Someone Help Me here,.. PLEASE!

Thanks Darlene, You are right she is an idiot. I am just worried about my mom's friendship with her. We have in the past just ignored the rude comments but that was down right evil last night. Mom mom was upset but she said that Mrs. M probably pushed me to say those things and that the truth would have come out soon enough. I feel much better today. Thanks for the encouragement Steph

Oh my! I can't believe someone would think that they have the right to tell you how you should be handling your journey! I'm so sorry that this happened. I am a "slow loser" too. It's not because of my behavior. It's just my reality. Do I hate it? Sometimes. Is it frustrating? Definitely. But, I don't think "76 pounds" and "only" belong in the same sentence. How can 76 pounds be "only" anything?! I'm happy that others have lost over 100 pounds since surgery! That's fantastic! You and I (and others) will get there when we get there. You should have seen me this morning! Today is my 8-month surgiversary and I "only" lost five pounds last month. I was in tears after stepping on that stupid scale. I desperately wanted to maintain my trend of seven pounds a month. So desperate, in fact, that I spent extra time at the gym last week. Unfortunately, that didn't seem to help. After I gave myself a very intense pep talk, I dried the tears and got ready for work. In reality, my husband will not love me less because I lost five pounds instead of seven this past month. I will not be less productive at work today due to losing two fewer pounds. In fact, nothing is really different. I'm continuing to lose weight and that's a good thing. Let me tell you, if I had run into someone this morning who made comments to me like you received, I most likely would have lost it too!!!! I hope that you can remain strong in your own success. You really are doing so well and I am very proud of all of your accomplishments! Hugs, Stephanie

Stephanie, Happy Surgiversary!!!! Its comforting to know that even though you are this positive totally lovely person that it upsets you too. I swear if I had your number I would have called you. I was soo hurt last night. I thought to just email this to you but I decided that I would get a general feel from the boards to see if I overreacted which I knew I did I just needed someone to say that they understood and had my virtual back so to speak. Because I know when I go home for the hoidays it would be bad and all my fault,.. But,.. I will press on and do my own thing thanks for your support as always I don't really know you but I know you,.. if I you get my drift! The other Steph

I am so sorry you had to go through that. Your friend was totally wrong to speak to you that way. We are all individuals and we will all lose at different rates. You know in your heart what you are doing to be a success with your wls. You are a success. Sounds like she has gotten ****y and feels she can tell others what to do and not have to do those things herself. She will pay for it in the end. It's always hard to face others after we have lost it around them. But those who are your true friends will still love you. Those who don't still love you were probably not your friends to begin with. Love and forgive yourself. Tomorrow is a new day with new opportunities. Hang in there. You can turn to us for support anytime! Hugs, Robin

Awe Robin,.. Thanks for the sweet words! I will forgive myself!! You Rock! Steph

regardless of your "friends" intent a public place was the WRONG place to "tell you something you need to hear" yeah girl you did explode!! but some times that happens - all you can do afterwards is pick up the peices - if you contiune a realationship with any of those envolved you are going to have to aplogise for blowing up in public at the very least. if you are doing what your doc says then that is all you can do. my doc said that after 4-6 months 10 pounds a month or even 2 pounds a week is good. I know you work out hard - maybe you can up your intensity on the eliptical for a few mins here and there - I do level 5 but up it to 6-8 for from 30 seconds to 90 seconds a the time and while up a level try to push from my normal 5 mph to between 6 nad 12 yep girl I hit 12 a couple of times - now that one I can hold for 30 seconds MAX but I am off my platue agian so maybe that will work for you. it does not seem like you are that far from goal - I have over 70 pounds still to lose. hugs sweetie have a cup of hot tea and a warm bath, curl up with a good book or movie and sip your tea and remember YOU ARE OK - you are a daughter of God and you are LOVED. yes you may have over reacted but I don't see that your "friend" was in the right either - hope this helps - feel free to email me if you need to vent more hugs danni

Danni thats weird that you said that because just last week I started playing around with the ramp and the resistance on both the elliptical and the treadmill. I also vary the programs I was taking a belly dance class its over now and my kick boxing starts next Tue 2 a week for an hour and I will be taking another dance class in December so I am trying to get more active. Maybe this will help! I am going to read a good book tonight after I work out!! Steph

Steph.....You hold your head high and keep on doing what you are doing. You had every right to throw those darts back at her! We are all unique and individually made. She has some pretty big insecurities, self-esteem issues and a mean-streak in her comments toward you. You take the high road girl and keep on keeping on! I've never understood why some people feel that they make themselves feel better by tearing somebody else down! Especially a surgery sister who knows the very real issues we all had that brought us to have the surgery in the first place. We all need ENCOURAGEMENT, not discouragement! You keep on smiling through the disappointing times. You are emerging like a beautiful butterfly and will be fluttering joyfully for the rest of your life! Tamara 310/212/150 3/21/06

Thanks Tamara! You look great,. Good Job!

Hey I just wanted to say I am so sorry that happend to you. I just speak to you as a sister in the lord right now that when I read your profile I could so tell you were being set up by the enmey .That Girl was eewww!!! She needed to be put in her place!! You did start responding correctley it was okay for you to be angery. and stand up for your self. then it went some place dark when you mentioned the affair. I dont think you need to appoligise for the first part of what you said at all but the rest you do. It was just coming from the hurt and the wounding From that nasty girl. You no that all you can do is say sorry for your part if they choose not forgive its on them! I want to encourage you to about your weightloss so what if its slow your body has time to adjust to the weight loss that way. your still losing youll keep losing until body says its done. You have relly learned better habits and are taking care of yourself you may not be a waif but you are healthy!!! and you look great!!!!!!!!!!! a 14 is small if you hadnt had the surgery you would not be that size or healthy. You have made awsome peminit changes!! KEEP IT UP!!!! dont look at the stupid numbers. we are all so differant ! are body shapes where we carry fat if you had alot of fat on your butt its slower to lose. Keep your chin up !!! You no dont beat yourself up about what happened just repent to God and let it go!! HIS GRACE IS BIG!!!! Lizzey