Confession
Pat, when I saw your post, I started to cry - really! Like an angel that just dropped in to rest on the shoulders of our beloved board, of a sorely missed family member ... it is soooooo wonderful to hear from you, and at such a crucial time, at least for me and I suspect for some of the rest of us. Thank you for this post. I am on an antidepressant but as I was telling my husband, I don't feel any better - in fact, I feel worse. Low energy, and certainly hasn't helped with my mood - and I dunno, I'm one of those people that really believes in your mood being affected by the way you live your life, you know? Life cir****tances - lead by example, doing for others, taking care of yourself, being good to yourself - all of that ... instead of the other way around, "... well, get on the drug first so that you can change the chemistry in your brain so that you can then change your life cir****tances so that you can then feel better." Anyway, this stuff (Topomax) isn't working so I guess I better get in to see if there's something else in the doc's little black bag. But you sound wonderful. And I am SO HAPPY, so very happy you posted!!! Won't you stay? Can you give us an update, how are you doing, are you holding steady with your weight loss - any success strategies you can share? Really, thank you so much - I'll stop crying now!! Maureen
Dear Maureen:
Thank you for replying with a warm welcome.
Do try different antidepressants until you find the right one. It will amaze you how well they work.
In looking at some other posts I realize that you have a teenager. Teenagers will drag the strongest of us down. My daughter at age 12 1/2 started to go bad - sneaking out of her window at night to be with boys, and skipping school. I thought I would lose my mind and heart. It was a terrible time. I sent her to The Eckerd Wilderness Camp for a year and a half. For the first year she only came home for a weekend every six weeks. The last three months she came home every weekend. She returned at age 14 a warm loving girl and an industrious student. She is now 39 y o, a college grad, and the best mother I have ever seen. She is also my best friend. Hang in there, get help. There is hope. BTW - I worked very hard at getting her into the right place and I went to every parent meeting and couseling session they offered.
You asked me to update. My weight is fine. I had gone down about 25 pounds below goal and now weigh about 130. I wear size 6. I have no secret or otherwise ways of keeping the weight off. I don't eat very much. I do eat junk food, every day but that's so limited that it doesn't effect my weight. I do not exercise. When I turned 60 y o I realized that the longest I had ever kept up with an exercise program was 6 months and that was only once in my life. So I made a decision to just forget it. I'm far from a slug and keep busy but no formal exercise for me. My husband and I sold our business three summers ago and are now retired. That put me into the depression (believe it or not). We've adjusted. I took the meds and now all is fine in my world. My 94 y o mother lives with us. She needs some physical care but her mind is good. My son ,and daughter, SIL and granddaughter visit with us very frequently.Thanks for asking.
Take good care of yourself,
Pat
Thank you for replying with a warm welcome.
Do try different antidepressants until you find the right one. It will amaze you how well they work.
In looking at some other posts I realize that you have a teenager. Teenagers will drag the strongest of us down. My daughter at age 12 1/2 started to go bad - sneaking out of her window at night to be with boys, and skipping school. I thought I would lose my mind and heart. It was a terrible time. I sent her to The Eckerd Wilderness Camp for a year and a half. For the first year she only came home for a weekend every six weeks. The last three months she came home every weekend. She returned at age 14 a warm loving girl and an industrious student. She is now 39 y o, a college grad, and the best mother I have ever seen. She is also my best friend. Hang in there, get help. There is hope. BTW - I worked very hard at getting her into the right place and I went to every parent meeting and couseling session they offered.
You asked me to update. My weight is fine. I had gone down about 25 pounds below goal and now weigh about 130. I wear size 6. I have no secret or otherwise ways of keeping the weight off. I don't eat very much. I do eat junk food, every day but that's so limited that it doesn't effect my weight. I do not exercise. When I turned 60 y o I realized that the longest I had ever kept up with an exercise program was 6 months and that was only once in my life. So I made a decision to just forget it. I'm far from a slug and keep busy but no formal exercise for me. My husband and I sold our business three summers ago and are now retired. That put me into the depression (believe it or not). We've adjusted. I took the meds and now all is fine in my world. My 94 y o mother lives with us. She needs some physical care but her mind is good. My son ,and daughter, SIL and granddaughter visit with us very frequently.Thanks for asking.
Take good care of yourself,
Pat
Wow, Pat, what a story. Is the Eckerd Wilderness Camp still in existence? I'm going to Google it, Jim and I often talk about trying to find a place like that but then we get so scared in thinking about actually sending him there. Like your daughter, Devin is such a warm, good, bright young person - but he has an addictive nature (no surprise there) and his addiction is the computer and gaming, even though we have policed this behavior since he was 6 years old! Never have we owned the Game Boys or X-Box, and the computer has always been in a common space, and he must use a password to get on, and only Jim and I know it! So he has to earn the privilege! We have never been parents who just give their kids free reign to this stuff and yet here he is, absolutely addicted to it. He trembles when he's playing, honestly trembles. Anyway, thank you for sharing your story, it gives me hope and has helped to pull me out of my dark place. And congratulations on your wonderful success! If I recall, you and your husband operated a Dude Ranch, didn't you, with lots of horses? I'm so glad you're feeling better with all that change in your life - and keeping your weight so stabilized, wow - remarkable. Please stick around as you are able, it's just been so wonderful having you "home" ! Maureen
Oh my gosh, that's too funny - Elizabeth, where are you?? This is too, too, too funny!!! Oh, I needed this laugh!! 
Maureen,
I think we're all in a collective funk and you're right,the world is a scarey place. I'm not about to turn this forum into a political free-for-all, but I'm disheartened with some of my fellow Americans. One of my sisters can no longer afford to feed her animals and my other sister can't afford to feed her kids.
