Depressing!

I have read all of your post for the last week and I know how you all feel!  I woke up in the middle of the night sick. I have never been sick since I had the surgery , I can eat anything and it doesn't brother me. But Wednesday night I ran to the bath room and I had dry heaves. I'm still sore from it. I have gained more weight and I feel awful. Everyday I think I've got to do better, but I don't know what to do. I stay hungry all the time. Oh well, this is life .  Love you all, Judy

Hi Judy,

I know how you feel.

Each of us is working very hard at trying to not only lose but just stay the same weight. None of us wants to gain.

we know that this surgery helped us to lose a lot of weight. We do not want to feel like we have failed. All of us knows that we are not bad people! So do not beat yourself up over this.

what we have to do now is to work at finding what works for us. I don't think the doctors have a cure. the surgeons did the surgery part and feel thats done for them. We need an after surgery doctor for long term. when someone finds out who let me know cause I'll travel to get to the info!

So we all come on here and share what we do know. If it makes sense to us then we use it or look into more info to find out what works for us.

I know that I've gone back to the water load 30 minutes before eating. I've not been a water drinker during meals or for a whiles after but now I'm watchign to make sure i'm keeping my water drinking at least 1 & 1/2 hours after eating. If we drink during or right after we eat what food that we have eaten gets pushed right out of our tummys. We need to keep it in there as long as possible. and with all that we've read its not staying in there for one reason or another.

We also need to eat dense protein. this is a hard one for alot of us cause it still can upset us.

I love cottage cheese. its got great protein low sugar and i get it with no fat. but it doens't last for me. So while i don't want to give it up its my nighttime snack. sometimes during the day but i know its not going to make it past 30 minutes. its not going to satisfy me and i'm going to be hungry. If i eat it with a cheese stick it lasts longer. the cottage cheese is too soft it floats right through. the cheese stick is denser so it stays longer.

cause of my low blood sugar i'm also having fruit not alot and not high sugar ones with my protein. i'm finding it is satisfying some of my sweet creavings! seedless grapes are a good one. they also aid in digestion.

if i do eat bread i stick to a whole wheat. i found one that is low calorie and doen'st mess with my different food allergies. never do white bread.

vegis have always been hard for me to eat. dont like em. never did never will. but we all need them. so i have those littel baby carrot sticks. i gag them down inbetween cheese sticks. and i also cut up fresh broccoli to have with my eggs in the morning. i also roll up broccoli with some onions inside of 2 to 3 slices of lo salt turkey, or roast beef or ham then put it in one of the whole wheat pitas or sliced whole wheat bread thats what i'll have for lunch along with 10 to 20 seedless red grapes. its filling for me. if it doesn't feel like i've filled up the bottomless pit i'll have a slice of cheese. i eat alot of cheese. that lasts me about 2 to 3 hours then i have to eat again not so much cause i'm starving its casues with the LBS i am not to go over 3 hours for eating.
at night i have chicken, or beef. and a vegi i do not do white potatoes they set my sugar off but i've gotten a taste for yams.

i'm holding my weight and the endo i go to actually said i lost a pound! so he was happy. i would have been thrilled it if was 10! hahaha my thyroid is out of wack it runs in my family and is not because of the surgery.

i liked it that i didn't feel hungry for years after the surgery. that was nice.

one thing the surgery did not do is take away the addiction to food. for me it always was and always will be an addiction. i'm not eating the sugar and bad foods that i use to mainly caus eit makes me feel so misrable and sick. that i can thank the LBS! I remember when i went to my docctor before sugery i said to him that i had LBS (but let me tell you it was nothing like it is now!) I said will i have this after surgery. and he said yes. i know tht there are many who have developed this after surgery for me it wasn't the case. I had it before then it got very bad after I abused laxatives daily for a summer. I have no one to blame on that but me. but i do not beat myself up over it. Its a fact its done I dont' do it anymore and now am healthy again. I have to work to keep it that way.

I have lived my whole life thinking about food and weight. from a kid to an adult i've always looked for a way to lose it. thinner is better and i loved being at my lowest. but healthy is best.

do yhou know what bothered you and made you feel sick?

Judy, I feel your pain. It really feels as if we are swimming upstream, doesn't it? Are you still seeing your surgeon annually? Have you discussed your issues with him/her? Forgive me if I'm wrong but weren't you one of the Marchers that never actually got to your goal weight, or close to it? (I think Elizabeth is another?) There really could be a 'mechanical' explanation about what's going on with you - we didn't have these surgeries to white-knuckle it for the rest of our lives! Yes, of course we should hold ourselves accountable if we are behaving in ways that will undermine any continued succes, such as eating foods that we know will result in weight gain; not exercising; not living fully in a manner that will provide us joy and happiness - all of these factors contribute to how successful we will be and for how long. But there is ample evidence that a HUGE factor is how your system is working - is it supporting your efforts or thwarting them? Try to stop going immediately to blaming yourself; try to distance yourself emotionally from what's going on so that you can then take a hard and neutral look at other considerations - your first step should be to have your anatomy scoped to determine the size of your pouch and stoma. How are you with the blood levels? When did you have your bloodwork done last? One thing I know for sure after reaching the ripe old age of 53 - I can't keep doing things exactly the same way and expect different results. Try something new, Judy. Get your "system" looked at via endoscopy - it's a very quick and painless procedure and it will provide you with great information so that you can better know how to proceed. Above all, dear friend - you are not alone. Hugs to you - Maureen

I never lost all my weight. My personal goal was 150, I got down to 169. I lost 86 pounds in 4 months, then without changing a thing I didn't lose another pound. I stayed around the same for 3 years then , of course I was eating wrong all along, then I gained about 20 pounds the next year , then the next year I gained 30 pounds.  The first day of 2010 I weighed the same thing I did the first day of 2009, I had gained and lost the same 15 pounds over and over. I have a lot of pain and I know the weight causes it. My feet and back hurt so bad and I went to a pain managerment doctor today for the first time ever and he didn't mention my weight, but he said he can help me. I hope he is right. Maybe if my feet didn't hurt so bad I would exercise. I am allergic to all kinds of pain medicine and I can take asprin or anything with asprin in it , but he has given me a new kind of medicine made for a plant base and it's suppost to help with joint pain and swelling.
Thanks Pammy and Maureen for caring!!  Love y'all.