On The UP Side of This (and then I'll shut up)

Yes, there are very real and serious consequences to this surgery if we fall short of remaining vigilent caregivers of our own health. Even when we are vigilent, there appears to be medical issues associated with malabsorption, a direct consequence to the restructuring of our entire gastro-intestinal systems. Ok, now what? On the upside - I'm going to stick my neck out a little further and identify Joanie as the one person on this Board who seems to have gotten it Right. She had the surgery, lost the weight, and is maintaining her weight loss; much more importantly, she is living a balanced life, physically and mentally. Not so in my corner - I fight the demons of food obsession and emotional overeating every day. I suspect this will always be the case for me. So, if you are like me, you are testing the waters, eating sugar (in some form or another) every day - not only will this mean weight regain, but again more importantly - I am messing with my endocrine system, I am experiencing extreme highs and lows in my sugar levels. Is this healthy? Nope, no way. I could live with my 20 lb. weight gain (God willing that's all!) if I could experience the lovliness of balanced living - make the demons die in my head, make the feelings of self-loathing disappear forever. Yes, yes, I know - find a good therapist. I have but there are no guarantees that whatever pain we are experiencing - in our minds, our hearts, our bodies - will ever disappear. So I will try to speak for myself here - I MUST stop looking to food for comfort. It does not comfort me. It destroys me. I wish you all great peace and joy in your hearts and in your lives - you mean the world to me. And I leave you with a James Dean quote:  Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today. Love, Reenie

 and as the great Anatole France say...."To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe"  I try to live by that....be well Reenie, your thinking in the right direction......

Reenie---as I do love my life and everything in it, I also have my ups and downs as well.  I eat balanced.  By balanced, I mean I eat everything...including sugar...in moderation.  Some days I eat more than others.  I have had many MANY years of the ups and downs, self loathing, etc.  I made the decision to change that.  I set a plan and followed it.  It was not a matter of discipline or will power, it was for self preservation, both physically and mentally.  When I moved away from my home town it was done as a matter of survival. I was able to do this with the help of a good therapist, and a strong desire to change my life.  I do believe that my food issues are/were much different than most people who post on this board.  I have learned to find comfort in things other than food.  That is something, that if you decide to do it, it will happen.  I guess what I am trying to say is that YOU are in the drivers seat.  You are the one with the power to change things.  If you are in a bad situation at home, and your spouse or child talks down to you, it is only because you allow it to happen.  Since my lowest weight, I had a 12 pound weight gain.  My surgeon told me to expect this...that this was normal for WLS patients.  I get on the scale every day.  I have edema issues and have to take Lasix every day.  I also had trouble with constipation, and found that Senna tea does the trick for me.  Due to demands at work, I am not as diligent at the gym as I should be, however, I try to get a walk or bike ride in a few times a week.  
Yes, its true, my life IS balanced physically and mentally...it takes a lot of work and a strong desire to make things happen.  I hope you find it within yourself to set goals to get rid of the demons and find peace within yourself.  Sometimes the road to get there is drastic and painful but well worth it in the end.
Good luck to you, my friend,
Joanie

  Truer words never said!  Precisely. Exactly. Dead on. Your strength blows me away - thanks Joanie. Please stay close to us, we really, really need your inspiration.  Blessings to you - Maureen