Checking in

I have not been perfect in my eating, but then perfection is one of my enemies.

During the last 3 days, I have completely avoided the crackers, and bread and carby snacks between meals.

I have turned to cheese and protein for snacks (and not even that much of that!)

The only sweet thing I have eaten was a pear.

I have eaten reasonably healthy meals without overstuffing.   

Results:
-  Finally, as of today, the constant carb cravings are noticably dropping off.
-  I have not had a single dumping / coma-type episode after eating

I am feeling hope that I may yet regain some element of control.

Now, by calorie count is still too high, and my caffeine intake is still too high, but one baby step at a time, I am reclaiming my life from this addiction.

p.s.  I rewarded myself by coloring my hair.   (A friend had just "complemented" me on how "good" it looks since I "let it go gray"!)

If I never lose an ounce, it is worth the "sacrifice" to have freedom and feel so much better!

I hope you are doing well, my friends...

Joy

I'm really proud of you, Joy.  It takes a strong person to come on here and lay it all on the table like you have and you've been a great inspiration to me. 

Last Thanksgiving, we were at The Man's brother's in-laws for dinner.  The Man looks forward to Thanksgiving dinner starting the day after Thanksgiving.  My back was really giving me a lot of trouble and I didn't feel like socializing, but it meant alot to TM to be with his large extended family so there we were.  One of the relatives is a professional chef at a very high end restaurant in Chicago and he and his family had flown in.  There were friends and relatives from age 4 to 90.  The chef had been smoking turkeys on the grill all day and dinner was just about ready.   I'm not sure what happened next, but TM's sister-in-law, who I adore, became furious at her father's girlfriend, stormed into the kitchen, told me to get out of the way and shoved me.  I know she wasn't angry with me, but I have never tolerated having hands layed on me in anger for any reason. I didn't want to make a scene, but knew I couldn't stay and pretend I wasn't angry so I went to TM, who was positively intoxicated and giddy from turkey fumes and quietly told him that I wanted to go home.  Without asking why, TM took his keys out of his pocket and  took my hand.  We said our goodbyes to the family and I told them I was not feeling well. We walked out to the car and TM never asked me why we were leaving, he just gave me unconditional support.  I started to explain and apologize, but TM stopped me, told me that he completely trusted and supported me and if we were leaving, I must have had a good reason.  Honestly, I felt stupid and selfish for depriving TM of something that he was so looking forward to.

So here we are,  May 3rd at 2:18 in the morning and I have a Butterball 16 1/2 pound turkey thawing in the sink.  I have all the ingredients for a full blown Thanksgiving dinner.  I need to finally reward TM for his undying support and trust, but the best part is that this turkey will help me get back on track.  What better protein than a lean and juicy turkey breast?  I'm cooking this for The Man, but this is going to help me so much

Keep going, Joy.  You're a source of inspiration to me.

Warm hugs,

C.

I love the way you always make me laugh, Connie.   I got all caught up in your story and totally forgot that it was a reply to my post.   I was surprised to find my name at the end of it!  

Yes, I'd say you are a few month's late in repaying TM for his lost turkey-day.   And yes, that is great protein.    Unfortunately, the dressing is my favorite part though....



Thanks for the encouragement...

Joy

A terrific story, thanks for sharing this...

 Good for you!! You can do this!! Keep up the fight!!

I really relate this what you're going through. I was able to leave work on Friday without having M&Ms, and I hope I can claim likewise today. You're my inspiration right now - thanks. M.

Way to go Reenie.   You can whoop those M&Ms!