I'm sorry that I haven't been around as much as I should be. This has been a really, really rough time for me health-wise and it's about all I can do to get to work more days than not. My arthritis is giving me hell and walking is incredibly painful these days. When I was in the hospital with pnuemonia, they did a CT scan and my left kidney is full of stones and calcified. Good news is that I'm on so much morphine for my back and hip that I can't feel the stones. Found out a couple of weeks ago that a cornea transplant is in my future.
Reenie, stay with me and we'll muddle through this together. We have good friends here and they need us as much as we need them.
Lots of love,
Connie
I'm remembering you and your gazillion sit ups 4 years ago and my thinking, 'geez, how does she DO that?' You are going through such a rough time of it physically - how did you get the pnuemonia, anyway? And what are they doing for the arthritis? I have it in my thumbs (all the computer work for the last 4 decades) and it's degenerative - and that pain is enough to leave me screaming in my office, so I can only imagine your pain. I'm so sorry, Connie. And let me tell you this - when I thought about leaving this weekend (oh, I was feeling so down) ... I thought about you, leaving you. And that's really what gave me pause. Made me think, "Wait a minute, these folks have been there for you for these past 5 years in ways that most people wouldn't understand." And I thought maybe, just maybe, they want you - Reenie - to stick around. I have to believe I have something of value to add here. And that is this - my hand to you - to everyone. Today and always. I'm here for you. As you have been for me. I love you, my dear friend. Maureen
I still try to do sit ups and I think I'd be in a wheelchair y now if I didn't. I used to be able to crank out a thousand with little effort and now I'm lucky if I can do a hundred, but I keep at it.
I got the pnuemonia when I threw up bile in my sleep, startled myself awake and inhaled the bile. The ER doctor kept telling me that people can't really do that because the body has natural mechanisms that prevent you from asphyxiating yourself. The Man told her that as a cop, he's seen it many, many times and attended autopsies where asphyxiation on bile was the cause of death. I reminded her that Jimmy Hendrix died of the same thing, but she wouldn't hear it. I'm over it now so that's behind me.
My particular brand of Rheumatoid Arthritis is an insideous disease that attacks the organs and eyes in addition to the spine. Today I can't walk. I'm on morphine and Vicodine and muscle relaxers and today the pain is still so great that I CAN'T walk. I clutch the furniture and walls to drag myself to the bathroom and back to bed. Some days are like that and hopefully tomorrow will be better. On Thursday, I get an injection that hopefully will get me back on my feet and mobile.
I really feel for you with the arthritis in your thumbs. To have to use the afflicted joints over and over again while you type has to be excruciating. At last I don't have to type with my backside. Can you take anything for your thumbs? I used to take Tylenol, but that's out along with all NSAIDS. That's something I didn't really think about pre-surgery, but it wouldn't have stopped me even if I had undrstood the long-term implications.
A couple of weeks ago, the eye doctor told me that I have corneal dystrophy. I'm hoping to avoid a cornea transplant in the future, but the good news is that if I have to have a transplant down the road, they are almost always successful with little chance of rejection.
You know, physically, it's been a really rough year, but I still consider myself very fortunate. I'm not carrying around an extra 130 pounds. Unlike so may people on this board and in the country, I have insurance to cover the doctors and drugs. My prescription co-pays this month were 400.00 so I can't imagine what the drugs would have cost without insurance. I just wouldn't have been able to afford them and honestly would have been resorting to something illegal or done myself in to get away from the pain. I've got a high pain threshold, but between kidney stones, ruptured disks and deteriorating bones, I wouldn't have been able to take it.
Maureen (you'll always be Reenie to me), I'm glad you decided to stick it out with us. Not only do I want you here, I need you here.
Hugs and Love,
C.
I got the pnuemonia when I threw up bile in my sleep, startled myself awake and inhaled the bile. The ER doctor kept telling me that people can't really do that because the body has natural mechanisms that prevent you from asphyxiating yourself. The Man told her that as a cop, he's seen it many, many times and attended autopsies where asphyxiation on bile was the cause of death. I reminded her that Jimmy Hendrix died of the same thing, but she wouldn't hear it. I'm over it now so that's behind me.
My particular brand of Rheumatoid Arthritis is an insideous disease that attacks the organs and eyes in addition to the spine. Today I can't walk. I'm on morphine and Vicodine and muscle relaxers and today the pain is still so great that I CAN'T walk. I clutch the furniture and walls to drag myself to the bathroom and back to bed. Some days are like that and hopefully tomorrow will be better. On Thursday, I get an injection that hopefully will get me back on my feet and mobile.
I really feel for you with the arthritis in your thumbs. To have to use the afflicted joints over and over again while you type has to be excruciating. At last I don't have to type with my backside. Can you take anything for your thumbs? I used to take Tylenol, but that's out along with all NSAIDS. That's something I didn't really think about pre-surgery, but it wouldn't have stopped me even if I had undrstood the long-term implications.
A couple of weeks ago, the eye doctor told me that I have corneal dystrophy. I'm hoping to avoid a cornea transplant in the future, but the good news is that if I have to have a transplant down the road, they are almost always successful with little chance of rejection.
You know, physically, it's been a really rough year, but I still consider myself very fortunate. I'm not carrying around an extra 130 pounds. Unlike so may people on this board and in the country, I have insurance to cover the doctors and drugs. My prescription co-pays this month were 400.00 so I can't imagine what the drugs would have cost without insurance. I just wouldn't have been able to afford them and honestly would have been resorting to something illegal or done myself in to get away from the pain. I've got a high pain threshold, but between kidney stones, ruptured disks and deteriorating bones, I wouldn't have been able to take it.
Maureen (you'll always be Reenie to me), I'm glad you decided to stick it out with us. Not only do I want you here, I need you here.
Hugs and Love,
C.
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