Mo's Post
Never one to keep my mouth shut -- Mo's post sure deserved more responses than just my own, even in terms of just support. If I said anything in my own answer to offend anyone or put people off, I'm sorry - but seems to me Mo put out a sort of S.O.S. and we've always rallied for each other... just had to put it out there - M.
((( Reenie )))
Thanks for your support, but I'm not worried about responses or lack there of. I know the way the board ebbs and flows. There are many times when I will read the same post over and over and STILL not respond. I needed to post what I did for me ... to be honest with myself in red and white!
I'll still be here .. lurking and posting.
Hugs, Mo
Thanks for your support, but I'm not worried about responses or lack there of. I know the way the board ebbs and flows. There are many times when I will read the same post over and over and STILL not respond. I needed to post what I did for me ... to be honest with myself in red and white!
I'll still be here .. lurking and posting.
Hugs, Mo
Comparison is the thief of joy!
If we spend our time comparing our life/weight loss/body to others, we totally miss what WE have accomplished. Keep in mind how far you have come and what you can do now that you couldn't do weeks/months/years ago. I hate the expression " It's all good", but in this case it fits! Wherever you are in your journey ... It's ALL good!!!
i, for one, have now read her post three times- i don't know what to say ...i personally found myself wishing this past weekend taht i had never had my RNY..so what can i possibly say to mo -or anyone- to make her feel any better about herself????
mo- i feel ya on the 16's--i struggle daily with the same issues....and i just have no words for you--
reenie- i know you mean well- some days tho--wow- oh gosh...i am sorry- i just have to be perfectly honest here-and i just deleted part of this post cuz it wasn't going to come across right....
some days- i feel realllllll neglected here and have to agree with what marilyn said about the board and posts not being answered.....however-having said that- i know we all have lives....and sometimes it is just better NOT to expound than to say some of the stuff that gets said....ouch--ok-i'm going back to my hole......
mo- i feel ya on the 16's--i struggle daily with the same issues....and i just have no words for you--
reenie- i know you mean well- some days tho--wow- oh gosh...i am sorry- i just have to be perfectly honest here-and i just deleted part of this post cuz it wasn't going to come across right....
some days- i feel realllllll neglected here and have to agree with what marilyn said about the board and posts not being answered.....however-having said that- i know we all have lives....and sometimes it is just better NOT to expound than to say some of the stuff that gets said....ouch--ok-i'm going back to my hole......
I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning my day difficult.
- E. B. White
I always, always mean well - and when you're hurting, I'm hurting; same goes for everyone here. And I know you're hurting right now, really badly. So I'm not going to take anything you're thinking or feeling about me personally. I just want you to know that I care and I wish there was something I could do. Your last post was answered, Margo, by people *****ally care about you. I've been where you are - as recently as two nights ago - sitting at my kitchen table talking quietly to my husband about just feeling like I am done, just done, used up, nothing left. I bounce back and forth - but I keep getting up, some days a little slower than others ... all we can do here is offer our support to each other. There is real depression on this board that needs serious attention. It scares me. Maureen
i am past the done and used up reenie- that's where i am ...tho this week so far i am feeling a teensy spark of life again....
i have to address something that was said in response to my post last week- michael will NEVER go back to work in any meaningful capacity since his fall of 3-06-06....he is receiving medicare-and we pay a big penny for it --med A is nothing but med B and D (drugs) costs!!!! and anyone telling you that medicare is a piece of cake has never struggled thru the forms and the regulations and etc!!! it IS NOT user friendly and it IS NOT designed to protect the senior citizens--a senior citizen needs an advocate to get thru much of the crap....
i am frightened to death for us when we hit 65 and 70--i have to work til 72 to get anything form Soc Sec worth getting-and that won't be much...and there is no 401k for eaither of us-had to live on them after he fell-nothing in savings no nothing--just whatever is in my purse right now and that isn't much...and my blood plasma every week-is sketchy if i can do it each time- my iron and protein go up and down so i can't even rely on that ....
