. I developed very bad habits and stopped exercise altogether...(didn't have time, was at his house and worried about him). It has been 3 weeks. I weighed the past few months and didn't gain any weight. Yesterday I got in the scales...I am almost 10 lbs up from where I was. SCARY!!! So, I try to start back on track....I can't seem to do it. I just eat and stay inside this house. I don't know what to do. I'm afraid of the weight gain, extremely depressed over it, but can't stop eating...because it has become an emotional thing. I am 35 years old. Have no parents, grandparents, kids, etc... I do have a husband...even he has gained weight the past few months. he lost his mom 6 months ago. I'm really afraid....what would you do????

I am sorry for your loss. It sounds like you know why you are eating---emotions Have you considered grief counseling or some sort of support group for you and your husband? You two have had great losses in less then a year. If you find yourself snacking try to snack on fruit and veggies Snack on protein--I like to eat pepperonni chips--I stick them in the microwave to get them krispy. If you like aweets try protein bars I eat Atkins Advantage bars-the 1.5 oz size they only have 150 cals 19 grs carbs 9 grms of fiber so 10 net carbs 1 grm of sugar and 11 grms of protein. Try going for walks with your husband. Good Luck MJ

Lisa - I am so sorry for your loss. It has been a tough year for both you and your husband. If you are so much like all of us, food has always been a way of healing your pain and in addition we became addicted to the good tastes of food and that made you feel good. That is why the majority of us faced this surgery and had it done. As all the experts say, this surgery only gives us a tool, but unfortunately it does not fix the head problems associated with a life time of abusive eating patterns. Sometimes I think I would like to have the surgery again (of course you cannot) but those first few months there was no hunger, you had to force yourself to eat. Too bad that isn't the case now. I don't have any great suggestions because I find myself facing some of the former deamons that got me obese in the first place. The only difference is I don't eat sugar and sweets and bread, I just find it to easy to snack on the supposedly good things - protein bars, nuts, and those blame no sugar added fudgesicles! My husband always has this saying that drives me nuts..."too much of anything isn't good for you"....well I suppose in theory that is correct. Read a few posts back that I submitted about if our tool is still working or not and perhaps try that 5 day tool diet. I am thinking I will do that this week and see if I can't jump start myself again. I don't think I have lost anything in 3 months, but I haven't gained anything either. 10 pounds you gained is not so much that it can't be reversed right now and you can continue going towards your goal. Take care of yourself...you may much family left, but you have an entire family of MARCHers who are here for you and you do have your wonderful husband...think how sad you would be if you didn't have him - you have each other. So get back on track now, keep in touch with your MARCHers here - we love you and we are here for you. Maybe you would like to join in STYLZ's "WDYET" post. Of course I talk big - I read it every day but I fail to post myself...but it does seem to atleast keep you thinking on track! I have an idea for exercise - you and hubby walk on up to NH and take those blame nuts away from me and my NSA fudgesicles. (Thank you Stephanie Smiles for turning me on to them!!!!) Many thoughts, prayers and hugs are going out to you. Don't be a stranger here - we are all here for each other. Barbara

Lisa- Don't be scared Its NOT TOO LATE! The first step was realizing what happened (which you've done by posting this). You have been grieving, you have been stressed and emotional, and you have been distracted. Its ok and completely normal! Like the previous Marchers have said, you have family support here. This site can be very helpful... just try to go back to the way you ate right after surgery. Protein first, plenty of water, no sugar, etc. Hopefully your hubby will join you in this re-focusing of your life. Both of you can bond together even closer now. Keep us updated *hugs*