a time for honesty

ok I just have to ask since it has been brought to my attention this weekend...how many of us are wearing clothes that are either too revealling or inappropriate to others standards? since I've lost the weight I have gotten a lot of new clothes and most have come from my sister, nieces or cousin's, my mother has picked up here or there in fact I have bought very little except for work clothes. Anyway....my sister today tells me since no one else has the guts to tell me she'd tell me whatever one is thinking...I shouldn't be wearing belly shirts...now for starters all of my shirts reach the top of my pants...they may not when I raise my arms above my head but they do when my arms are down. She also went on to tell me I should not wear a 2 piece and my shorts are too short...which of course are the shorts my other sister gave me. That I should cover my stomach because of the stretch marks, my legs because of the vericose veins. Now I am having a hard time with this because I am proud of the new me and want to look young...I am only 34 but I try to make a point ot be COVERED. I don't know how to take this coming from someone who had a boob job and went from not even an A to a D and has her hair done every 2 weeks. Anyway...you'd have to know the history there, but my point is this...are we wearing stuff we shouldn't be or are we wearing stuff THEY think we shouldn't be...man I hope that makes sense. Mimi

Hi Mimi I understand what you are saying. First let me say just looked @ your pictures and honestly you look wonderful!! If you feel good in something I say wear it. With all due respect to the person who made the comment to you and please don't think I m trying to jude her but she sounds like she is trying to find perfection and I think most of us know that the only perfection we are ever going to find is to truly be happy with ourselves. I had a situation this weekend with a family get together and saw alot of people I havn't seen in a long while and people that I never even met. So let me share some of the comments. I am going to be 54 next month and my son is 34 point being at least 5 of hs friends who I have never met untill then asked who I was he told them thats my mom they were shocked and told him I was HOT. I would be lieing if I said it didn't make me feel good cuz it sure did!. Now the other point is the same night my sister looked and me and said OH my gosh you look like a twig are you sure you feel ok (heck ya I feel ok ) Do you think its hard for our family to get use to seeing us differn't and looking good? I don't know what the answer is but what it boils down to is if we feel good in something wear it cuz confidence and liking ourselves is what it's all about baby!! I am sorry if I am rambeling on but I would like to say I have read most of your post for as long as you have been on here and even though I have never met you in person I can tell you are an amazing person and beautifull both inside and out. I wish we lived closer because you seem to be the type of friend I would cherish in my life! Take Care Jan

I so glad I am not alone...i thought I was wearring things that looked good and made me feel good...I never dreamed it would embarass my sister as she put...she actually told me she wouldn't invite my children and I to go to the pool with her because she was afraid i would wear a bikini and embarass her...my thought is WHO CARES!...well appreantly her

I think this is something that we all have dealt with or will deal with in the future. I definitely can relate to this issue. I am wearing things that I have never had guts to wear before losing 130 pounds. I personally do not see anything wrong with it. If you feel comfortable, forget about what others think. I can't wait to get down some more so that I can wear other clothing that I have always wanted to wear or dream of wearing. ( : ) LaVette

boy i think you got it right...I am wearing things I have only ever dreamed of...granted I probably would look better if I waited until I had PS, but who knows if I'll ever get to. Thanks for the encouragement to go on wearing what makes me happy

I looked at a few of your pics and your tummy looks so flat!! You should be really proud. I am tall like you (5' 10") and have lost 127 pounds but I have a flabby tire around my waist. What weight are you at now??? You look great, and you should wear what you feel comfortable in....HELL show off your new body!! Your arms look great too!! I just had my arms done cuz that was the one thing that bothered me the most. I can cover my tummy, I can cover the upper legs but I was so tired of wearing long sleeves YEAR ROUND!! Second best thing Ive done!! Good Luck and you look great.

CONGRATULATIONS!!! I would love to have a lower body lift...maybe one day. I am holding at 155, I do bounce back and forth between 150 and 160 but stay at 155 for the most part. I have to say I do have a flat stomach...but it is very wrinkley from teh stretch marks...which is why I do cover it when i am at work or in public...except for at the pool...i'm there to get a tan dang it! Mimi

I want to see before and after pics of your arms!!! This is something I am thinking of doing...

Mimi You look wonderful and all the nay sayers are just being mean! Jealousy is a crazy thing! My daughter and I are always mistaken for sisters. I dress like she does and I dont CARE who says what! We just combined our closets since we are in the exact same size. She has alot of "younger" looking trendy clothes that I wouldn't wear only for the fact that I dont want to be old yet trying to look young, but for the most part I wear whatever I choose! I have a nice body now and although i'm married and not looking for men, I dress the way I want and the hell with whatever anyone else might say. I do stay rather concervative, I dont show off my boobs and such, but I do wear really nice clingy clothes that make ME feel good about MYSELF! Dont let anyone tell you what to wear and how to dress! Enjoy your new body. Wear that BIKINI PROUDLY!!!!!!!! Trish

Hi Mimi, I totally understand what you are saying. First of all, I will admit that I am beginning to wear clothes that are more revealing, but not at all inappropriate. I don't have a lot of boobs to speak of but I am still proud to wear blouses that are not up to my neck. I am also no longer into super long shirts to hide my hips/butt. I am not totally satisfied with my hips/thighs (as many of you have seen me complain about) but I am still happy that I am much smaller now and not afraid if my shirts only come to my waist. There is nothing wrong with that. We have worked hard to get here. Many of us have never been able to enjoy cute clothes, having been overweight most of our lives. We have earned the right to wear clothes that we feel we look good in. Tell your sister that she can keep her opinions to herself. If you are comfortable in a 2piece swimsuit, then wear it! The only opinions you should listen to are your husband and kids. Your husband because of obvious reasons (I mean, I dress to impress him so I think he should like what I wear) and your kids because they are usually brutally honest with us. I know mine are. They will tell me if I am wearing something that doesn't look good. And they also compliment me when I am wearing something new or daring and are proud of their mom. They were the first ones to tell me I needed new clothes because all of my other clothes were too big. Of course now they are telling me to stop buying so many clothes... I need to heed their advise on that one. Hugs, Robin