we make $500 too much each month for food stamps- so-do i quit my job and stay home? no- not an option- my job -tho it is $273 take home every two weeks- at least makes my monthly car payment... i have no health insurance -am praying that can change soon! and i pray daily not to get sick....
we make too much money for help with heat and electricity too-- yet we do not make enough to pay all of our bills every month so i play games as to who gets paid and who doesn't and soemtimes i miss a space and forget to pay something and something gets shut off..ouch!!!
sorry- i am just at the end of the rope- i have been struggling to hold it together since he got sick in april of 2005--keep thinking it will get better and it just isn't improving--i was at 150 # then- successful at wls in my docs' eyes- had lost 83#---now after my regain of 33 # i am sitting at 179-180 and i cannot get my head wrapped around what is needed to get it off- i am not healthy as i should be and i really am so tired of struggling with what i can and cannot eat....i question each and every decision i make about anything in life and i just am so tired...
i know- i am not alone-and i know that many of us on this board are struggling with some of the same demons...and there are many many folks who have it a lot harder than we do---i stood in a food handout line a few saturdays ago--hadn't done that since the early 1980's when i had to to feed my 3 children - their steelworker father was laid off for 2+ years and then on lockout... it was degrading to do it then and it is still degrading however we had to do it and i am so grateful that we could.....michael remembers when he used to carry 3400 CASH in his boot wallet-now he has a $2 bill that he refuses to break and that is it--unless i give him a dollar for something-sad state....
sorry- i have turned this into more of a pity party --
you are right-mo's post deserves more- one thing is that she is coming to grips with where she is -and so that is a positive step----
i'm sorry- i just have so much built up inside and i really am afraid to let it out cuz it ain't all pretty!!!! some of the folks out here are not living in the real world- their own worlds are not what they wish- they are struggling but they just don't see what marilyn and i are going thru....i just thank God that my kids are no longer little- tho they have their own struggles- my youngest just turned his house back to the bank-walked away from his mortgage and we are all struggling with that....the eldest has 3 daughters to raise and cannot get a decent job to save his soul....
do you know that mc donald's starts their closing shift ppl out at more than i make right now???that sucks--and i cannot work at mcd's--cannot-long story-not going there now-- i would work at a gas station if one would hire me tho!!!!!!!!!!!!
ok- sorry--reenie- thank you for trying to understand....i know that you want to--but i don't think you really do....you haven't walked in my shoes completely-and i don't expect you to....this is not personal and i pray that you don't take it that way....
as to what you can do-continue caring-about me and mo and lizbet and kim and connie and mikey and pammie and judy and joanie and dawg and dina everyone--i am sure i left someone out-sorry! and stay outta the m & m's!!!! just be you -
i have to address something that was said in response to my post last week- michael will NEVER go back to work in any meaningful capacity since his fall of 3-06-06....he is receiving medicare-and we pay a big penny for it --med A is nothing but med B and D (drugs) costs!!!! and anyone telling you that medicare is a piece of cake has never struggled thru the forms and the regulations and etc!!! it IS NOT user friendly and it IS NOT designed to protect the senior citizens--a senior citizen needs an advocate to get thru much of the crap....
i am frightened to death for us when we hit 65 and 70--i have to work til 72 to get anything form Soc Sec worth getting-and that won't be much...and there is no 401k for eaither of us-had to live on them after he fell-nothing in savings no nothing--just whatever is in my purse right now and that isn't much...and my blood plasma every week-is sketchy if i can do it each time- my iron and protein go up and down so i can't even rely on that ....
we make $500 too much each month for food stamps- so-do i quit my job and stay home? no- not an option- my job -tho it is $273 take home every two weeks- at least makes my monthly car payment... i have no health insurance -am praying that can change soon! and i pray daily not to get sick....
we make too much money for help with heat and electricity too-- yet we do not make enough to pay all of our bills every month so i play games as to who gets paid and who doesn't and soemtimes i miss a space and forget to pay something and something gets shut off..ouch!!!
