emotional roller coaster

HELP!!! Is anyone else experienced being on an emotional roller coaster? I had surgery 3/30/05 & did great for 3 weeks. Then I developed a stricture which ended me up in the hospital for 5 days, was released 4/26/05. I find that I am so tired and just not able to control my emotions. The smallest things seem to cause a melt down. I am able to eat soft foods, but still struggling with eating and drinking separately so I don't throw up. Any idea how long this will last. I knew it would be hard, but I just don't feel like myself anymore. I'm trying to be patient, but feel like I'm failing. Any one else feeling like this?

I don't know much about strictures or what you went through in the hospital the second time. But I can tell you for 3-4 weeks after my surgery I was an emotional mess. I cried over everything and couldn't deal with anything. I blamed it on the aesthesia and/or the morphine. I was very frustated also but it eventually wore off. I hope you feel better soon, stay strong, you'll be fine! I wish you well!

Suzy, I am sorry you are going through an emotional time right now. I know I have definitely gone through a hard time emotionally myself. I am sure everyone has at one point or another. This is a HUGE change to our bodies and our lives and it is far from easy. You need to just take it one day at a time and you will pull through.You have been through alot! Give yourself some credit.Mentally, it has been really difficult because I looked to food for comfort and now when something goes wrong- I don't have that comfort there anymore. This is a life change that is going to take some time to adjust to. I think not being able to drink with my meals has been one of the hardest things for me to overcome.. but I think eating and drinking will get easier with time. Hang in there, I know it's tough - but know that you are'nt failing. You are succeeding in such a big way! By the end of it all you will be so happy with the way your life has changed Hang in there! Bonnie

Hi Bonnie! Thanks so much for your encouraging words. It helps to know that others have/are experiencing some of the same things.

Hi Suzy, My surgery was two days before yours, and YES, I understand what you mean about the emotional roller coaster. I have times when I am so weepy, or so cranky. My poor boyfriend! I tell him I want to be alone, so he gives me all the space I ask for, and then I feel LONELY! When I first talked about this, people suggested to me that I was grieving over not having food in my life as I used to. That didn't really feel like it was what was going on with me. But I do think it is related to that. We were in the (bad) habit of eating most of our meals out, and since surgery I have been kind of a hermit. I was not comfortable eating out, or with other people except family/boyfriend. So my social circle shrank down to a tiny circle of ONE. Since I have been able to eat more variety of things the last couple of weeks it's been better. I have eaten out several times and marveled at how "normal" I felt. But I still have my moments. For me, I just chalk it up to the HUGE set of changes that have come along with this surgery, some "just food", and some much more complex. Some days I feel like a mutant freak, to be honest, and I just hunker down, sip sip sip, walk walk walk, get in the protein, bla di bla. What keeps me going is the comments of folks who have been here, and they tell me that it DOES get better! I'm so sorry you had some post-surgery problems - I'm sure that was a downer. I have not had any problems, and the roller coaster has been intense. I can only imagine how much harder it is when you are not feeling well. As long as you are following dr's instructions, that's all you can do. I hope things get to feeling MUCh better for you, and soon! Take care, Kathy

Hi Kathy! You're right! Without this board it would be even more difficult. It's nice to be able share experiences and get feedback from others who understand what you're going through. Thanks again.

I hear you sweetie. I had surgery the same day as you and I did not have the problems you had, BUT I feel as wishy washy as you do. I did not realize what an emotional issue this was. I am consumed by getting in all my protien/water/food each day. I have been just staying in the house too, like a hermit, and I see everyone else doing things. I"m thinking much of this is due to the crappy weather we have had here the past few weekends. I"m hoping now that spring is here, and we get some sunshine that I will perk up. Eileen RNY 03/30/05 290/264 -26

Amen Sister! I too am consumed by getting in water, protein, etc. I'm struggling trying to get both in, as it takes me so long to eat in general. Then by the time I wait to be able to drink, it seems like it's a vicious circle. I keep pluggin away. Hopefully it will get easier soon. Thanks for your response. Looks like we're running pretty close. I had surgery the same day as you and am down 24 pounds. 237/213

Hey Suzy, I have been there with you. I feel like when I was pregnant and I made the mistake of watching a Hallmark commercial! I too have had several difficulties after surgery. I had surgery on 3/21 and everything seemed to go well but I developed a post-op fever and slow blood flow and was hospitalized for the first week. I never progressed from full liquids to soft foods until just this past weekend. I was hospitalized two weeks ago for dehydration. I was throwing even water or my vitamins up. This weekend I have finally been able to take one or two bites of food! I attribute my emotions to dealing with the full implication of my choice. You have changed your life forever, and just like bringing a new life into the world, it is going to wreak havoc with your hormones! Hang in there!

Thanks so much Annie. I am so sorry to hear about all of your complications. Mine seem pale in comparison. Have they checked you for a stricture? I had the same problem becoming dehydrated and unable to keep even water down. They determined that I had healed so well, so fast, that it had caused my opening to narrow to the point that hardly anything could trickle through. I hope your back on the road to wellness. I have to go back again a week from today for another Endoscopy to make sure that the opening is okay, and if not, to have them dilate it again. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that all goes well. You're probably right about emotions being tried to the implication of my choice. I did ask for this! I'm not sorry, nor do I have any regrets, I just think that the complication really set me back. I'm also told that since our bodies are basically starving that it also changes the entire system. Aren't hormones great! Thanks so much and good luck to you.