sorry- i am just at the end of the rope- i have been struggling to hold it together since he got sick in april of 2005--keep thinking it will get better and it just isn't improving--i was at 150 # then- successful at wls in my docs' eyes- had lost 83#---now after my regain of 33 # i am sitting at 179-180 and i cannot get my head wrapped around what is needed to get it off- i am not healthy as i should be and i really am so tired of struggling with what i can and cannot eat....i question each and every decision i make about anything in life and i just am so tired...
i know- i am not alone-and i know that many of us on this board are struggling with some of the same demons...and there are many many folks who have it a lot harder than we do---i stood in a food handout line a few saturdays ago--hadn't done that since the early 1980's when i had to to feed my 3 children - their steelworker father was laid off for 2+ years and then on lockout... it was degrading to do it then and it is still degrading however we had to do it and i am so grateful that we could.....michael remembers when he used to carry 3400 CASH in his boot wallet-now he has a $2 bill that he refuses to break and that is it--unless i give him a dollar for something-sad state....
sorry- i have turned this into more of a pity party --
you are right-mo's post deserves more- one thing is that she is coming to grips with where she is -and so that is a positive step----
i'm sorry- i just have so much built up inside and i really am afraid to let it out cuz it ain't all pretty!!!! some of the folks out here are not living in the real world- their own worlds are not what they wish- they are struggling but they just don't see what marilyn and i are going thru....i just thank God that my kids are no longer little- tho they have their own struggles- my youngest just turned his house back to the bank-walked away from his mortgage and we are all struggling with that....the eldest has 3 daughters to raise and cannot get a decent job to save his soul....
do you know that mc donald's starts their closing shift ppl out at more than i make right now???that sucks--and i cannot work at mcd's--cannot-long story-not going there now-- i would work at a gas station if one would hire me tho!!!!!!!!!!!!
ok- sorry--reenie- thank you for trying to understand....i know that you want to--but i don't think you really do....you haven't walked in my shoes completely-and i don't expect you to....this is not personal and i pray that you don't take it that way....
as to what you can do-continue caring-about me and mo and lizbet and kim and connie and mikey and pammie and judy and joanie and dawg and dina everyone--i am sure i left someone out-sorry! and stay outta the m & m's!!!! just be you -
I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning my day difficult.
- E. B. White
(((( Margo ))))
Hugs, Mo
Comparison is the thief of joy!
If we spend our time comparing our life/weight loss/body to others, we totally miss what WE have accomplished. Keep in mind how far you have come and what you can do now that you couldn't do weeks/months/years ago. I hate the expression " It's all good", but in this case it fits! Wherever you are in your journey ... It's ALL good!!!
hehe... God love ya reenie... I missed this post... lol... I haven't been around unfortuantely to have seen her post. but I'm here now and responded before seeing this post. LOL.... anywhoo... I'lll respond. I'm so there about the whole not a poster child for WLS. i swear i feel like a total looser some days in regards to that. I havent been under 200 and everytime i think of what i EXPECTED i am so let down and feel so sad about it. BUT you can't dwell on that because its not healthy and just makes it even worse. I start to get that feeling in the pit of my stomach and force myself to focus on something else before I throw myself a full on depressing all out pity party in the worst degree. 'sigh' Just gotta get myself under control. Pray and try to get the exercise in. Exercise is really the key. Of course we all know that. we all gotta get moving more! I was there... honestly i was... the day i was giong to work out at the gym people from my unit at work got laid off... lots and lots of tears and crying and then STTRRREESSSSS and just BOOM. there went that idea out the window. so gotta get back in the ready to work out again. whenever i get THAT thrown off it takes me awhile to get back in the right mindset. If that makes any sense. I think I was and still am in such shock of almost loosing my job that I can't .... function quite yet...
"Never act until you have answered the question 'What happens if I do nothing?'" - Robert Brault
"Love is borne from soul to soul on the wings of words." - Rudolph Steiner
Elizabeth M 
btdt about the job thing- oh yea--it's a head thing to get the act together...
and teh expectations of surgery...whoa! let's not go there today!!!! you are not alone!
and teh expectations of surgery...whoa! let's not go there today!!!! you are not alone!
I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning my day difficult.
- E. B. White
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